The Student Room Group

Eating Disorders and life with one - Discussions, Opinions, Advice.

Scroll to see replies

Reply 3420
Original post by TotoMimo
Riku, Belle, the pair of you are making me a happy wee clam!

Regarding "binges".
The ED tells us up is down, so we dig through the earth until our fingers bleed in search of the sun.


It's so cruel how the ED turns our mindset into one of 'I need to get away with allowing myself the absolute bare minimum, otherwise i'm greedy and it's just too much'. It's so deeply ingrained into all parts of our lives without even realising. Putting food into the context of life in general - why would we do that? Why have the bare minimum when we can have a balance and be happy.

Original post by sentiment
x!


Don't let it beat you. Remember that the massive determination and perfectionism that your ED has is derived from a part of your personality that can be used for amazing things instead. You've replaced the instinct that we all have inside us that is terrified of going without enough nutrition, with one that does the opposite. You can turn it around, and eventually genuinely feel that the thought of continually damaging your body is the most terrifying thing - more so than providing enough for it. xx
Reply 3421
Exams, stress and recovery don't make a happy pairing >.<

I know it's not strictly ED-related, but I cut for the first in two months today :frown:
Original post by Etoile
Exams, stress and recovery don't make a happy pairing >.<

I know it's not strictly ED-related, but I cut for the first in two months today :frown:


Two months is an amazing achievement :hugs: It sucks when you slip back into it (been cutting since I was 16... far too long) but a little slip up doesn't mean that you've failed or anything, it's just a bump and if you've been really stressed with exams and recovery then it's ok.

Spoiler

Reply 3423
Original post by Anonymous
Two months is an amazing achievement :hugs: It sucks when you slip back into it (been cutting since I was 16... far too long) but a little slip up doesn't mean that you've failed or anything, it's just a bump and if you've been really stressed with exams and recovery then it's ok.

Spoiler



Thanks :smile: I was doing so well! I'm supposed to be better! I'd just had two maths exams though and was getting ready for English. I feel like I've let everyone down :frown:
Original post by Etoile
Thanks :smile: I was doing so well! I'm supposed to be better! I'd just had two maths exams though and was getting ready for English. I feel like I've let everyone down :frown:


I can't speak for an eating disorder but recovery from self harm takes so much longer than 2 months, so don't put yourself down. It's a day by day process and we trip up sometimes but we make it most of the days and that's what matters. You need to focus on your exams and try to forget about this hiccup so you can do yourself justice and get the good grades you deserve x
Hi everyone. I'm anorexic and my parents are getting worried about me and are threatening hospitalisation. I don't really see the point. I am 5ft 9ins tall and weigh 105lbs. How dangerous is my weight? Thanks for your help!
(edited 11 years ago)
Reply 3426
Original post by Anonymous
I can't speak for an eating disorder but recovery from self harm takes so much longer than 2 months, so don't put yourself down. It's a day by day process and we trip up sometimes but we make it most of the days and that's what matters. You need to focus on your exams and try to forget about this hiccup so you can do yourself justice and get the good grades you deserve x


Yeah. Recovering from an ED is harder though I think, for me anyway, because it's more of my life? Thank you :smile: It was a really stupid thing to do because all in the exam I was thinking about how much it itched :L :hugs:
Original post by christmassy
Hi everyone. I'm anorexic and my parents are getting worried about me and are threatening hospitalisation. I don't really see the point. I am 5ft 9ins tall and weigh 105lbs. How dangerous is my weight? Thanks for your help!


very.
Original post by Etoile
Yeah. Recovering from an ED is harder though I think, for me anyway, because it's more of my life? Thank you :smile: It was a really stupid thing to do because all in the exam I was thinking about how much it itched :L :hugs:


Don't worry! I think around exam time we all become a bit dependent on stuff, even 'normal' people do. My boyfriend's appetite seems to have rocketed due to exams and I've become a Diet Coke addict, but it will all stop after exams and you'll be able to focus on getting better properly. When I was anorexic, I wanted to get better around the time of my AS Levels, but I couldn't because I was so stressed about the exams so I restricted myself. As soon as I'd finished my last exams, I held my hands up and was like 'mumma, feed me whatever'. Exams honestly just exacerbate mental problems :\ THEY'RE EVIL.

