How much did your parents impact upon your decision for your career/degree?

I'm just curious about this.

Everyone's heard of the ridiculous "all Asian parents want their kids to be doctors" stereotype (which does have its roots in fact, from what I've seen, but it's certainly not true for everyone), and that most people consider things like medicine, architecture, law, engineering, et al to be the "top" professions, since they're generally the most well-paid.

Personally, my parents haven't impacted on my choice at all. I want to study medicine, but my mother's had literally no input on the matter, and my father wants me to study something like economics or finance at university.

So, the question is basically the title: did your parents impact upon your decision? If so, how did they do that, and do you wish that you'd have more freedom to choose?

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Reply 1

ibysaiyan

Asian(M.E) parents yet my decision over what degree/career path to choose was long made.Back when I was a child,watching documentaries.
So partially it goes to them.

Reply 2

DiZZeeKiD

None at all. They would support me if I wanted to be a lawyer or a porn star. Probably not as much for the latter, but you get my point.

Reply 3

Smelly Ellie

My parents never influenced my decision, but now if I turned around and said I didn't want to be a vet any more they would be gutted.

Reply 4

Molokai

Neither of my parents graduated from uni (my mum went to nursing college and my dad started studying physics but dropped out after a year) so they were just happy I wanted to go.
My mother's family on a whole is full of doctors, so I decided as a rebellious teenager that I definitely didn't want to do medicine :biggrin:

the fact I also hate maths and physics played a big part in that decision too though

Reply 5

LtCommanderData

My dad suggested many times that he wanted me to do physics. He's not a physicist or anything, and to be fair I was considering it - but he was always in favour of that over computer science.

Come to think of it, my grandmother and my great-grandmother also told me to do physics rather than computer science!

Reply 6

oh-bang

My parents didn't influence my decision at all, they just said they were 'happy' as long as I was doing something I wanted to do and was happy.
It unfair when parents push their kids to do something/go somehwere.
I have several friends whos parents wouldnt let them go to university outside of Northern Ireland!!

Reply 7

Baula

My parents were happy to go along with whatever my decision was. I'm doing Eng Lit now but wanted to carry on with Media originally as I was thinking about a career in advertising and enjoyed creating media products last year.
Anyway, they were supportive but at the same time they were trying to sway me from it (which obviously worked) by discussing the pros and cons of each as I was umming and arring about both.

So yeah, ultimately it was my decision but they did influence it a bit.

Reply 8

The Polar Dude

my father wanted to become a doctor and i felt sorry for him coz he was in his late 20's when he came to england and he wasnt allowed to study med

i think that kinda kick-started the thoughts in my head of wanting to study medicine. In a sense of, if he cant do it, then ill do it for him, to make him proud.

of course, other factors have influenced my career decision :tongue:

Reply 9

infernalcradle

Iraqi parents.....

my mum wants me to be a lawyer and has spent the last 3yrs trying to stop me doing medicine (she even said she wouldn't mind me taking a gap year if I chose to do law :eek:

)

my dad isn't bothered...as long as I want to do it and its something he can boast about to his friends, he is happy :biggrin:

EDIT: why the neg?

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 10

Willum Infanta

I've always loved music but didn't know about the course I'm on until my mum told me I should check it out...I owe her for that I guess.

I'd otherwise probably be doing Engineering :erm:

Reply 11

anoif_

I'd like to say they've had no impact on my choice to study Law but I'm pretty sure my Mum didn't encourage me to watch Ally McBeal/The Practice/LA Law with her for no reason from about the age of 5 :p:

Having said this, my Dad has no qualifications at all and my Mum has two A Levels but it's never stopped them encouraging me to think I could be whatever I wanted to be. In that respect, I think they've probably had an input in my willingness to work hard and believe in myself :smile:

Reply 12

agolati

My parents didn't have a single hope for me until I got my GCSE results. I was an underachiever all my life before I actually decided to try hard. They didn't really get a say, it was my GCSE's that changed everything for me and made me pick my own career path.

Reply 13

cjcw20

No impact at all. My mum just wants me to get a degree because it would be a 'waste' if I didnt, apparently. My dad says nothing at all when it comes to my education... he just expects me to do well 'cause I always have.

Reply 14

bethnal_green

None at all.

Mum wanted me to study medicine (though I'm not Asian :biggrin:

) When I stated that it was the last thing I want to study, she opted for Business... I have now firmed my politics and international relations offer from York!

Dad is happy with whatever makes me happy :smile:

Reply 15

Lamptastic

None at all, they're happy as long as I'm happy.

They trust I'll make the right decision with my future so they let me be. :smile:

Reply 16

Lintu93

Not much - but my Dad dissaproves of my course choice. He did maths, physics & chemistry at university ( :eek:

) and practically chose my (mostly science) A-levels for me - he's now absolutely gutted (and rather angry) that I'm aiming for Philosophy & Politics.

Reply 17

un-besito

I am Asian and my parents haven't influenced my decision at all.
They made some suggestions, but they were all variations of the course I'd already decided to do (i.e. my dad suggested international relations with Spanish instead of doing the two languages) but they'd never pressure me into doing anything I don't want to. And I wouldn't give in, even if they tried, it's my life/future!

Reply 18

lessthan0

Original post by oh-bang

I really wanted to go away (and now have). Whilst my mum knew she couldn't say "don't go to Oxford" she was adamant that my insurance choice should be QUB "just in case" I changed my mind and didn't want to leave.

In terms of course, they steered me away from Politics A Level and onto Physics, without which I wouldn't be doing the course I am now, but I think any effect they had was just to keep me from changing my life direction on a whim.

5th Year me was pretty impressed with journalism, me now would hate not to be doing engineering. :biggrin:

Reply 19

TwilightKnight

I haven't spoken to my Mum in years, but my Dad didn't have much influence at all in making my decision to do Medicine.

However, he was a bit over enthusiastic about it once I decided to do it, since my Grandma had wanted a Medic in the family (she used to be a Nurse and had wanted her sons to be Doctors. I think a lot of that stems from her era when Doctors were much more respected than they are today, and also because she had respect for them as a nurse).

When it was looking this year like I wasn't going to get into Medicine after having 2 rejections, I started making plans to do Maths instead next year and got genuinely excited about it as both a course and a way into GEM, when I suddenly got the opportunity to do Medicine. I made a joke after getting the offer that I was still considering doing Maths and my Dad was like "No you aren't. Medicine is your dream". Which seemed a little weird, being told what my dream was. He was right, but I never explicitly said that to anyone.

TL;DR: No, he didn't have much influence on my decision, but he would be upset now if I said "I didn't want to do it". I think most parents would be though.