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Eating Disorders and life with one - Discussions, Opinions, Advice. watch

    • #48
    #48

    ****ting myself about going home tomorrow and weighing myself. Before I left I was at my lowest weight (NOT an unhealthy weight) and I've tried to spend this week eating when I want as a 'stuff you' gesture to the thoughts in my head but now it's the time where I'll see the damage I've done and probably see a gain of about 6lbs on the scale. It's been so cold in my uni house that I've been eating near constantly just to take my mind off the freezing conditions...

    Couldn't fit into my nice jeans this morning, eurgh. I hope this will go better than I think.

    :hugs: Hope you're all ok.
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    (Original post by TotoMimo)
    It's weird because... Listen to this.


    After hard recovery I am..

    8st1.
    5'7.
    bmi18.4.
    Bf%12.5.

    I have a healthy body fat but not frame, yet my uncle said I was " looking like ye've been enjoying yer cakes".

    your body is desperate to regenerate, and pussyfooting around with "trying to recover" will result in "desperate regeneration" which isn't great.


    Heal yourself PROPERLY.

    PAPA TOTO HAS SPOKEN.
    What's desperate regeneration?
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    Melissa, it's the process whereby your body enters a kinda "recovery purgatory". You tease it by recovering a little, physically, and then stopping. Your body assumes you are unable to consciously continue and tries to compensate by storing glucose whenever it is consumed as a "backup". If you start recovery again your body acknowledges your efforts but continues to store excess glucose, which results in more body fat retention than it normally would.

    It's effectively partially the reason why recovered anorexics occasionally look "a bit swollen"; but just a magnified version. The "desperation recovery storage" will also cause you to have mood swings and some damned strange bowel movements as it goes through phases of storing extra of certain macronutrients, sugars and lipids (talking from experience).

    Because I was so back and forth about my recovery period my body fat and blood sugars are way higher than they've ever been, and it's because I kept lapsing and tricking myself.

    My body had a backup plan!
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    (Original post by TotoMimo)
    Melissa, it's the process whereby your body enters a kinda "recovery purgatory". You tease it by recovering a little, physically, and then stopping. Your body assumes you are unable to consciously continue and tries to compensate by storing glucose whenever it is consumed as a "backup". If you start recovery again your body acknowledges your efforts but continues to store excess glucose, which results in more body fat retention than it normally would.

    It's effectively partially the reason why recovered anorexics occasionally look "a bit swollen"; but just a magnified version. The "desperation recovery storage" will also cause you to have mood swings and some damned strange bowel movements as it goes through phases of storing extra of certain macronutrients, sugars and lipids (talking from experience).

    Because I was so back and forth about my recovery period my body fat and blood sugars are way higher than they've ever been, and it's because I kept lapsing and tricking myself.

    My body had a backup plan!
    Damn, that's not great. I'm sure it will balance back out for you though. I've been recovering but at a slow rate with my weight, but I haven't gone backwards and started losing again..so will I avoid this?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)

    My tutor CANNOT know about this, he already knows about my panic attacks and all that jazz, and i can't give the university another reason they can use to get rid of me. I shouldn't even be here in the first place, i missed my offer at A level and for some reason they went 'we'll take her anyway'
    Your thinking about this is all wrong! In my time at uni I've probably been the most problematic person in my year and my uni still refuses to put a black mark against my name. Just because you've got problems doesn't mean it's a reason for them to 'kick you out'. They can't do that unless you completely fail your exams (even then, you can resit). I initially missed my offer here (got it remarked and got what I needed to get in) but they still took me on unconditionally. Chin up. No one is going to use your illnesses against you! x
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    (Original post by MelissaJayne)
    Damn, that's not great. I'm sure it will balance back out for you though. I've been recovering but at a slow rate with my weight, but I haven't gone backwards and started losing again..so will I avoid this?
    If you're making slow and steady progress without lapses, you'll be fine. Initially my physical recovery was very fast and then slowed down when I was discharged but I didn't have any complications like Toto. x
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    (Original post by jazzykinks)
    If you're making slow and steady progress without lapses, you'll be fine. Initially my physical recovery was very fast and then slowed down when I was discharged but I didn't have any complications like Toto. x
    Thanks kins. I guess even though the foundations of our bodies are very much the same, we are all different in our own way. x
    • #81
    #81

    Seeing a shrink tomorrow for the first time. Quite nervous though as the last time I relapsed was Saturday (been doing pretty well recently) and they might not find me convincing?

    For the people who have been through this before, how do you prepare for it?
    • #48
    #48

    (Original post by jazzykinks)
    Your thinking about this is all wrong! In my time at uni I've probably been the most problematic person in my year and my uni still refuses to put a black mark against my name. Just because you've got problems doesn't mean it's a reason for them to 'kick you out'. They can't do that unless you completely fail your exams (even then, you can resit). I initially missed my offer here (got it remarked and got what I needed to get in) but they still took me on unconditionally. Chin up. No one is going to use your illnesses against you! x
    Doubly - no, triply concurred.

    Unis don't want to kick you out. You pay (I'm guessing) 9k in fees every YEAR to be there. They want that money. They want to give you a degree. In the course of my degree I've failed two modules, put mitigating circumstances in three times, postponed two exams because of anxiety, extended the deadline on many an assignment, go to see my tutor often, use the counselling service every bloody month (or so it feels :rolleyes:), been absent for lectures and seminars and I'm still here. I graduate in July.

