I'm such a mess, whole situation with bf is destroying me. Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 7 years ago
#1
I don't know what to do. I feel so weak and trapped. Me and my boyfriend have been together for around 19months, for the first year and a bit we were so close,then he cheated and things have never been the same. I became paranoid and really emotionally unstable after staying, I regret not leaving when I could. Writing this I feel so pathetic. For the last few months we have been having massive arguments, he threatens me and one time he went to hit me. He expects me to do everything he says. I know the way I've acted has pushed him away and made him treat me like I'm just an object. I get really bad stomach pains from a condition I have,and last week I was in tears because of it, he just stood and laughed at me, which naturally made me angry, so I got mad, and he just continued to laugh, this hurt me, since why would you laugh at someone you love when they're clearly in pain? When we argue, he can keep his cool, im the one crying and getting really upset, it makes me even more upset to the point where I want to hurt myself because of him, because he angers me so much, and he lets me get into that state.
The last four arguments we've had he's tried to break up with me, but I've begged him not to, and he hasn't. I don't want him to break up with me. I want to break up with him, but I want him to hurt because of it, although I know he wont. I just feel so stuck. I know this isn't right, and I know I sound so pathetic, I don't want to be with him, I want to be with someone who loves me and makes me feel special. But I don't have the courage to leave, I don't know what to do. I feel so broken down. Can anyone give me any advice?
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meenu89
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#2
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#2
The piece of advice would be to leave him, and do it right now.
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silverbolt
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#3
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#3
i have no sympathy for you OP as you hold yourself in this obviously bad relationship. You say you should have left when he cheated yet arguably what he is doing is worse yet you are still in it.

Advice - leave
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navarre
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#4
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#4
Get out o it deary.
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teenageclay
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#5
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I don't know what to do. I feel so weak and trapped. Me and my boyfriend have been together for around 19months, for the first year and a bit we were so close,then he cheated and things have never been the same. I became paranoid and really emotionally unstable after staying, I regret not leaving when I could. Writing this I feel so pathetic. For the last few months we have been having massive arguments, he threatens me and one time he went to hit me. He expects me to do everything he says. I know the way I've acted has pushed him away and made him treat me like I'm just an object. I get really bad stomach pains from a condition I have,and last week I was in tears because of it, he just stood and laughed at me, which naturally made me angry, so I got mad, and he just continued to laugh, this hurt me, since why would you laugh at someone you love when they're clearly in pain? When we argue, he can keep his cool, im the one crying and getting really upset, it makes me even more upset to the point where I want to hurt myself because of him, because he angers me so much, and he lets me get into that state.
The last four arguments we've had he's tried to break up with me, but I've begged him not to, and he hasn't. I don't want him to break up with me. I want to break up with him, but I want him to hurt because of it, although I know he wont. I just feel so stuck. I know this isn't right, and I know I sound so pathetic, I don't want to be with him, I want to be with someone who loves me and makes me feel special. But I don't have the courage to leave, I don't know what to do. I feel so broken down. Can anyone give me any advice?
Dump this zero and get yourself a hero love
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IPlayThePiccolo
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#6
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#6
Just get out. You said it yourself, he's violent, manipulative and makes you do/think horrible things. Just finish. Don't think about getting revenge or whatever, just get out before you get hurt.
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Smoosh
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#7
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#7
Leave. Now.
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Tsukuyomi
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#8
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#8
I dont usually tell people to dump their partners, especially people i dont even know.
In your situation, DUMP HIM!!!. I mean come on, im sure your friends have told yu the same
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o Rebecca o
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#9
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#9
(Original post by Anonymous)
I don't know what to do. I feel so weak and trapped. Me and my boyfriend have been together for around 19months, for the first year and a bit we were so close,then he cheated and things have never been the same. I became paranoid and really emotionally unstable after staying, I regret not leaving when I could. Writing this I feel so pathetic. For the last few months we have been having massive arguments, he threatens me and one time he went to hit me. He expects me to do everything he says. I know the way I've acted has pushed him away and made him treat me like I'm just an object. I get really bad stomach pains from a condition I have,and last week I was in tears because of it, he just stood and laughed at me, which naturally made me angry, so I got mad, and he just continued to laugh, this hurt me, since why would you laugh at someone you love when they're clearly in pain? When we argue, he can keep his cool, im the one crying and getting really upset, it makes me even more upset to the point where I want to hurt myself because of him, because he angers me so much, and he lets me get into that state.
The last four arguments we've had he's tried to break up with me, but I've begged him not to, and he hasn't. I don't want him to break up with me. I want to break up with him, but I want him to hurt because of it, although I know he wont. I just feel so stuck. I know this isn't right, and I know I sound so pathetic, I don't want to be with him, I want to be with someone who loves me and makes me feel special. But I don't have the courage to leave, I don't know what to do. I feel so broken down. Can anyone give me any advice?
So...you're begging him to stay with you because you can't stand the thought of him ending the relationship instead of you?

