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This is for the guys... watch

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    (Original post by luce20)
    I didn't say it lightly, believe me. I told him that despite liking him a great deal, I couldn't understand why there wasn't that chemistry there and I really don't know why. I'm not a *****, regardless of how it looks.
    If that is true and you've known each other for six years, I'm sure, as I wrote earlier, come around to you, but you've got to show him that you genuinely want this.

    You were friends for six years which is a long time, so moving up to a relationship level will always be awkward and the spark may not be there from the outset, but that's not to say give up.
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    Well hes found out that there is no future with you (in the relationship sense) so is there really anything wrong with him not speaking to you while he tries to get over you?
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    (Original post by luce20)
    Eh not 6 years, I see him for 6 hours a week at college in the evening and we just clicked from last september. I'm thinking given the short time we've known each other, just to leave it, thats not to say I feel really good about it!!
    Oh ok, my bad.

    That changes a lot. But I think the underlying advice remains: send him one more message, maybe in a couple of days, and if he comes around, he does, great; if not, at least you know you tried and that's that.
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    You told him there was no spark, so why should he bother? The blocking on fb was a little harsh though. You sound like your confused, you say you like him, but have no spark? Errrm ok
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    (Original post by luce20)
    Yeah I get it, but blocking me on fb..really from a 25 year old? I've tried enough today to be honest and I'm now in the position where I'm thinking
    F*** you, get on with it.
    What have you done today to show you're trying?
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    He's being extremely childish, as most men are nowadays with the invention of internet- blocking on msn/fb... what happened to good old face-to-face rage?

    I doubt it will work out if he's acting like this, he's just not ready yet...

    However about the whole spark thing, it's just a first kiss, it often is meaningless or at least it's too over-hyped up.
    When I fist kissed the guy I was seeing, I felt nothing. After another go, nothing still. This was all romantic too, in a forest bit with stars and then some light rain. I made it clear I felt nothing, he didn't seem to be upset just said he's gonna try harder to impress me. Then slowly my feelings grew for him over dating and going out.. then there was a spark

    I think it's silly to get upset over it, 'sparks' happen in films, we all want it in real life too, the first kiss and you know he/she is the one.. but it's more than that in reality.

    I guess try getting hold of him and explaining it to him, or simply leave him be and find someone else you like.
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    (Original post by luce20)
    Tried to call him which he just cancelled on me, txt him and then sent a msg to a friend who is in the same class to pass on cause at that point he wasn't replying to anything. I can't do much more when I'm constantly being ignored.

    Edit: I just remembered something he said, if anything kicks off with family/friends, he sulks for quite some time. Like I said, I'll leave him to get on with it.
    Well it seems like you've done your bit, but seeing he's not responding to it, I'd say leave it. Maybe let the dust settle and try one more time in a week or so. But for now, like you say, just leave it.
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    Ello Luce, had a look at this one, and to be blunt, I have to agree with the lack of confidence and / or maturity on the guys part.

    It may just be he is really into you, but when he realised that there was no spark, well, some guys don't take rejection to well.

    So my best advice from this self confessed daft and cuddly Scotsman is to leave him be, at some point on life's journey, you will cross paths again and laugh the whole thing off as a lost opportunity!

    Sending you a virtual hug fae Aberdeen!
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    (Original post by AbzWayne)
    Ello Luce, had a look at this one, and to be blunt, I have to agree with the lack of confidence and / or maturity on the guys part.

    It may just be he is really into you, but when he realised that there was no spark, well, some guys don't take rejection to well.

    So my best advice from this self confessed daft and cuddly Scotsman is to leave him be, at some point on life's journey, you will cross paths again and laugh the whole thing off as a lost opportunity!

    Sending you a virtual hug fae Aberdeen!
    Oh ta very much!! You've made me feel a little better with that virtual hug.
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    (Original post by luce20)
    Guys mainly...would love your opinion. Been seeing this guy for the past three weeks, taking it slow, only had a first kiss yesterday, however for me there was no spark and I was honest and said that despite really liking the guy I couldn't understand why there was no spark. Fast forward to today, hes now completely blocked me on fb, won't have nothing to do with me.

    This is a guy who with I have developed a close friendship since last september, only see during college, 6 hours a week and hes reacted like this??

    Any ideas becasue hes treating me like i've cheated on him several times for years on end (bear in mind we both late-ish 20's) so its not like we immature teenagers who have just ended their first relationship. Shall I just leave him to it?
    Maybe he read this post.
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    http://asset.soup.io/asset/1578/9073_3921.jpeg
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    (Original post by luce20)
    I think I had built it up in my head so much and with my last ex the spark was there so maybe expectations were too high...how long before you really felt something with this guy can I ask?
    Everyone is different I guess, and feelings build up differently from person to person, no love will ever be the same, and in reality that's a good thing.

    I'm not really sure how long it took me to actually feel something for him, maybe a month after the kiss? Bare in mind he was my first love too, even though I has relationships before, I never loved anyone so maybe it took awhile to develop those lovey dovey emotions for me as I never felt them before with anyone even when waiting for that spark to happen, it often never did, not even close.

    I thing this spark thing is a wonderful concept but I doubt it happens that often, I dream of it happening to me, but I would be happy just waiting and playing it out like I did with my last ex

    Don't worry about you not feeling it, even if you end up with that same guy again, give it a try if you want it to. You never know what may happen in a few months. If nothing happens, just end it (although it may be hard if the person has developed feelings for you, but at least it won't hurt you).
 
 
 
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