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virginity... watch

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    Ill keep this short. This isn't the usual, omgzz I I so uglyz! Boyz neverr look at me!! Thread.

    Basically, I used to be as picky as ****. Over the past year aand a half 3 guys have asked me out, but I've rejected them all justt because I'm so picky. I think I'm looking for a guy that doesn't even exist :/ but then again I don't want to settle...

    I'm 20 soon and want to lose my vplates before I hit the big 2-0. There's this guy who told me that he loved me before and I think he wld be interested in a one night sttand sort of thing...how cringe! But I don't really know how to initiate it, I don't really see him about and about anymore :/ so I'd have to start it over txt or whatever. Blehh. This is definitely the weirdest thread I've posted here!

    Helppp!!!i
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    You are a horrible person.

    ONS with a guy who loves you? You appear to have the empathy of a shoe.
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    After reading that post; you don't deserve to lose your virginity.
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    Stop being a stupid cow.
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    You're a woman that wants to lose virginity on ONS? :curious:

    I've got a list of desperate men that would be willing to help :rolleyes:

    Unless of course you're ugly in which case consult list B



    But on a more serious note: Don't ONS with a guy that 'loves' you.. that'll only mess him up and earn you the title of **** :rolleyes:
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    People like you deserve to be disemboweled with a rusty crowbar!

    P.S Can anybody tell me how to view people's signatures on posts?
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    Here's an article that appeared in the Gaudie, the Aberdeen Uni newspaper, a few months ago.

    The concept of sexual novelty, especially among the females of our society, has been idealized and glorified to levels of disproportionate importance in our social scheme, to the point of having it be a fulcrum for important social events, such as marriage or filial liberties. Why is it that a person’s private past sexual encounters has more of an impact on their social status? Where does the stigma attached to virginity come from?
    In a historical context, the importance of virginity has undulated in parallel with the pervasiveness of religion in society. This may simply be a coincidence due to the general trend of archaic worldviews being strongly correlated to religiosity, however, and the real reason for virginal pressure probably lies deeper within human psychopathology. So is it biological? Perhaps virginity is desirable for its evolutionary advantages, such as a reassurance against STDs. However, the absence of instinctive methods to ascertain virginity among human beings (and animals, for that matter) constitutes a pretty solid reason for discarding any biological imperative as a reason. While it is true that depucelation will cause the hymen to break and consequently blood to flow, it is more often the case that the hymen breaks for unrelated reasons long before the revelatory intercourse takes place. The importance of virginity must, in that case, come from a purely anthropocentric source.
    And here, of course, is the elephant in the room- namely the perception of virginity and its implied values as societal and interpersonal dynamics. The notion that sexual inexperience is in any way preferable – terms like purity, chastity, and the like all having positive rather than negative connotations in language – and that by engaging in sexual activities one is somehow sullying or tainting oneself is, and I doubt anyone will disagree with me, rather absurd. It may seem like a relatively innocent thing- no father enjoys imagining his daughter in a dorm room somewhere re-enacting the content of James Joyce’s letters to Nora Barnacle. Yet the root of the problem is far more sinister, and the consequences far more damaging than merely an angry dad chasing a boyfriend out of the house. It becomes a power play, a way to control, assimilated by the religious, the conservatives, and the “family values” nutjobs- people whose utopia is built upon the shoulders of Archie Bunker, Ronald Reagan and Joel Osteen.
    The biggest problem facing these people is the pure and simple fact that teenagers will eventually pop their cherries. With that as a given, the drive to maintain virginity needs to shift gears from “wishful thinking” to “scare the bejesus out of ‘em”. This is especially prevalent in the more religious areas (think the American Bible Belt), and is done via a deliberate feeding of misinformation and moral intimidation. STDs are used as an excuse to impress upon teenagers the dangers of promiscuity, conveniently overlooking the medical advances in today’s world that permit this sort of behaviour safely. “Abstinence only”, goes the choir, and impressionable teens fall for it hook, line and sinker. Even the media gets on board with it, with Disney teen sensations like the Jonas Brothers sporting so-called ‘purity rings’. The result of all this, however, is widespread ignorance about methods of contraception and effective protection from STDs- or, if one looks at the statistics (which you can google yourself should you doubt me), significantly higher rates of teen pregnancy and sexually related diseases among the more religious swathes of the advanced world.
    The problem, however, in my opinion, goes deeper still. It is my contention that the moral value assigned to female virginity is nothing more than the projection of male insecurity and sexual jealousy, designed to limit and encroach upon the sexual liberties, rights and freedoms of women worldwide. By giving the absence of sexual experience a positive value, one is assigning a negative value to its presence. Sex has always been a rather taboo subject, seen as something unfit for decorous company and discussion, if not outright dirty and a cause of shame. Yet I find it utterly perverse that this be the treatment awarded to an activity that is not only medically healthy, but contains immense philanthropic value as being the most intimate, generous, loving and pleasurable activity two human beings can engage in together. It is a beautiful ability that evolution has endowed us with. Leave it to humanity to screw it up.
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    Just ask him if he wants to go out. During the "date" give him hints that you want to do it. Unless he's completely oblivious he'll get it. Then, hopefully, stuff will happen...
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    You should die a virgin. It's terrible how you want a one night stand with a guy who clearly has emotions for you.
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    I think some of you are looking at this a bit one-sidedly.