Yes, it does make you sound pathetic.

You have to break up with him, whether he gets hurt or not.

I can't believe you would stay in a relationship like that for a such a stupid reason.

Get a back bone and leave him.
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Anonymous #1
#10
Report Thread starter 7 years ago
#10
Its not just because of that, I do love him, I just want things to return to how they were, but he just acts like a p****
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o Rebecca o
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#11
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Its not just because of that, I do love him, I just want things to return to how they were, but he just acts like a p****

Whether you love him or not, sometimes it's best to leave the person you love for your own safety and happiness.

He clearly doesn't love you because he's cheated and is treating you like crap.

Don't waste your life on him.

Love can be all smoke and mirrors.
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teenageclay
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#12
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#12
Yeah and sounds like you've given him enough chances, take your dignity and leave :\
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Asterix
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#13
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he's abusing the power he visibly has over you, and thats possibly why he's being such a jerk -the whole kid who uses a magnifying glass to burn an ant just because he can and the ant cant do anything? be strong, dont react to his provocations. if you find a way to hide how much it affects you and act like you're done with it he'll be confused and lost -he'll have lost his toy. he might come back all lovey-dovey then, but this would be the exact moment to dump him if you want to "make him hurt because of it". DONT BELIEVE HIM if he says sorry. its manipulative, but it'l hurt his pride even more if you beat him at his own game...

if this seems too hard, leave NOW.
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tinshed
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#14
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#14
pick a day when you will break up with him, plan what you want to say to him (keep it brief) and do it. on your way home buy yourself a giant chocolate cake and eat it all, also invite your girlfriends over to help you finish the cake!
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yamamotootsu
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#15
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#15
Break Up. SImples
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JaiiStarh
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#16
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#16
What advice do you want? It's clear you are not happy in the relationship and he sounds like a prick!
LEAVE HIM!
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o Rebecca o
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#17
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#17
(Original post by tinshed)
pick a day when you will break up with him, plan what you want to say to him (keep it brief) and do it. on your way home buy yourself a giant chocolate cake and eat it all, also invite your girlfriends over to help you finish the cake!
If she eats all the cake then there wont be any left for her friends
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Ministerdonut
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#18
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#18
(Original post by Anonymous)
I don't know what to do. I feel so weak and trapped. Me and my boyfriend have been together for around 19months, for the first year and a bit we were so close,then he cheated and things have never been the same. I became paranoid and really emotionally unstable after staying, I regret not leaving when I could. Writing this I feel so pathetic. For the last few months we have been having massive arguments, he threatens me and one time he went to hit me. He expects me to do everything he says. I know the way I've acted has pushed him away and made him treat me like I'm just an object. I get really bad stomach pains from a condition I have,and last week I was in tears because of it, he just stood and laughed at me, which naturally made me angry, so I got mad, and he just continued to laugh, this hurt me, since why would you laugh at someone you love when they're clearly in pain? When we argue, he can keep his cool, im the one crying and getting really upset, it makes me even more upset to the point where I want to hurt myself because of him, because he angers me so much, and he lets me get into that state.
The last four arguments we've had he's tried to break up with me, but I've begged him not to, and he hasn't. I don't want him to break up with me. I want to break up with him, but I want him to hurt because of it, although I know he wont. I just feel so stuck. I know this isn't right, and I know I sound so pathetic, I don't want to be with him, I want to be with someone who loves me and makes me feel special. But I don't have the courage to leave, I don't know what to do. I feel so broken down. Can anyone give me any advice?
You are mentally ill and need to see your GP and maybe a psychiatrist. You because you want to stay in a relationship with an abusive man ,you talk about the emotions running through your mind because of this relationship, hurting yourself etc etc. Normal people would not put up with living in an abusive relationship and would leave. Seek help.

He also is mentally ill, because normal people do not treat people they care about like this.Normal people do not in stay in relationships with people they treat like dirt.Which is how he treats you.

This relationship is a destructive one, I refuse to place all the blame on him,because you have the choice to leave and haven't. I don't buy the rubbish spouted by the anti male domestic violence industry. Both of you have a need to be in an abusive relationship.And both of you must take responsibility for the situation you have got yourselves in.

leave before something really bad happens.
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tinshed
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#19
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#19
(Original post by o Rebecca o)
If she eats all the cake then there wont be any left for her friends
she should buy two cakes then! : D problem solved!
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Asteria
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#20
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#20
Kick out that abusive jerk !!! What are you waiting for?
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