    Your tutor NEEDS to know. Your tutor is paid to help you. He cannot do that if he doesn't know.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Doubly - no, triply concurred.

    Unis don't want to kick you out. You pay (I'm guessing) 9k in fees every YEAR to be there. They want that money. They want to give you a degree. In the course of my degree I've failed two modules, put mitigating circumstances in three times, postponed two exams because of anxiety, extended the deadline on many an assignment, go to see my tutor often, use the counselling service every bloody month (or so it feels :rolleyes:), been absent for lectures and seminars and I'm still here. I graduate in July.

    Your tutor NEEDS to know. Your tutor is paid to help you. He cannot do that if he doesn't know.
    Well, this makes me feel better about uni in September!


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    (Original post by diamonddust)
    Well, this makes me feel better about uni in September!


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    how good does it feel to get all unconditional offers dude? i need a hug. shouldn't have had such a big coffee at costa. The caffeine has got me all wired up and is making me feel really quite ill and i really need a hug.
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    Went to see a psychiatric nurse today to discuss my issue. It's so frustrating that she wouldn't take anything I said on board. Also, she kept insisting the reason why I'm binging and purging is all rounded to emotional problems. When I suggested maybe it's to do with just how the way neuropathways are firing, she took offence, as if I attacked her intelligence.

    Then I asked about a drug (topamax) which is prescribed "off label" in the US to treat B.E.D and she was like "oh no no we can't do that, we can only prescribe drugs for what they actually are meant for" or something.

    Apparently, the next step involves collating all the patients "scenarios" they get in a week, discuss them with a psychiatrist and psychologist and decide who gets what, which I think is bull****. Why did I not get a chance to speak to all 3 differently.

    Argh!!!
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    (Original post by cowsforsale)
    Went to see a psychiatric nurse today to discuss my issue. It's so frustrating that she wouldn't take anything I said on board. Also, she kept insisting the reason why I'm binging and purging is all rounded to emotional problems. When I suggested maybe it's to do with just how the way neuropathways are firing, she took offence, as if I attacked her intelligence.

    Then I asked about a drug (topamax) which is prescribed "off label" in the US to treat B.E.D and she was like "oh no no we can't do that, we can only prescribe drugs for what they actually are meant for" or something.

    Apparently, the next step involves collating all the patients "scenarios" they get in a week, discuss them with a psychiatrist and psychologist and decide who gets what, which I think is bull****. Why did I not get a chance to speak to all 3 differently.

    Argh!!!
    she's taking bull about that. Dad suffers with migranes. One of the tablets is on is actually an anti-depressant.
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    My friends have said if I don't get help then they won't be my friend anymore. It's so **** :'( literally can't cope. The thing is when I feel this bad it makes all my behaviours worse .. I either eat too much for me and purge with laxatives or throwing up or I eat nothing at all and I don't want to faint at work like I did last week. I feel so alone and I miss talking to them


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    (Original post by .snowflake.)
    she's taking bull about that. Dad suffers with migranes. One of the tablets is on is actually an anti-depressant.
    Yup.

    I mentioned dopamine/serotonin once I think when trying to make my point, and she was like "blah blah you've studied chemistry (nothing to do with this) so you obviously know how drugs interact blah blah".

    I find it horrendously ironic that I have to go to a clueless nurse about what drugs my doctor may/may not prescribe to me.
    • #132
    #132

    (Original post by cowsforsale)
    Yup.

    I mentioned dopamine/serotonin once I think when trying to make my point, and she was like "blah blah you've studied chemistry (nothing to do with this) so you obviously know how drugs interact blah blah".

    I find it horrendously ironic that I have to go to a clueless nurse about what drugs my doctor may/may not prescribe to me.
    actually, to know about serotonin etc. you've generally studied biology, but, you know.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    actually, to know about serotonin etc. you've generally studied biology, but, you know.
    Or searched through google, both for understanding my ED and in preparation for this waste of time, just saying..
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    (Original post by cowsforsale)
    Or searched through google, both for understanding my ED and in preparation for this waste of time, just saying..
    or that. -glomps- hopefully they'll get something sorted.
    • #48
    #48

    (Original post by .snowflake.)
    she's taking bull about that. Dad suffers with migranes. One of the tablets is on is actually an anti-depressant.
    Not to mention the beta blockers that are meant for migraines but are prescribed for anxiety, or the anti-depressants that are meant for depression but are prescribed for AN (rarely I believe), or aspirin which is meant for reducing blood clots but is useful for headaches and pains... :rolleyes: She sounds like an idiot.

    --

    So angry at myself = eat ALL the food. Yay. Makes sense. Lets just add another thing to be upset about... Logical brain. :rolleyes:
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    hey toto,

    i had the same eating disorder as you at the age of 14. after a ruthless treatment regime i was cured by the age of 18. i am now in the university of cambridge reading medicine to become a doctor. i have just started a youtube q&a blog where i attempt to answer questions people may have about eating disorders here : www.youtube.com/smetin92.

    i have attempted to answer 20 questions thus far and hope that my answers may help you with the perspective i have as an ex-patient with the knowledge of a soon-to-be doctor. i have enough questions for a few more vids but please do not hesitate to send me any questions you may have via youtube/twitter. If you find the videos helpful, follow me on twitter @smetin92 for updates as to when new videos are going to be released as well as general happenings in the life of a medical student

    Best Wishes,

    Simon Metin
 
 
 
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