- - -

As you guys know, I've been recovered for 2 years. However, since getting better I never delved into my diaries and photos of the time that I had an ED.

Spoiler



Guys, if you read that...IMPOSSIBLE IS NOTHING. If you guys want to, you will get better. Please have faith and keep fighting. You are strong. You're a survivor and you will do it, all in good time. x
Reply 3429
Jazzy, inspiring. Really hit home with me too, because my bmi wasnt the lowest a human had ever been, but I had two weeks to live, tops, thanks to liver and kidney death. Yet I was still saying, "Hah, but Im not the smallest anorexic though!"

What a moron i was.
Original post by TotoMimo
Jazzy, inspiring. Really hit home with me too, because my bmi wasnt the lowest a human had ever been, but I had two weeks to live, tops, thanks to liver and kidney death. Yet I was still saying, "Hah, but Im not the smallest anorexic though!"

What a moron i was.


Thank you *hug*. I know what you mean. I still thought 'no, I need to lose more', even when I physically couldn't! I also feel ridiculously stupid, looking back on it. I keep thinking 'why the hell couldn't I have dealt with my issues in a better way?' because it didn't just destroy me, but it destroyed the people closest to me too. But as mumma said, we can't make up for it or rewrite history. All we can do is make a vow never to do it again and enjoy all the things that the ED temporarily stole from us. x
Original post by Etoile
Yeah. Recovering from an ED is harder though I think, for me anyway, because it's more of my life? Thank you :smile: It was a really stupid thing to do because all in the exam I was thinking about how much it itched :L :hugs:


-squidge- I swear exams make everything worse. Getting a massive 8 page letter/ booklet thing about results day, adjustment, what to do if you cant get on Track/ if you **** up all your exams and end up in clearing this morning hasnt helped. just made me feel like I'm not going to end up at my firm. Feel prepared for AS german resit. Do NOT feel prepared for chemistry. Nor does miss saying 'I can't imagine what it would be like to not like food, isn't it sad that some people hate food so much that they don't eat?' in bio this morning. Our prerelease material for my bio exam is on AN and the influence of the media along with an awful lot of other stuff.
Original post by .snowflake.
-squidge- I swear exams make everything worse. Getting a massive 8 page letter/ booklet thing about results day, adjustment, what to do if you cant get on Track/ if you **** up all your exams and end up in clearing this morning hasnt helped. just made me feel like I'm not going to end up at my firm. Feel prepared for AS german resit. Do NOT feel prepared for chemistry. Nor does miss saying 'I can't imagine what it would be like to not like food, isn't it sad that some people hate food so much that they don't eat?' in bio this morning. Our prerelease material for my bio exam is on AN and the influence of the media along with an awful lot of other stuff.


I'm guessing you do edexcel biology? I'm really freaking out about the article thing, I can't bring myself to read it again, and I'm pretty much not going to biology classes anymore after the horrific class discussions we've had (like people blurting out about how underweight they were, my biology class is weirdly thin and it always makes me feel like crap, and the person next to me talking about how it was so sad that girls felt the need to make themselves sick :s-smilie:). I can't believe edexcel thought it was appropriate to start an article with the word 'thinspiration'. I guess I'm over-sensitive to the whole thing but still, the last thing I need in an exam is thoughts about AN/BN/thinspo.
Reply 3433
We're all a bit stressed out right now with the exam season in full swing, and it's possible we're forgetting to breathe deeply and just letting all thoughts of fun and chilling out fly out the window. It's all too easy to say "I don't have time to look after myself now, "I have to revise for X/finish this dissertation first!" But life, for all of its beauty, is going to constantly throw stresses our way and the mark of self-esteem and strength of character is how we respond to those stresses without letting them consume us.
(Can probably guess I forgot to do this today big-time >_< but being mindful and aware of your thoughts and feelings is crucial to changing bad habits)
We might feel we should leave quality "me-time" out for now and concentrate because we've got the whole summer ahead to enjoy ourselves/focus on recovery, but really our favourite pastimes come to full fruition during the hard times to give us a much needed helping hand back on our feet. Until we need them, we often take our skills and qualities for granted. And I know I'm a bit stressed by how I'm gonna cope after the end of term, because summer's just a big void of possibility. Choices are strange things, they can make or break us.
So I'm going to encourage everyone now to stand up tall and proud and let us know: what's your favourite thing in the world? What activity or topic or culture really makes you squeal with joy and think, "This is my time to shine!"? What makes you feel simply glad to be alive?
Original post by .snowflake.
-squidge- I swear exams make everything worse. Getting a massive 8 page letter/ booklet thing about results day, adjustment, what to do if you cant get on Track/ if you **** up all your exams and end up in clearing this morning hasnt helped. just made me feel like I'm not going to end up at my firm. Feel prepared for AS german resit. Do NOT feel prepared for chemistry. Nor does miss saying 'I can't imagine what it would be like to not like food, isn't it sad that some people hate food so much that they don't eat?' in bio this morning. Our prerelease material for my bio exam is on AN and the influence of the media along with an awful lot of other stuff.


