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Obsessive Boyfriend watch

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    I always knew he had little quirks. He has a calendar that he writes what he did every day in and when we first started going out he used to put little s's to mark when we had sex. When I found out I told him it was a bit weird and he stopped. But since we've been in third year of uni, his quirks have gone to a whole new level, something that I suspect has stemmed from a huge amount of work and stress.

    He plans his day to the smallest degree and has a huge to do list. He checks bbc news and sports websites religiously each morning and night, recording what he wants to know the result of and then spending a great deal of time reading up on what's happened, even in sports he doesn't really follow. He also checks the tv guide to write down what he wants to watch the next day. He can't rest until things are done and he seems to be constantly playing over in his mind what he has left to do and what his plan for today or the next day is. He's also a bit obsessive about a game on facebook which he plays on every day.

    If something disrupts his plans then he can't handle it. We woke up yesterday morning feeling horny and were having sex but half way through he lost his erection. When he eventually decided to talk about it, he said he had been stressing that he wouldn't have enough time to do what he'd planned and that the sex had messed up his sort of schedule. Although to be fair, he was due to catch a coach to go on holiday in a couple of hours. But I still don't think that's how a normal person would react.

    I should make clear that this is NOT what he's always like. Usually just when stressed. But the rest of the things I mentioned above, he does religiously every day. If for some reason he can't do them, like he's on a night out or on holiday, he doesn't mind too much but he will catch up when he gets home. But i feel like it's affecting our relationship and I felt really rejected after yesterday morning. He knows his little obsessions bother me so there's not much point in talking to him. I don't think it's worth him seeing a therapist or whatever because it's not anything like OCD, it's just something he likes to do to calm him down and be in control i think. It's just getting a little out of hand. Can anyone help?
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    Sounds like it could be OCD if it's something he does compulsively to calm him down. I don't think therapy would be too bad an idea since it's interfering with him being able to function normally and if he's having such an extreme reaction to disruption of his schedule and things.
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    You have one weird boyfriend.
    But if that's the way he rolls, I don't think you can do that much.
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    if he has these habits that are so entrenched then you'll have to deal with them. they don't seem all that bad to me anyway. just try to look past them, if you do that, sooner or later his strange habits won't seem that significant.
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    support him through it. when obsessive people lose their loved ones when theyre peeking, they break down.
    all the best! x
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I always knew he had little quirks. He has a calendar that he writes what he did every day in and when we first started going out he used to put little s's to mark when we had sex. When I found out I told him it was a bit weird and he stopped. But since we've been in third year of uni, his quirks have gone to a whole new level, something that I suspect has stemmed from a huge amount of work and stress.

    He plans his day to the smallest degree and has a huge to do list. He checks bbc news and sports websites religiously each morning and night, recording what he wants to know the result of and then spending a great deal of time reading up on what's happened, even in sports he doesn't really follow. He also checks the tv guide to write down what he wants to watch the next day. He can't rest until things are done and he seems to be constantly playing over in his mind what he has left to do and what his plan for today or the next day is. He's also a bit obsessive about a game on facebook which he plays on every day.

    If something disrupts his plans then he can't handle it. We woke up yesterday morning feeling horny and were having sex but half way through he lost his erection. When he eventually decided to talk about it, he said he had been stressing that he wouldn't have enough time to do what he'd planned and that the sex had messed up his sort of schedule. Although to be fair, he was due to catch a coach to go on holiday in a couple of hours. But I still don't think that's how a normal person would react.

    I should make clear that this is NOT what he's always like. Usually just when stressed. But the rest of the things I mentioned above, he does religiously every day. If for some reason he can't do them, like he's on a night out or on holiday, he doesn't mind too much but he will catch up when he gets home. But i feel like it's affecting our relationship and I felt really rejected after yesterday morning. He knows his little obsessions bother me so there's not much point in talking to him. I don't think it's worth him seeing a therapist or whatever because it's not anything like OCD, it's just something he likes to do to calm him down and be in control i think. It's just getting a little out of hand. Can anyone help?
    I wonder if there are aspects of Asperger's in there ,particularly related to the need for order?
    • #2
    #2

    An obsessive compulsive disorder is performing tasks which stop you from getting on with your life and interrupt that pattern. Besides people who have OCD will be under enormous amount of stress until they do what they intended to do. Does he look like he can’t wait to get home and perform those rituals such as facebook games or website checking or is he laid back when you’re out? I do see a hint of OCD and besides unless you’re spending 100% of the time with him, you may not be noticing certain rituals he may be performing? I would suggest that he needs to discuss this before it gets out of hand.
 
 
 
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