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    (Original post by lluke_1992)
    I have a friend who is SERVERELY suffering with bulemia. Ive known about it for around a year and its got continuously worse. She says shes not doing it because she wants to but because she 'has' to. She is absoultely desperate to beat it. Shes eating very little and whenever she does it shes throughs it back up.

    Can anyone give me any advice to help her as im worried about her :\
    The fact that she feels as if she 'has to' is worrying. Very worrying. That’s the compulsive, consuming nature of an ED; it wants to take control and fighting that is difficult. Thank goodness she has a friend like you to look out for her!

    First off: have you talked to her about it and does anyone else know? Her being determined to 'beat' this is a good sign; she's obviously not in complete denial and wants to change (and can!) Little day to day things you can do are just things like complimenting her gently, reminding her of her good-points. The transgression from eating little => feeling down => feeling depressed happens scarily fast, and she'll probably need all the support she can get.

    Stay by her and don't give up on trying to help; people with EDs can act irrationally when really they are scared and worried because this awful thing has come along and taken over.

    If it's getting more serious than that it's time to consult her about having a problem and perhaps notifying a doctor. Recovery is scary as hell for most but there are people on this thread who can vouch for its improvement on their lives.

    I hope everything sorts out - and do NOT hesitate to ask the rest of this thread for advice (or perhaps even direct her here, if she has TSR? Getting your thoughts out helps a tonne.) They're a trillion times more knowledgeable than me and are ALL really lovely people. (:hugs: To you all, by the way.)
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    (Original post by Lily Academia)
    The fact that she feels as if she 'has to' is worrying. Very worrying. That’s the compulsive, consuming nature of an ED; it wants to take control and fighting that is difficult. Thank goodness she has a friend like you to look out for her!

    First off: have you talked to her about it and does anyone else know? Her being determined to 'beat' this is a good sign; she's obviously not in complete denial and wants to change (and can!) Little day to day things you can do are just things like complimenting her gently, reminding her of her good-points. The transgression from eating little => feeling down => feeling depressed happens scarily fast, and she'll probably need all the support she can get.

    Stay by her and don't give up on trying to help; people with EDs can act irrationally when really they are scared and worried because this awful thing has come along and taken over.

    If it's getting more serious than that it's time to consult her about having a problem and perhaps notifying a doctor. Recovery is scary as hell for most but there are people on this thread who can vouch for its improvement on their lives.

    I hope everything sorts out - and do NOT hesitate to ask the rest of this thread for advice (or perhaps even direct her here, if she has TSR? Getting your thoughts out helps a tonne.) They're a trillion times more knowledgeable than me and are ALL really lovely people. (:hugs: To you all, by the way.)
    Thanks for the reply

    Its got progressively worse like I said. I was the first person she told and it took me a while to get it of her. Just recently (after much persuasion) ive got her to tell her mum about it. Her mum has reacted and said that she would help her, but I know im no expert but I would of thought her mum would of got professionals involved. Her mums just said that they'll work it through together.

    I also managed to persuade her to go and see her doctor at uni and she did (this was like 6 months ago now). The doctor referred her to a specialist but she was put on a waiting list which they said could take up to a year!!

    Hmmmm im just really worried about her :\. She used to be a really happy person and its literally taken over her life. I live just round the corner from her so ive told her that whenever she feels down or anything to text me and il come round belongs im in and I do go round butt i just dont know what to suggest to her. :\
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    (Original post by lluke_1992)
    Thanks for the reply

    Its got progressively worse like I said. I was the first person she told and it took me a while to get it of her. Just recently (after much persuasion) ive got her to tell her mum about it. Her mum has reacted and said that she would help her, but I know im no expert but I would of thought her mum would of got professionals involved. Her mums just said that they'll work it through together.

    I also managed to persuade her to go and see her doctor at uni and she did (this was like 6 months ago now). The doctor referred her to a specialist but she was put on a waiting list which they said could take up to a year!!

    Hmmmm im just really worried about her :\. She used to be a really happy person and its literally taken over her life. I live just round the corner from her so ive told her that whenever she feels down or anything to text me and il come round belongs im in and I do go round butt i just dont know what to suggest to her. :\
    She is lucky to have you, because you've been brilliant so far in what you've done. Just stay by her and give her support - you've done all the right things in getting people aware of the issue, so don't harm yourself in worrying. Chances are if she was a really happy person she will RETURN to that same person... it'll just take time, because she has to fight against something that's not entirely obvious or easy to fix. Recovery is so difficult because you have to want it. She has to fight with herself, and she is the only one who can do it.
    • #50
    #50

    Today I haven't been sick at all But I feel like if I eat any more I will...

