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Fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me =( watch

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    I don't really know why I'm making a thread about it - I guess I'm just really upset. I've been living with my fiancé and his mum and his brother and sister (when she's not at uni) for over a year now and we're getting married in march.

    I'd always though me and his brother got on quite well, but we went out last night (sort of a belated engagement celebration - because it's the first time his sisters been back since we got engaged) and his brother had been in a pretty bad mood all day and his sister asked him why and we were just chatting and having a joke and stuff and then he just started on me saying "piss off piss off piss off, I can't stand you, I actually can't stand you".

    I just don't know how he could say something like this - I have never done anything to him and my fiancé had even asked him to be a grooms man at the wedding and he seemed happy and now apparently he can't stand me?

    I know he'd been in a bad mood, but it really felt like he meant it. It's just really awkward now, he hasn't apologised, and a lot of the time it's just me and him in the house and now I don't even want to be here.

    I just don't know what to do now - it really hurts.

    tl;dr: My fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me, and I'm upset because I always thought we got on alright and he was supposed to be an usher at the wedding, now everythings awkward and I don't want to be in a room with him.
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    (Original post by The_Goose)
    I don't really know why I'm making a thread about it - I guess I'm just really upset. I've been living with my fiancé and his mum and his brother and sister (when she's not at uni) for over a year now and we're getting married in march.

    I'd always though me and his brother got on quite well, but we went out last night (sort of a belated engagement celebration - because it's the first time his sisters been back since we got engaged) and his brother had been in a pretty bad mood all day and his sister asked him why and we were just chatting and having a joke and stuff and then he just started on me saying "piss off piss off piss off, I can't stand you, I actually can't stand you".

    I just don't know how he could say something like this - I have never done anything to him and my fiancé had even asked him to be a grooms man at the wedding and he seemed happy and now apparently he can't stand me?

    I know he'd been in a bad mood, but it really felt like he meant it. It's just really awkward now, he hasn't apologised, and a lot of the time it's just me and him in the house and now I don't even want to be here.

    I just don't know what to do now - it really hurts.

    tl;dr: My fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me, and I'm upset because I always thought we got on alright and he was supposed to be an usher at the wedding, now everythings awkward and I don't want to be in a room with him.
    Have you spoken to your fiancé about this?? Perhaps it would be best to tell him, and see what he says about it? Was there any chance that he could have just been joking (even though it's clearly not very funny)

    Sorry not to be much help *hugggsss*
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    (Original post by The_Goose)
    I don't really know why I'm making a thread about it - I guess I'm just really upset. I've been living with my fiancé and his mum and his brother and sister (when she's not at uni) for over a year now and we're getting married in march.

    I'd always though me and his brother got on quite well, but we went out last night (sort of a belated engagement celebration - because it's the first time his sisters been back since we got engaged) and his brother had been in a pretty bad mood all day and his sister asked him why and we were just chatting and having a joke and stuff and then he just started on me saying "piss off piss off piss off, I can't stand you, I actually can't stand you".

    I just don't know how he could say something like this - I have never done anything to him and my fiancé had even asked him to be a grooms man at the wedding and he seemed happy and now apparently he can't stand me?

    I know he'd been in a bad mood, but it really felt like he meant it. It's just really awkward now, he hasn't apologised, and a lot of the time it's just me and him in the house and now I don't even want to be here.

    I just don't know what to do now - it really hurts.

    tl;dr: My fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me, and I'm upset because I always thought we got on alright and he was supposed to be an usher at the wedding, now everythings awkward and I don't want to be in a room with him.
    'Bad mood' are the key words in the situation People say stuff bad stuff like they mean it when they are in a bad mood.

    How old is he just out of interest?
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    he might have been more drunk than you thought, how did everyone react
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    Just get "haters gonna hate" on the back of your wedding dress.
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    (Original post by proud nd luvin it)
    Have you spoken to your fiancé about this?? Perhaps it would be best to tell him, and see what he says about it? Was there any chance that he could have just been joking (even though it's clearly not very funny)

    Sorry not to be much help *hugggsss*
    He was sitting right next to me when he said it. He wants to have words with him, but I've told him not to. I don't want him to hate me even more.

    He wasn't joking.
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    I guess you will move to your own apartment when you get married, so you won't see him daily. At the end it's your fiancé's opinion that matters, not his brother's :rolleyes:
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    How old is he?

    edit: he sounds like he's being really immature (like a 10 year old) - you're marrying his brother not him and if you haven't done anything and he hasn't given a justification for what he said then yes it's awkward but just ignore him, especially if your fiancé has taken your side on this
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    (Original post by No Man)
    'Bad mood' are the key words in the situation People say stuff bad stuff like they mean it when they are in a bad mood.

    How old is he just out of interest?
    He'll be 18 in June


    (Original post by reisen)
    he might have been more drunk than you thought, how did everyone react
    He wasn't drunk. People were just silent. There was him, and and my fiancé and then their sister and her boyfriend. Nobody said anything to him, we should sort of went back to our conversation, him not joining in and I put on a brave face for the night.
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    (Original post by The_Goose)
    I don't really know why I'm making a thread about it - I guess I'm just really upset. I've been living with my fiancé and his mum and his brother and sister (when she's not at uni) for over a year now and we're getting married in march.

