Pregnancy and Parenting Society Mark II

Wow, congratulations! Did you wait until she was born to decide on the name, or did you already know it?

I'm 20 weeks as of today, and I've got my next scan coming up on Thursday. Very excited about this one - I want to know what the sex is!

How is everyone else? Randdom - you must be pretty far along now, aren't you?

Wow - working in A&E at 34 weeks. Don't know how you do it.

I kind of planned everything so I'd be working from home (and only part-time too!) for pregnancy as well as after it, and I'm really glad I did. From throwing up in the first trimester (how do people do that at work?) to just feeling generally kind of tired and ill even now, I'd hate having to go in to work every day at the moment.

We have our 20 week scan on Thursday! So excited.

Vomitting into sick bags (found online - fairly waterproof with these gel beads to thicken the vomit and a resealable strip along the top) on my Tube/walk commute to work has to go down as one of my all-time life lows... it may have had some protective effects stopping me from getting the norovirus that was doing the rounds though!
& in all seriousness - I had about 7 days off sick in the 1st-2nd trimester because the lack of oral intake/vomitting was a bit much & work combined pretty much every obvious trigger (hungry? tired? stressed?).

Not sure how life would be when (hopefully!) we do it again with a toddler in the mix too - but the plan is to be working part-time and slightly more civilized hours by then...

Good luck for your the 20 week scan! Do you have much of a kicker yet?

Eek!

Yes I do! The baby has been nicknamed 'Herbie' because the midwife said, in the first scan, 'it's going bananas in there!' and true to its name Herbie has been quite the kicker - my partner has already been able to feel some kicks which seems to be, in a first pregnancy, quite uncommon at this stage. I'm probably already feeling at least 30-50 kicks a day on average - which sounds like it's pretty active for 20 weeks?

Just hoping this doesn't mean Herbie is going to be a little hellraiser a year down the line...

Sounds like my bump. My husband started to be able to feel kicks at about 18 week. If you go anything like me you will have a very active baby who moves your bump into any shape imaginable

Good luck for 20 weeks, I can't remember if I have asked you but are you finding out?

We are and we did! It's a boy. Not fb official yet because my partner doesn't want to tell people apart from family (and after all, TSR is a great big family really...)

It's nice to have a pronoun I think. Partner is really nervous about raising a boy, I think because he was bullied for not being into sports and fighting as a kid, but I'm sure it's a little different these days - it seems more cool to be into spiderman and videogames.

And now, the names debate...

My partner's first name, middle name, and surname all have 7 letters in them, and so do his Dad's. Apparently this means he's wanted to give his kids 7 letter names since he was a kid.

Ohmigodwhatamigoingtodo.

So frustrating.

I found name discussions one of the most stressful but also enjoyable bits. It took my husband and I ages and ages to agree on a boys name that we might never use!

I used to enjoy it when it was more speculative, but now I find it incredibly stressful. We don't seem to be able to agree, and when he *does* like a name that I like it always seems to be half-hearted; and then he suggests names and I ask him if he's kidding and he says 'I'm not sure actually'. It's difficult to get anywhere when that happens!

x

Anyone have any experience with this? I get on very well with my manager and we've been friends for a number of years.

Edit: Just another question, how soon to actually tell people? A few friends know as they've noticed pre-natal vitamins at the house and just generally telling people however my cousin told the family at only 5 weeks gone! I obviously work in a very physically exhausting job as a nurse and wondering if it's safe to tell work as soon as I know, or is it ok in this sector to wait till the 12 weeks scan?

I kept schtum about TTC (to everyone) until had a pregnancy to announce, although if it had come up in conversation would've said we've always wanted a family.
When it comes to TTC#2 which'll be starting in the next few months will definitely be keeping quiet again...
& if there's a #3 & #4 (which we would hypothetically like) definitely won't be telling potential employers in advance & if they think our family is done now with 1 or 2 (so I'm a safer bet than a childless woman!) won't be removing that notion from them....

People can't 'unknow' something if they know, even if they try not to consider it etc.




If you want a work risk assessment for your pregnancy then obviously you have to let them know. You have to let them know by about 25/40 if 'practicable' for maternity leave purposes.

I was pretty unwell (vomitting on ward rounds at start and end of the day and took about 7 days off sick in total) from about 6 weeks so did 'tell work', but that was my Boss & immediate colleagues only - as I wanted to explain why I probably wasn't pulling my weight.

If I'd been fine then I would've waited. We didn't tell any family or friends till 12 week scan - but working in Obstetrics makes you very sceptical that a conception will actually result in a healthy baby!
If there's a #2 I'd like to not tell anyone till about 16/40 (when we know sex) but if I'm unwell I suspect I'll need to tell work again earlier.

Are you willing to go along with the 7 letter thing? If so then a good starting point might be looking through the top 250 names separately and each making a list and then come together to discuss them?

Yeah, just read our trusts policy...apparently a risk assessment is needed, not 100% what that involves!

Yeah, just read our trusts policy...apparently a risk assessment is needed, not 100% what that involves!

I don't think I'll tell family and friends till 12 weeks...might wait till the child is 18years old to tell my mum. She got completely overexcited about my cousin announcing her 5 week pregnancy I don't want the fuss for me...! She's an ex-midwife and antenatal teacher and can just imagine the amount of 'knowledge bombs' she'd want to drop on me and telling me what to do, although grateful she's 200 miles away- but may appreciate her being closer when it comes to childcare!

I thought i'd be totally relaxed and cool about TTC but keep jumping on every little symptom and i've only been off the implant for over a week!