    I had: 2 bowls of muesli, a plain bagel and an apple, that's more than enough right?
    Oh and a cup of tea with sugar and milk!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Today I haven't been sick at all But I feel like if I eat any more I will...

    I had: 2 bowls of muesli, a plain bagel and an apple, that's more than enough right?
    Oh and a cup of tea with sugar and milk!
    No. It is not enough. Even an optimistic estimate still puts intake at @700 kcals - far too little. Just to maintain weight women need 2000kcal and men 2500 - depending on activity levels of course.

    But well done for not throwing up!

    For recovery you know that you will have to get used to eating enough to keep your weight stable throwing up - but you will get there!
    • #50
    #50

    (Original post by Arcane Barn Elk)
    No. It is not enough. Even an optimistic estimate still puts intake at @700 kcals - far too little. Just to maintain weight women need 2000kcal and men 2500 - depending on activity levels of course.

    But well done for not throwing up!

    For recovery you know that you will have to get used to eating enough to keep your weight stable throwing up - but you will get there!
    I don't count calories so I get confused easily over portion sizes... I always say I don't have a problem with my body, but having an empty stomach feels so good I know it shouldn't, though.
    Luckily I have a normal bodyweight so nobody suspects anything, my mum tells me every time she calls me that I'm overweight :sigh: (I'm not)
    • #53
    #53

    I spend every single day fighting my eating disorder and my heart goes out to you.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I don't count calories so I get confused easily over portion sizes... .........Luckily I have a normal bodyweight so nobody suspects anything, my mum tells me every time she calls me that I'm overweight :sigh: (I'm not)
    I'm so sorry that your Mum says that! Some parents just aren't supportive and have no idea about the effect that they have.

    Have you told her that you don't like it and asked her to stop? Then whenever she does it you can say that you've asked her and end the conversation.

    The trouble with not counting calories is that, as you've found, it is so easy to kid yourself that you've had enough to eat.

    You need three meals a day each containing some protein, carbohydrate, fat, fruit or vegetables. A bowl of muesli is a light breakfast or a snack, just as one bagel is.
    Look at an ordinary sized dinner plate, as a general guideline a meal would look like this: 1/4 should be carbohydrate, 1/2 should be vegetables and 1/4 should be protein.

    You're in the right thread for support. The guys on this thread are great
    • #50
    #50

    (Original post by Arcane Barn Elk)
    I'm so sorry that your Mum says that! Some parents just aren't supportive and have no idea about the effect that they have.

    Have you told her that you don't like it and asked her to stop? Then whenever she does it you can say that you've asked her and end the conversation.

    The trouble with not counting calories is that, as you've found, it is so easy to kid yourself that you've had enough to eat.

    You need three meals a day each containing some protein, carbohydrate, fat, fruit or vegetables. A bowl of muesli is a light breakfast or a snack, just as one bagel is.
    Look at an ordinary sized dinner plate, as a general guideline a meal would look like this: 1/4 should be carbohydrate, 1/2 should be vegetables and 1/4 should be protein.

    You're in the right thread for support. The guys on this thread are great
    Thanks for your post My mum is quite quite overweight herself and she's scared of me overeating to the point where I have to find size 16-18 clothes (I'm a healthy 10-12 now, I'm taller than average) and start looking like her.

    I used to be able to eat normal portions and not worry about food and only purge every month or so, but in the past couple of months it has become an obsession I don't know whether it's stress induced (actually I'm pretty sure it plays a role) but I feel like if I eat too much it will just end up being brought back up... I need to restrict myself in order to not be sick, basically. Argh, vicious cycle!
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    Hi! New to this student room thing.... haha
    I am diagnosed with anorexia and have a bmi of 16, i am seeing a doctor weekly and a therapist. however both keep threatening to admit me to hospital
    I have just got a place at Birmingham University in September....less than a month now!!
    Any advice on starting uni with a severe eating disorder?
    Reading though these posts has been amazing, you all have done so well!!!
    xxxx
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    Natalie, I am going to sound like a tactless monster here, but it is merely the truth. The NHS are not a scapegoat for your ED.

    We must all be responsible for our own individual EDs and scenarios and know that it is the uncompromising and completely unreasonable rules set aside by our own minds that have caused our ailments.