    I'd always though me and his brother got on quite well, but we went out last night (sort of a belated engagement celebration - because it's the first time his sisters been back since we got engaged) and his brother had been in a pretty bad mood all day and his sister asked him why and we were just chatting and having a joke and stuff and then he just started on me saying "piss off piss off piss off, I can't stand you, I actually can't stand you".

    I just don't know how he could say something like this - I have never done anything to him and my fiancé had even asked him to be a grooms man at the wedding and he seemed happy and now apparently he can't stand me?

    I know he'd been in a bad mood, but it really felt like he meant it. It's just really awkward now, he hasn't apologised, and a lot of the time it's just me and him in the house and now I don't even want to be here.

    I just don't know what to do now - it really hurts.

    tl;dr: My fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me, and I'm upset because I always thought we got on alright and he was supposed to be an usher at the wedding, now everythings awkward and I don't want to be in a room with him.
    I chortled. thx bb.


    I mean, he's ****ing 17. As lame as it is, most 17 year olds are *****. Grow some balls *****.
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    Doesn't sound like a personal attack tbh. Just sounds like he was pissed off an you were there for him to take it out on.

    Just leave him for a while, if he doesn't apologise just get your fiancé to speak with him.
    Or even you speak with him if you feel up to it.
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    As someone who had his sister's boyfriend living with them for 6 months, trust me, his brother is sick of the sight of you. In his eyes, you're a guest in the house and while you're there it means that he can't fully relax and be himself.

    Harsh but true.
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    (Original post by The_Goose)
    I don't really know why I'm making a thread about it - I guess I'm just really upset. I've been living with my fiancé and his mum and his brother and sister (when she's not at uni) for over a year now and we're getting married in march.

    I'd always though me and his brother got on quite well, but we went out last night (sort of a belated engagement celebration - because it's the first time his sisters been back since we got engaged) and his brother had been in a pretty bad mood all day and his sister asked him why and we were just chatting and having a joke and stuff and then he just started on me saying "piss off piss off piss off, I can't stand you, I actually can't stand you".

    I just don't know how he could say something like this - I have never done anything to him and my fiancé had even asked him to be a grooms man at the wedding and he seemed happy and now apparently he can't stand me?

    I know he'd been in a bad mood, but it really felt like he meant it. It's just really awkward now, he hasn't apologised, and a lot of the time it's just me and him in the house and now I don't even want to be here.

    I just don't know what to do now - it really hurts.

    tl;dr: My fiancé's brother told me he can't stand me, and I'm upset because I always thought we got on alright and he was supposed to be an usher at the wedding, now everythings awkward and I don't want to be in a room with him.

    Tell your Fiance.... if anything - He'll just beat the **** out of his little brother...
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    (Original post by alijimi)
    I guess you will move to your own apartment when you get married, so you won't see him daily. At the end it's your fiancé's opinion that matters, not his brother's :rolleyes:
    I know that, we're moving out as soon as we can afford it, but we're saving for the wedding as well so money just isn't going very far at the minute.

    (Original post by Melting Sugar.)
    How old is he?

    edit: he sounds like he's being really immature (like a 10 year old) - you're marrying his brother not him and if you haven't done anything and he hasn't given a justification for what he said then yes it's awkward but just ignore him, especially if your fiancé has taken your side on this
    Yea he's taken my side, he thinks it's disgusting what he said. I haven't done anything to him, I don't know why he said what he said, but I could tell by his face that he meant it.
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    (Original post by The_Goose)
    He'll be 18 in June




    He wasn't drunk. People were just silent. There was him, and and my fiancé and then their sister and her boyfriend. Nobody said anything to him, we should sort of went back to our conversation, him not joining in and I put on a brave face for the night.
    If he's 17 then I really wouldn't worry about it but I do think your bf should have a word with him, he won't know you put him up to it as your bf heard himself what was said
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    (Original post by reisen)
    If he's 17 then I really wouldn't worry about it but I do think your bf should have a word with him, he won't know you put him up to it as your bf heard himself what was said
    I just don't want to aggravate the situation. He wanted to talk to him about it, may be I should have let him.
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    Seems to me hes just jealous of your fiance ^-^

    The best thing IMO is to confront him or else its going to be awkward forever so while the matter is still hot confront him. What ever is his explanation for that it shouldnt really matter because at the end of the day hes not the one you chose to spend your life with and IF he really cares about his brother then he should learn to suck it up.

    Dont let him get to you!

    Congrats btw
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    (Original post by Lemozo)
    As someone who had his sister's boyfriend living with them for 6 months, trust me, his brother is sick of the sight of you. In his eyes, you're a guest in the house and while you're there it means that he can't fully relax and be himself.

    Harsh but true.
    This is most likely it- I wouldn't take it personally
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    (Original post by The_Goose)
    I know that, we're moving out as soon as we can afford it, but we're saving for the wedding as well so money just isn't going very far at the minute.



    Yea he's taken my side, he thinks it's disgusting what he said. I haven't done anything to him, I don't know why he said what he said, but I could tell by his face that he meant it.
    Maybe it might be better to find out why he doesn't like you. If it's just that he's being immature because you're "stealing" his brother away then you can take the high road and hope that in a few years he grows up and apologises for being so rude when he was younger.
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    Congrats on the engagement!

    he just sounds really immature and i'm surprised that no-one called him out for it at the time.

    if you leave it, things will just fester. im sure you could ask your fiance to talk to him to see what happened. you dont want his ugly mug scowling at you dring the wedding!
 
 
 
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