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Eating Disorders and life with one - Discussions, Opinions, Advice. watch

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    (Original post by 05autyt)
    I'm just so scared :'( and ashamed..
    And starving yourself so that your body potentially starts shutting down isn't scary?
    Come on. Take a deep breath. Plan what you're going to say. You can do this.
    Please just confide in one person this week. No one's going to force anything on you or lock you up in a hospital but you can have someone there for support as you start your recovery.
    It's a big thing and it is scary I know, but it's not as scary as what eating disorders can do to us. Write it down if you can't say it, but just let someone know.
    Keep us informed how you get on! x
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    (Original post by Mackay)
    I agree with everything Disenchanted has said, guys. Such a good post.
    Thank you, Mackay. You guys have always helped me along (once again I'm having to pick myself up and carry on after a bad patch but I'm quicker to get back on track the more I keep going) and I'll always be there if anyone needs to message me!
    Seriously, you're an incredibly strong bunch of people.
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    (Original post by 05autyt)
    I'm just so scared :'( and ashamed..
    Hey,

    I agree with Disenchanted too. Please, please do talk to someone about this and get some medical help - without wanting to sound patronising, it is so, so dangerous with laxatives like that, it's not worth doing this to yourself over.

    The best thing you can do is ask for help. Nobody's going to judge you for it, and it sounds like you really do need it. I can relate very much to struggling with liquids at the moment too, but it's so dangerous. Anything at all you can try and drink would be great. If it's too difficult to try having a whole drink, could you try little sips every 15 mins or so? Maybe with a straw, sometimes that can be easier.

    Please do talk to someone though, it sounds like you really need to.
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    (Original post by x-Disenchanted-x)
    And starving yourself so that your body potentially starts shutting down isn't scary?
    Come on. Take a deep breath. Plan what you're going to say. You can do this.
    Please just confide in one person this week. No one's going to force anything on you or lock you up in a hospital but you can have someone there for support as you start your recovery.
    It's a big thing and it is scary I know, but it's not as scary as what eating disorders can do to us. Write it down if you can't say it, but just let someone know.
    Keep us informed how you get on! x
    (Original post by Liv1204)
    Hey,

    I agree with Disenchanted too. Please, please do talk to someone about this and get some medical help - without wanting to sound patronising, it is so, so dangerous with laxatives like that, it's not worth doing this to yourself over.

    The best thing you can do is ask for help. Nobody's going to judge you for it, and it sounds like you really do need it. I can relate very much to struggling with liquids at the moment too, but it's so dangerous. Anything at all you can try and drink would be great. If it's too difficult to try having a whole drink, could you try little sips every 15 mins or so? Maybe with a straw, sometimes that can be easier.

    Please do talk to someone though, it sounds like you really need to.
    Thanks guys. I guess I need it even if I am terrified. I'll try and talk to a friend then see about doctors. I just feel so huge and panicky all the time I hate this. I feel so close to just giving up
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    Hi All,

    Recently found out that one of my friends at Uni is struggling with an eating disorder
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    Throwing up after she eats, and often not eating much at all. Apparently happening for a few months now


    Basically posting to ask whether anyone has any advice to help support her at all
    She went to the GP a couple of weeks ago, though hasn't been since, and I think I might have heard today that she cancelled the other appointments They were going to monitor her weight, I think?

    She exercises quite a lot at the gym, and does lots of swimming - which obviously (I think?) isn't the best idea if she's not eating properly Also sometimes drinks a lot, which again isn't too good.

    Any help/advice most welcome. I'm self-diagnosed very-mild depression, so would say I have quite a good awareness of MH and the like, but not sure what to say/not say. Think I might try and advise her to try counselling? And also to reconsider the GP? But don't really know. Also noone in my uni-friends know about my depression/low mood, so not sure whether to mention or not If that would help her?


    Many thanks!
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    all i want to do is eat. Just eat everything in the flat



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    (Original post by keromedic)
    I'm slowly trying to get used to cooking like everyday so I dont binge on pastries

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    Haha this is me mate, or a deadline comes and I'm straight on the cake :P
    So far I've learned how to do everything on toast, an omelette and stir fry


    I get really frustrated by my emotional eating, but it's a hell of a lot better than where I was even this time last year, and completely different to the personal hell I made myself during A Levels.
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    [(Although I still wonder how far my now doing protein shakes is fuelled by ED/body image anxiety...)
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    Hey, just an update.
    I told two close friends on Thursday, and I booked a doctors appointment for Wednesday this morning.
    I'm terrified.. but I need to do it. I purge every food and liquid I consume at the min and I had another whole pack of laxatives at the weekend. I need help. I needed to do this. doesn't make me any less scared though :/
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    (Original post by 05autyt)
    Hey, just an update.
    I told two close friends on Thursday, and I booked a doctors appointment for Wednesday this morning.
    I'm terrified.. but I need to do it. I purge every food and liquid I consume at the min and I had another whole pack of laxatives at the weekend. I need help. I needed to do this. doesn't make me any less scared though :/
    Well done for talking to your friends and booking an appointment hun! :hugs:


