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Girls approaching guys watch

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    So guys what would you think if it was the girl who made the first move and came over to talk to you in a bar/club, would you think she was just desperate?

    Also, how would you want her to do it, i.e. what things to say?
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    Can I suck your ****? You're so ****ing hot.

    I want you in me.
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    Up for it are the first three words that would cross my mind
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    Seriously.

    Oh, and not just so i come across as wanting only a slutty, one night stand thing, i already know how to do that
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    I don't know. If there was a reason for her coming up to speak to me, then fine. Otherwise, I'd think it was a bit of a breach of established social etiquette. I'd also assume she probably does that sort of thing a lot. I wouldn't set things off on a good footing.

    A smile across a bar or something is far more appropriate.

    Also, how would you want her to do it, i.e. what things to say?
    I'm afraid if you're going to act like a man, you're going to be presented with the same problems that we are. Good small talk etc is a skill - if you don't have it, then you've just got to do a bit of practical work.
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    (Original post by L i b)
    I don't know. If there was a reason for her coming up to speak to me, then fine. Otherwise, I'd think it was a bit of a breach of established social etiquette. I'd also assume she probably does that sort of thing a lot. I wouldn't set things off on a good footing.

    A smile across a bar or something is far more appropriate.
    You serious
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    (Original post by Lexi99)
    Seriously.

    Oh, and not just so i come across as wanting only a slutty, one night stand thing, i already know how to do that
    We'd know that if you're coming to us then you've had that experience. That would mean that if we wanted a short term fling it wouldn't matter what you said, if we wanted something long term you'd be less attractive.

    Broadly speaking, I find it a turn off if women chase me. It's better to use subtle methods. Looking at a guy, winking at a guy, making eye love with a guy, something that reveals he should come to you.

    Edit. If we want you for something short term it doesn't matter much what you say. Your looks are our main determinant of our attractiveness to you. You could go for the super flirty 'come dance with me'.
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    (Original post by L i b)
    I don't know. If there was a reason for her coming up to speak to me, then fine. Otherwise, I'd think it was a bit of a breach of established social etiquette. I'd also assume she probably does that sort of thing a lot. I wouldn't set things off on a good footing.

    A smile across a bar or something is far more appropriate.



    I'm afraid if you're going to act like a man, you're going to be presented with the same problems that we are. Good small talk etc is a skill - if you don't have it, then you've just got to do a bit of practical work.
    A smile across a bar is weird and creepy. Approaching is far more normal.

    Anyway, perfectly happy for a girl to approach me. I don't see a problem with it, unlike this poster I have quoted, who has put unnecessary, pointless obstacles in the way.
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    Unlike others here I wouldn't be second guessing it.

    If you came over to me I'd engage you in conversation, I'd be wary that you were after something, or drunk, but beyond that would take things at face value.


    However, the fact that it never happens negates me from taking it too seriously.
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    See guys this is why girls will never approach guys....EVER!


    First response was from a virgin who has probably passed out by now at the thought of sex
    Then two normal people saying they think the girl does it on the regular and that is off-putting
    Then another saying he likes to chase
    And then another saying he would be suspicious




    /Sigh
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    (Original post by Miu-Miu)
    See guys this is why girls will never approach guys....EVER!


    First response was from a virgin who has probably passed out by now at the thought of sex
    Then two normal people saying they think the girl does it on the regular and that is off-putting
    Then another saying he likes to chase
    And then another saying he would be suspicious

    /Sigh
    Well seeing as for 99% of guys it doesn't ever happen anyway, I don't think we're actually missing out on anything by being sceptical.
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    Girls cannot win.

    On the one hand, when girls say they want guys to approach them, the pansy-ass guys start whining about how "it's always down to them" and they love "confident girls" and it's unfair what society expects from them in this regard.

    Then someone makes a thread about how a guy would like to be approached, and all of a sudden it's "uhh I don't know I think she'd be after something" or "it's weird" or "lol slut."

    Jesus.
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    Ah ok. A few weeks ago at a gig, a girl came over to me and said my friend wants to talk to you, but he's too shy etc etc, i was also too shy to go over to him despite having full knowledge he wouldnt have minded (aaah whats wrong with me?!).

    At the end of the gig i finally got up the courage to do it but they had already left. Now im going to a festival/weekender in the summer and i know the friend will be there so he just might as well, but i know the same thing will happen, i'll just be too shy to approach him, and i dont wanna go up the friend and get her to set us up cos that just seems really childish and gay.

    Also im always trying the eye contact across the bar thing but thats only worked a few times
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    (Original post by Miu-Miu)
    See guys this is why girls will never approach guys....EVER!


    First response was from a virgin who has probably passed out by now at the thought of sex
    Then two normal people saying they think the girl does it on the regular and that is off-putting
    Then another saying he likes to chase
    And then another saying he would be suspicious




    /Sigh
    :rolleyes: IMO it's perfectly normal, it's the 21st century for Christ sakes.
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    (Original post by Lexi99)
    Ah ok. A few weeks ago at a gig, a girl came over to me and said my friend wants to talk to you, but he's too shy etc etc, i was also too shy to go over to him despite having full knowledge he wouldnt have minded (aaah whats wrong with me?!).

    At the end of the gig i finally got up the courage to do it but they had already left. Now im going to a festival/weekender in the summer and i know the friend will be there so he just might as well, but i know the same thing will happen, i'll just be too shy to approach him, and i dont wanna go up the friend and get her to set us up cos that just seems really childish and gay.

    Also im always trying the eye contact across the bar thing but thats only worked a few times
    Try sending notes by friends making witty comments.

    Or, gesturing for him to come.

    Anything that allows him to take the initiative will lessen the effect of people not liking approaching girls.

    Or you could go sit next to him and be all coy.
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    (Original post by Miu-Miu)
    See guys this is why girls will never approach guys....EVER!


    First response was from a virgin who has probably passed out by now at the thought of sex
    Then two normal people saying they think the girl does it on the regular and that is off-putting
    Then another saying he likes to chase
    And then another saying he would be suspicious




    /Sigh
    I think it's normal :itsme:
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    (Original post by Lexi99)
    would you think she was just desperate?
    I would be slightly amazed.
    EDIT : On reflection. time and place would have an effect.

    (Original post by L i b)
    established social etiquette.
    Lol. **** that ****.
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    Good for a shag, not much else.
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    If he's incredibly shy he may not care about you being forward. Not all people care about the rules of dating.

    Those rules are there for a reason. In this case they'd be right, the person has had slutty one night stands. But he may not know that.
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    (Original post by Lexi99)
    So guys what would you think if it was the girl who made the first move and came over to talk to you in a bar/club, would you think she was just desperate?

    Also, how would you want her to do it, i.e. what things to say?
    I would just say hello in return.

    Really, all you are doing is going up to somebody and talking to them - surely this is what happens at any work or business-related function or meetup anyway?

    Why would it be assumed you were 'desperate'. After all - if you were speaking to a complete strange who knew nothing about you, surely they would be in no position to evaluate?
 
 
 
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