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How to "avoid" someone/spend less time with them without being obvious? Watch

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    I'll keep this as short as possible. I like a girl at work but she got a boyfriend two weeks ago. Feel like crap but I'll get over it. The problem is, the only way I know I can get over her is to "avoid" her/spend less time with her/talk to her less. And the further problem is I am quite close to this girl, we always talk when we worked together, we chat on facebook, we text each other, and occasionally have nights out together (with other people from work, we are all of a similar age). So going from being in contact to barely is something that I am not sure how to do without making it obvious.

    We work together twice a week, so it isn't like I see her everyday. But this week I only said two things to her in a four hour shift, "hi" when I saw her, and "yea" with a half smile when she said she was bored. Other than that I didn't speak to her because I didn't know what to say without making it obvious that I was hurting over missing out. I didn't think she was bothered, or that anyone had noticed, but today a girl who worked the same shift asked me why I "avoided" the girl in question all shift. She said you can normally not split us apart because we talk a lot, and I always help her with stuff; but on Friday you avoided her and spent barely any time in the same place as her and looked awkward when you where in the same place. I laughed it off and said, "I wasn't avoiding her, I was simply getting the delivery out so we weren't late going home".

    Perhaps I acted childish on that day, I probably won't do the same the next time we work together. But the problem still remains on how to get over her without making it obvious, and to be honest I don't want to repeat what I did last week. I do want to be able to talk and be normal around her and not awkward. So does any have any advice on how can I "avoid"/spend less time with/talk less to them without it being obvious?

    Thanks
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    From experience I can tell you avoiding them never works.

    You'll get over it within time, and just be genuine friends.
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    'I can't come out tonight, I'm washing my hair.'

    Seriously: Just bite your tongue and get over it. She's going to think you'd make such a better boyfriend when you're avoiding her, isn't she?
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    If i were her i'd like you to be honest and tell her how you feel. I doubt she had NO feelings for you whatsoever and she may not think you liked her before she got a boyfriend. It's a new relationship and if you wanted to be with her it may not be too late to tell her coz you never know she could have felt the same!
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    boyfriends arent forever most likely they're gonna break up soon and your gonna be the guy there for her.. she'll need you & who knows, things may blossom into something.
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    (Original post by kaylafrances)
    If i were her i'd like you to be honest and tell her how you feel. I doubt she had NO feelings for you whatsoever and she may not think you liked her before she got a boyfriend. It's a new relationship and if you wanted to be with her it may not be too late to tell her coz you never know she could have felt the same!
    I have debated telling her how I feel, it would be a lot easier for me to get it off my chest. But if she didn't feel the same way, I have a fear of making things awkward between us. I guess it is a risk I'd have to take if I want her...

    (Original post by becilouise)
    boyfriends arent forever most likely they're gonna break up soon and your gonna be the guy there for her.. she'll need you & who knows, things may blossom into something.
    I suppose that's a good point, and probably better to be a friend towards her than not, regardless of what happens.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)

    I suppose that's a good point, and probably better to be a friend towards her than not, regardless of what happens.
    Yeah, i had a guy friend who recently confessed his feelings for me. Although i didnt feel the same, i love him as a brother, it was really flattering but it hasnt made things awkward, if anything its made us more close. he's always there for me, and i appreciate that. Just be there for her, its all you can do if you want something to happen.
 
 
 
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