    Yes it would be a bad idea to have a ONS with someone who used to at least have feelings for you. but... it's hardly the worst thing ever.... I mean have you never looked back and thought what was I thinking. I hate to use the word desperation but I can't think of a better word. But when people are desperate they often don't think things through properly or from another angle.

    I think most of you have ironically been shown pretty little empathy in pointing out that it would be a bad idea.

    You could've pointed out that it was a bad idea and comforted the poor lass and assured her that there is nothing wrong with being a virgin and that the right guy will show up soon enough.


    to anon:
    Most guys don't mind being with a sexually inexperienced girl, you shouldn't worry about it; it gives them confidence in the bedroom which is a good feeling when the guy isn't very confident. They know the sex will get better

    Don't do something you know you will regret. Mr right will turn in sooner rather than later. If you like this guy who told you he loves you why not ask to meet up with him. Also don't be afraid of being in a relationship with somebody who is less than perfect.
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    Well certainly don't lose your virginity to him. It isn't fair on him if he bears feelings to you but you don't feel the same way: that would be manipulative. In the same way that a guy who has sex with a woman who cares for him (but whom he doesn't have similar feelings for) in a ONS would be frowned upon (at least in this society), you would be as well. In fact, I can't see a guy posting this topic and getting much positive encouragement at all, so have a think about that.

    If you're going to do this, do it with someone who is on the same terms as you.
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    Would you like my number :-)




    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Ill keep this short. This isn't the usual, omgzz I I so uglyz! Boyz neverr look at me!! Thread.

    Basically, I used to be as picky as ****. Over the past year aand a half 3 guys have asked me out, but I've rejected them all justt because I'm so picky. I think I'm looking for a guy that doesn't even exist :/ but then again I don't want to settle...

    I'm 20 soon and want to lose my vplates before I hit the big 2-0. There's this guy who told me that he loved me before and I think he wld be interested in a one night sttand sort of thing...how cringe! But I don't really know how to initiate it, I don't really see him about and about anymore :/ so I'd have to start it over txt or whatever. Blehh. This is definitely the weirdest thread I've posted here!

    Helppp!!!i
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Ill keep this short. This isn't the usual, omgzz I I so uglyz! Boyz neverr look at me!! Thread.

    Basically, I used to be as picky as ****. Over the past year aand a half 3 guys have asked me out, but I've rejected them all justt because I'm so picky. I think I'm looking for a guy that doesn't even exist :/ but then again I don't want to settle...

    I'm 20 soon and want to lose my vplates before I hit the big 2-0. There's this guy who told me that he loved me before and I think he wld be interested in a one night sttand sort of thing...how cringe! But I don't really know how to initiate it, I don't really see him about and about anymore :/ so I'd have to start it over txt or whatever. Blehh. This is definitely the weirdest thread I've posted here!

    Helppp!!!i

    First of all, you NEED to improve your self-esteem! One guy tells you he loves you and BAM you want him to take your virginity?
    Why do you feel pressured at losing your virginity before 20? If you haven't met the right person yet, don't settle! This is a very significant event in every girl's life, so don't let it be a horrible memory that you'll have to live with or later regret.
    Secondly, your virginity doesn't define what kind of person you are! Don't succumb to peer pressure and do something you're obviously not ready to do. And again, wait for someone who actually DESERVES to share this moment with you.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Ill keep this short. This isn't the usual, omgzz I I so uglyz! Boyz neverr look at me!! Thread.

    Basically, I used to be as picky as ****. Over the past year aand a half 3 guys have asked me out, but I've rejected them all justt because I'm so picky. I think I'm looking for a guy that doesn't even exist :/ but then again I don't want to settle...

    I'm 20 soon and want to lose my vplates before I hit the big 2-0. There's this guy who told me that he loved me before and I think he wld be interested in a one night sttand sort of thing...how cringe! But I don't really know how to initiate it, I don't really see him about and about anymore :/ so I'd have to start it over txt or whatever. Blehh. This is definitely the weirdest thread I've posted here!

    Helppp!!!i
    YOu want to lose virginity from a ONS??? Thats odd coming from a girl..
    And more odd is the fact that you want an ONS from a guy who likes you...

    Anyways, i think you should initiate ONS with a guy who wants the same thing..
 
 
 
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