I’ve been feeling a bit low lately and I was just hoping if people could cheer me up somehow...and I appreciate anyone who bothers to read and reply to this...
I was with a guy for all of last summer and we met up again over Christmas...well anyways long story short, we saw each other all of last summer but we ended up having to go to different colleges, we're three hours away from each other, but we’re both from the same hometown. He liked me a lot though and it killed him to do this but he felt it was for the best. Anyways he ended things back in September. He thought the long distance think just couldn’t work and he said he just couldn’t do that to me because he only comes home once a month, plus he said he was going to America this summer with his best friends (who he barely sees) so we wouldn’t even have that together. I found that out at Christmas and we had a heart to heart talk. But I found out the other day that they’re not going away this summer after all (I’m not sure why). Now I feel as if, wow, they’re not going away this summer after all, and we could have actually stayed together and would have had the summer, it could have worked.
But the thing is now, I think he’s seeing a girl in his course...and out of all days I found it out on my birthday. Saw pictures all over facebook. I was accepting of it at first, I was actually proud of myself how little it bothered me, but now it just makes me sad that he’s found someone, Im just some girl in his past, if that’s where things are going. I’ve met guys since, and I’m kind of seeing someone in my course atm, but to be honest I don’t really like him that much in that way. I just can’t help but compare. In ways I think I just like the attention and the company because I just feel lonely. I was crazy about him and thought so highly of him, and it’s nearly eight months since and it still seems to affect my life. I can’t delete him as a friend on facebook nor his number because we always said we’d be friends, even though how hard I find it. I just can’t understand why it hurts me and I have feelings for him still. Ultimately, I think the thing that hurts me most is that I liked and cared for him so much more than he ever did for me. I’ve tried moving on with other guys but that hasn’t worked. In the past ten years, he was the one thing that made me truly happy, something I had never been in years as I’ve had a few personal issues. Why can’t I just get over him?
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