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    (Original post by 05autyt)
    Hey, just an update.
    I told two close friends on Thursday, and I booked a doctors appointment for Wednesday this morning.
    I'm terrified.. but I need to do it. I purge every food and liquid I consume at the min and I had another whole pack of laxatives at the weekend. I need help. I needed to do this. doesn't make me any less scared though :/
    Well done for booking the doctor's appointment. I know how terrifying it is, but you're right - you do need to do it, and it is the first step towards getting some help and getting your life back, because there is so, so much more to life than that and you're worth more than purging and laxatives.

    I hope the appointment helps. x
    • #43
    #43

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    OK tell a lie. Not very happy with this. It's not super serious but I wish I could stop comfort eating when lonely, but it's hard not to because then everyone thinks you're on a diet and (in my case) family will start worrying about my ED etc.
    I wish people would udnerstand that I really do enjoy sweet treats and stuff-in fact I'd quite happily go on a binge and I'd find it difficult to stop that.
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    ^^ Anon is me.
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    This time last year I made the decision to stop my disordered eating and to battle this terrible illness. I remember it all clearly i was sat on my bed with my food diary planning my meals trying my best to stay under 100 calories.

    I wouldn't say I've completely healed it creeps back every couple of months but I have more energy now and i don't cry as much now. I'll never be perfect or have complete control of my life, I have flaws and I hate my mood swings but at the same time I do fully embrace them as a permanent part about me.

    I have now set up an organisation the aim is to spread awareness of ED's as well as mental health and body dismorphia. It's still early days but I hope it can grow. I didn't have anyone talk to I was helpless and paralyazed with fear and shame. And as someone who has battled an ED and other illnesses I can understand why someone would feel that way. If there is someone who is struggling feel free to pm me.

    Remember food is fuel. (:


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    (Original post by PonchoKid)
    Well done for talking to your friends and booking an appointment hun! :hugs:


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    (Original post by Liv1204)
    Well done for booking the doctor's appointment. I know how terrifying it is, but you're right - you do need to do it, and it is the first step towards getting some help and getting your life back, because there is so, so much more to life than that and you're worth more than purging and laxatives.

    I hope the appointment helps. x
    Thank you! Hope you are both doing ok x
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    not sure how much to spoiler, so i'll just play it safe and spoiler it all

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    okay so basically for the last year or so, i've been slowly developing an eating disorder - it started off with restricting, then fasting then purging, then i moved to uni and started bingeing and purging, i've gained and lost the same couple of kgs over and over again. alongside that i have longstanding issues with generalised anxiety and depression, and at christmas i decided that enough was enough and i decided to go and speak to a doctor about things. since then i've been put on 20mg citalopram, some multivitamins because various bits and bobs were deficient, and have been referred to clinical psychology. but whilst this was by far one of the best decisions i've ever made, i can't help but feel some aspects of my ED and depression have worsened somewhat since going to speak to my doctor. i'd abused laxatives before but now i am pretty much dependent on them (i take at least 10 every single day, and i plan out my days according to when i think they'll kick in and i panic when i can't take them), i've started purging eventhough i was previously a good month or so clean, and the obsessive food thoughts have completely taken over my head again. but every time i mention the laxatives to my GP, she doesn't too concerned about it - it's like because i'm at a healthy weight, it doesn't matter that i spend more on laxatives each week than food and my referral will take about half a year to come through, i've been told, and it's not to a specialist so it might be years before i see a specialist. i'm not sure how long i can keep up this semi-recovery, because every day its getting harder and harder. the summer break is quickly coming up and my head is just screaming at me to use the three months to lose as much weight as possible before coming back to uni so that all my friends at uni will be like "ooo have you lost weight"
    god i just don't know what to do
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    Hey guys, hope everyone's alright

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    So I am at a good healthy weight now
    I want to maintain this, and (dare I say)...not los a few pounds actually, bulk up. |But hey ho.
    How do I feel alright about turning down offers of junk food (mostly because the sugar crash leaves me feeling low...) when I think that I have to be gaining? I am in the mindset where I'm on a meal plan and have to eat or will be noticed as having relapse.
    Is it even possible to maintain-or even lose-weight healthily once recovered, without it triggering a relapse?
    I'm honestly more concerned by my need to comfort-eat/get depressed over what others think of my lifestyle choices to keep in a good mood, than whether I'm eating enough now.
    • #122
    #122

    Pretty general life rant..