    You have all the time in the world for university, but the time is right NOW for recovery. Do you want to be in my position? 26 years old, finished uni, has a great job but can't do it because the ED takes presidency?
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    Just wanted to drop in this thread and wish everyone on it all the hope in the world they can recover from their ED.

    I personally have recovered from my ED, but I understand the frustration and pain you all have to endure on a day to day basis - my message to you all is keep on trying to recover, because I can't begin to describe how much happier I am without my ED and I wish you could all feel the same. I used to think I was nothing without my ED, but now I feel like normal person again which doesn't have a horrible secret to hide all the time.

    Best wishes to you all

    :heart: :heart: :heart:
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    Hello! :hi:

    I'm not sure if I'm officially classed as an 'eating disorder' as I'm not anorexic or bulimic, but I have severe emetophobia (phobia of vomiting) so I control what I eat and get very anxious about food. This causes me to be very underweight (5'3" 40kg BMI currently~15-16), but I'm working on gaining weight as much as I can.

    Just thought I'd drop in and say.. hi And good luck to everyone battling with eating disorders.
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    (Original post by TotoMimo)
    Cloppy, a thousand times over, I applaud you. You're so incredibly brave to have posted with your own screen name, and this is the first step in acceptance and telling the world, "this is me, I am vulnerable, I am suffering, but I can DO this!"

    Hiding away is when the ED eats away at your psyche and breaks down your mental and emotional defences. When THOSE are gone, it's easy for it to destroy your body. Trivial, even. By telling us your thoughts, anxieties and feelings more regularly, you can vent what would otherwise be welling up inside.

    A problem shared is a problem halved.


    On a separate tangent, I am just shy of my BMI being 16 now... that's the GOOD news. Bad news? I broke my wrist by merely LEANING on it. Anorexia-induced acute osteoperosis? Not recommended. I am like reverse Wolverine. An exoskeleton made out of breadsticks.
    Thanks Toto. I fully agree, entertain one ED thought or inclination and it will fester and multiply and become REAL in your mind, making those necessary recovery steps a zillion times harder. I find that getting it 'out there', telling someone or even just writing it down, pours cold water on the affair before it has a chance to get going. Sharing the illogical ED thoughts is difficult, but usually the difficulty comes because it forces you to recognise just how ridiculous and ultimately meaningless an ED perspective/thought/behaviour truly is. Of course it's not always easy or straightforward to recognise and label a thought as a disordered one, especially if it's been ingrained over time or fostered as a normal 'part of you'.

    This is going to sound incredibly lame, but I find that it sometimes helps to imagine a healthy version of myself, who is not only ED free but really happy, with happy friends and happy family and generally not wussing out of life. When I have a not-so-strong day (and say, feel like restricting) I ask what healthy, super-coolio me would do in this situation. That version gives some sound pieces of advice!

    I'm sorry to hear about your wrist. The after-effects of an ED are not exactly party-time are they? Your body will heal though, all you have to do is heed its call and feed it! Keep at it m'dear!
    • #46
    #46

    Because I haven't lost any weight in 3 weeks I am very very anxious and feel like I am expanding every day even though i'm saying the same. This is horrible Makes me feel like i'm getting bigger and bigger and won't stop
    • #46
    #46

    Spoiler:
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    And physically feeling heavier and heavier - like I have so much fat I can't breathe
    • #50
    #50

    I ate quite a lot (unhealthy stuff, too)... My stomach feels stretched and it's so hard not to go to the toilet and bring it back up I'm trying hard to keep it all in...
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    finding everything really triggering - please can people use spoilers


    about university and advice on how to cope - don't really think it's triggering but seeing as i asked people to use spoilers i guess i should just incase...


    Spoiler:
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    can anyone give advice on the best way to cope with an ed at university - like how to not draw attention to my eating problems and weight issues in front of the people i'm sharing with as i'd rather them not know but at the same time i don't want it to be left to get out of control, i'm worried that without being forced to eat reasonably by people who know that i'll take advantage and restrict more. i don't want to get more ill i just want to get better - but old habits and the temptation is so hard to kick
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    (Original post by squiff93)
    finding everything really triggering - please can people use spoilers :'(
    :hugs: Me too actually. I wish people would please please spoiler numbers.
    How did results day go btw? Did you get into Essex? :hugs:
    • #50
    #50

    Sorry, I can't put it in spoilers now because I made it anonymously, I don't know if mods can change it? Didn't mean to have that effect
 
 
 
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