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Eating Disorders and life with one - Discussions, Opinions, Advice. watch

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    (Original post by diamonddust)
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    Are we actually the same person?! I feel almost the exact same way as you. Tired all the time, feeling like I'm wasting my uni time and getting triggered by the silliest things (you hit the nail on the hand with the whole- triggered because you want to be triggered so you have an excuse).
    I just feel like uni has made everything so much harder. But I guess that that's life. It gets harder and we just have to deal, no matter how hard it is to adjust.
    RE friend 2- I'm calling BS. She may have had some body image issues and intermittent restricting but I really doubt she was ever anorexic. I'm sure that someone's going to prove me wrong but you can't just 'snap out of' an ED. It's a deep-rooted problem and a mental illness FGS!
    Awww, my BFF goes to the same uni as you (a year above) and I just want to call her and say hey- look out for this girl!
    Spoiled for triggers
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    I feel like I can't go back into treatment (I was OP, due to a lack of beds) at this weight. I just feel like I would be laughed at. This stupid medication has made me gain so much weight that I feel like I'm not a real sufferer anymore. I used to *look* anorexic, but now I feel like a fraud.
    Also, I binged and purged last night. I have never binged in my life and I don't know why I did it but I ate so much and then I had to purge. The worst thing is, it was so comforting to know that I still could purge, like it's an old friend somehow. I purged last night and some sick part of me was proud that I'd managed to slip back into that habit. And now all I can think of is doing it again.
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    (Original post by Riku)
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    This, just this. I might print this out and stick it on my pinboard.
    • #37
    #37

    Today I was discharged. I feel scared, aphrensive but healthy and a lot more happier. I don't feel rid of this, but I can try to manage it.

    The posts here have recently been quite negative. Don't stop trying your all beautiful
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    Is anybody else taking antidepressants and if so, did it make recovery easier? I've just started them but hate the side effects so much I want to come off!
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    I had my appointment and weigh-in today and I am very, very happy. I gained. The thing I'm happiest about the most is I wasn't awash with an immediate feeling of self-hatred, regret and guilt. I knew I was aiming to put on..and I did. It was still an amount I was comfortable with and I was proud that I'd done it. There was a time when the idea of feeling happy at seeing my weight go up seemed utterly incomprehensible to me - but it's happened! Onwards and upwards. There really IS more to life if you allow there to be.
    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by x-Disenchanted-x)
    Is anybody else taking antidepressants and if so, did it make recovery easier? I've just started them but hate the side effects so much I want to come off!
    Please stick with it Dis-Dis, I personally am still on Fluoxetine, Olanzepine, and a few others. For the first fortnight, it was a nightmare. I always seem to get every side effect on the side of the box.

    But after that initial period, things got a LOT better.


    PS, Melissa, your comment warmed my heart. Even though your focus is still on weight and numbers, at least we are using that drive to strive to better ourselves as opposed to destroy.

    You're the best, M-J. X
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    (Original post by TotoMimo)
    Please stick with it Dis-Dis, I personally am still on Fluoxetine, Olanzepine, and a few others. For the first fortnight, it was a nightmare. I always seem to get every side effect on the side of the box.

    But after that initial period, things got a LOT better.


    PS, Melissa, your comment warmed my heart. Even though your focus is still on weight and numbers, at least we are using that drive to strive to better ourselves as opposed to destroy.

    You're the best, M-J. X
    The best around, nothings gonna ever keep you down!
    Thanks Tommy, that means a lot. And you're right, at this point in time, I'm using the numbers to my advantage in my recovery (gradually letting go off them though, I don't want this obsession forever.)

    It's a step by step process, you try and do too much, too fast and it all goes to pot. (I think UK budget politicians should take note of this also.) (sorry to get political, it always happens to me when Daily Politics is on haha)
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    (Original post by TotoMimo)
    Please stick with it Dis-Dis, I personally am still on Fluoxetine, Olanzepine, and a few others. For the first fortnight, it was a nightmare. I always seem to get every side effect on the side of the box.

    But after that initial period, things got a LOT better.


    PS, Melissa, your comment warmed my heart. Even though your focus is still on weight and numbers, at least we are using that drive to strive to better ourselves as opposed to destroy.

    You're the best, M-J. X
    Crickey toto! You sound like you have half the contents of the local pharmacy in your cupboard! If I were to pick you up and shake you, you'd rattle!
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    (Original post by TotoMimo)
    Please stick with it Dis-Dis, I personally am still on Fluoxetine, Olanzepine, and a few others. For the first fortnight, it was a nightmare. I always seem to get every side effect on the side of the box.

    But after that initial period, things got a LOT better.


    PS, Melissa, your comment warmed my heart. Even though your focus is still on weight and numbers, at least we are using that drive to strive to better ourselves as opposed to destroy.