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    It's virtually been three months since I started recovering. It'd all been going to well but in the past week or so i've hit a real low. I feel so out of control, i'm tired, I feel helpless. I intend to talk to somebody then totally bottle it. I don't want to steep further in to my purging cycle but food is always on my mind. I'm supposed to be meal planning due to a medical condition but all this does is acknowledge that i'm not eating properly so I avoid it .. I then don't know what to eat so don't eat at all. Solutions seem so easy. I've been spending a lot of time with a guy which is so good in one instance then I become overpowered with feelings that i'm not good enough, rejection etc. I'm torn between reckless behaviour like drinking and going out and becoming very introverted; spending all of my time in the library and away from people. No matter which one I chose I always seem to regret the decision. I wish I wasn't like this
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    (Original post by Team_McDreamy)
    not sure how much to spoiler, so i'll just play it safe and spoiler it all ]
    Heya, well done for seeing your GP first, that's not easy to do. I think you need to either ask your GP specifically to help you reduce the laxatives, or to make an appointment with another GP because abusing laxatives can do a lot of harm to you and it does need dealing with, weight is irrelevant to that.

    Can you identify anything in particular that's contributed to making your ED worse recently?

    Wish I could say more to help re. the referral, but I'm sorry it's going to take that long, it really does suck sometimes with the amount of time it can take to receive help when you're asking for help and can feel yourself getting worse.

    Try to ignore those thoughts about going back to uni having lost weight though - is that really worth more than the opportunity of going back to uni being healthy and happy and ready to enjoy it?

    (Original post by Riku)
    Hey guys, hope everyone's alright

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    So I am at a good healthy weight now
    I want to maintain this, and (dare I say)...not los a few pounds actually, bulk up. |But hey ho.
    How do I feel alright about turning down offers of junk food (mostly because the sugar crash leaves me feeling low...) when I think that I have to be gaining? I am in the mindset where I'm on a meal plan and have to eat or will be noticed as having relapse.
    Is it even possible to maintain-or even lose-weight healthily once recovered, without it triggering a relapse?
    I'm honestly more concerned by my need to comfort-eat/get depressed over what others think of my lifestyle choices to keep in a good mood, than whether I'm eating enough now.
    Hey Riku

    Congrats on being a good healthy weight! And for the positive attitude for wanting to maintain that etc.

    With the junk food...I think it just really comes down to, if you don't want it it's ok to say no, so long as it is for healthy reasons - the sugar crash, because you're not in the mood, because you're not hungry, etc etc. But don't over-analyse the sugar crash too much, at the same time - some sugar is ok and some junk food is ok if you do fancy it!

    It's definitely possible to maintain weight without triggering a relapse, the key thing is to find that balance between eating a healthy meal plan but also just having things sometimes just because it looks nice or you fancied something different, if that makes sense.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Pretty general life rant..

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    It's virtually been three months since I started recovering. It'd all been going to well but in the past week or so i've hit a real low. I feel so out of control, i'm tired, I feel helpless. I intend to talk to somebody then totally bottle it. I don't want to steep further in to my purging cycle but food is always on my mind. I'm supposed to be meal planning due to a medical condition but all this does is acknowledge that i'm not eating properly so I avoid it .. I then don't know what to eat so don't eat at all. Solutions seem so easy. I've been spending a lot of time with a guy which is so good in one instance then I become overpowered with feelings that i'm not good enough, rejection etc. I'm torn between reckless behaviour like drinking and going out and becoming very introverted; spending all of my time in the library and away from people. No matter which one I chose I always seem to regret the decision. I wish I wasn't like this
    Well done for the progress in your recovery so far.

    Has anything in particular happened in the last week or so to cange your mood? Remember that it is normal to take a step backwards sometimes - the important thing is that you're recognising that and that you try to take steps to deal with it. If you could talk to someone about what's going on it would be great.

    It sounds like getting the meal plan sorted with your medical condition would be a great start, is there someone helping you to do that?
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    I was diagnosed with anorexia on Thursday.

    I went to the psychiatrist appointment expecting them to say I'm fine, that it's not too bad, that I'm eating well. She asked how I feel about being treated in the community though, and how I'd feel about going into hospital. I'm being referred to a specialist service to help them work with me, so it's going to be outpatient treatment, probably either weekly or fortnightly therapy, with a meal plan which is eventually going to end up being 3 meals and 3 snacks a day. Which is absolutely terrifying. The focus seems to be on avoiding admission at the moment, which is good but I'm terrified that that's even been considered.

    I saw my GP today, who said if I lose more weight I probably will end up being admitted to hospital. She's asked me to think about what to do with my studies at the moment because she says it's a lot of pressure on me. The Mental Health adviser at my uni has spoken to my GP, and has also told me his concerns, the MSc programme leader has mentioned going part-time, I'm not allowed to go kickboxing at the moment, I just feel like I'm losing everything. I tried really hard to eat properly tonight though - more than I have in a long time. I just want to feel better again.
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    Hey lovelies. I just found this and wanted to share it:

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    :bubbles:
 
 
 
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