I remember last year on results day being the worst day of my life. Not being able to get on track because it crashed instantly. Ringing up my firm because they hadn't made a decision yet because of my ED. Stressing out at the disability office when they said they were unable to take me because of my ED. I was convinced i would be ok. Thank god they didnt take me as i dont think i would be in recovery now and I definitelty would not have enetered in-patient treatment. Looking back now, (as with ED's) i put far too much pressure on myself and the expectation of going to uni there and then. I realised nothing is THAT bad and your health comes first. I deferred the year and now it's my main motivation, to get back on track and start uni this year in a MUCH better position especially health wise.

Just to say dont expect the unrealistic of yourself. Things will be okay, and there is the whole time in the world to educate yourself, be who you want to be, follow your dreams. But your ED (although we like to think it can) won't wait, your health can't wait. And at this very stressful time, remember this. Look after yourself and your well-being before anything else.

xxxx
Original post by Anonymous
I'm guessing you do edexcel biology? I'm really freaking out about the article thing, I can't bring myself to read it again, and I'm pretty much not going to biology classes anymore after the horrific class discussions we've had (like people blurting out about how underweight they were, my biology class is weirdly thin and it always makes me feel like crap, and the person next to me talking about how it was so sad that girls felt the need to make themselves sick :s-smilie:). I can't believe edexcel thought it was appropriate to start an article with the word 'thinspiration'. I guess I'm over-sensitive to the whole thing but still, the last thing I need in an exam is thoughts about AN/BN/thinspo.


Yup. Hate the SNAB spec, seriously when you go through the orange textbook to make notes, theres been times where I've summarised two double pages in half a side of A4! I'm genuinely only doing A2 biology because I pretty much HAD to drop maths. Doesn't help that our teachers treat us like children, so making posters, cut and stick activities etc. We're 18 ffs!

Uni wise: I regret letting dad force me into going for a single sex flat. Can guarentee that I'll be the fat one/ will get put with someone who finds it funny to take other peoples food. Dad took my two brioche that I'd wanted to have for breakfast last Sat. Gets up, goes down for breakfast, brioche have gone. How do I respond to this? A black coffee, half a sugar and spending two hours in town.
(edited 11 years ago)
Surprise weigh in at the doctors, lovely. :colonhash:
I'm SO chuffed with myself, gone 5 days eating 3 meals and 2 snacks a day and HAVEN'T purged.

eeeeeeven with exams, going to try so hard to keep this up!
Reply 3438
Oh my god Squiff, don't take this the wrong way but of the "regulars" to the forum, it was you I was sensing negativity from the past month, but this last wee stint? Good on ya!

Mega proud, doesnt it feel good to be a normal human being, not an introverted, shell lurking away? Yazoooo! X
Original post by TotoMimo
Oh my god Squiff, don't take this the wrong way but of the "regulars" to the forum, it was you I was sensing negativity from the past month, but this last wee stint? Good on ya!

Mega proud, doesnt it feel good to be a normal human being, not an introverted, shell lurking away? Yazoooo! X


Yeah, I have to say it feels bloody amazing!

Feel like i'm taking the yeah i have problems but yeah i'm going to deal with them kind of approach. Even though exams have now begun, and i'm a tad underprepared :rolleyes: I'd say I feel so much better than I have in a long time. :biggrin:

Getting help with stuff is helping, just feeling like you have support and someone to turn does lift the load a little.

Quick Reply

Latest