    You're the best, M-J. X
    Thanks, I'll try and stick it out, it's just making me feel so numb! I can't even write at the moment because I can't connect with my creative work so I'm spending most of my time just staring at the TV.
    Hope all's going well for you, been reading your posts and you've come such a long way
    • #90
    #90

    Hi, i really need some advice, and i am not sure who i should go to. I know i'm not anorexic, but there is definitely something wrong with me. I have lost about 7kg in the last 4 months. But, my bmi is currrently 18.8, so i am still am a healthy weight. I know i have an abnormal obssession with food, and i have to count the calories of everything i eat. I get annoyed when i can't find how many calories certain foods are, and feel disgusting if i eat over abut 1200 calories a day. I don't eat a lot at school, and when people ask me why i have to say i'm not hungry or i don't feel well. i've stopped myself eating junk food..or at least try to.

    i know for a fact that i have lost weight, an my friends say so to. However, my parents have not said anything, (and they are the sort of people who do not realise weight is a sensitive issue) ,so surely, i could not have lost that much noticeable weight.

    i'm really scared, because i'm going to university next year, and i worried what i will do when i am in control of what i eat.

    i really need some advice, do you think this is serious? or am i simply over re-acting
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    Anonymous, you are seeking the power that the calorie content knowledge can give you. This is the precursor to ED behaviour, when you yearn to control all input and output of the caloric output of your life.

    These are the indicators you have an ED, but you are at the stages where you can actively fight against it!

    We are all strong, but when it comes to this kind of resistance, you must build a strength early.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi, i really need some advice, and i am not sure who i should go to. I know i'm not anorexic, but there is definitely something wrong with me. I have lost about 7kg in the last 4 months. But, my bmi is currrently 18.8, so i am still am a healthy weight. I know i have an abnormal obssession with food, and i have to count the calories of everything i eat. I get annoyed when i can't find how many calories certain foods are, and feel disgusting if i eat over abut 1200 calories a day. I don't eat a lot at school, and when people ask me why i have to say i'm not hungry or i don't feel well. i've stopped myself eating junk food..or at least try to.

    i know for a fact that i have lost weight, an my friends say so to. However, my parents have not said anything, (and they are the sort of people who do not realise weight is a sensitive issue) ,so surely, i could not have lost that much noticeable weight.

    i'm really scared, because i'm going to university next year, and i worried what i will do when i am in control of what i eat.

    i really need some advice, do you think this is serious? or am i simply over re-acting
    What Toto said, but also: I've been told it takes at least as long to recover from anorexia as it did to develop it. That's a bit of a ****ter for those of us that are now five years down the line, but if you've only started thinking like this over the last few weeks or months, you really should actively try to rethink your attitudes to food and calories before it gets too deeply engrained.
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    My 6yo cousin sister thinks shes fat...she's stick thin!
    Her older sister constantly calls her fat and she used to take it as a joke but now shes taking it seriously. It kills me coz I dont want her to end up in my position
    • Thread Starter
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    Truth is, a lot of comments are said in humour. Unfortunately for us, that's no option! We are a sensitive bunch and as such, the most basic of chocolate bars become a "deployment base" that others would deem a basic snack.
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    Is it bad I'm using protein shakes and nuts to curb cravings today? It's either that or the big bad binge : / not that I'm at the point of meal substitution -yet.
    Does anyone know how quick it's safe to drink them, I've just drank a bottle in 2 minutes oops...
    My sister's birthday party today-another tomorrow. That's two restaraunts in the same week, plus yesterday's binge. Hoenstly don't know how I'm gonna make it through all this
    Irony is I probably lose through losing sleep anyway-but lose in the wrong way. Hence the protein shake. Toto, that book ahs me down to a tee
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    (Original post by sarahmurphy532)
    I know this is a personal subject for you, and sorry to intrude with uni work but please would you all mind filling in my questionnaire for my 3rd year dissertation. I am looking into causes of eating disorders and with your help can hopefully find some good research to put forward and try and make a difference in helping ED'd people.

    Thanks so much!
    http://www.surveygizmo.com/s3/777704/Sarah-Murphy
    done.
    x
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    Today's been great.

    So far, so good
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    Appointment with nurse therapist today. He can't diagnose me but what I've described didn't come across to him as an eating disorder! Apparently I'm not at immediate risk anyway. The marked long-term anxieties around food and particularly the recent behaviours are still big enough to get treatment in the same way though, so seeing them again next week, thank God. x
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    Doctors appt on Tuesday morning - actually going to go this time

    :afraid:
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    (Original post by Cinnie)
    Doctors appt on Tuesday morning - actually going to go this time

    :afraid:
    Good

    I love you! :lovehug: xx
 
 
 
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