The Student Room Group

Moving On . . .

Well its going to be 3 months in 3 days that me and my X broke up.
I think ive come along way. Weve tried to remain close friends but kept getting too close and then 2 weeks ago weve kind of lost most contact.
We hardly speak on the phone, she hardly comes online and when we do talk shes just different with me totaly now.

On the comming tuesday its her b/day and also it would have been our 1 year anniversary.
I dont know if I should do anything in terms of getting her a card or present.
Before we went out, we were very good friends and when we finished off we both said we would remain best friends.
I had a conversation couple of days back with her, cause shes been acting depressed. She told me that her b/day is going to be the worst day of her life but when asking if everything is ok she got pissed off. She doesnt want me to care for her or even look out for her at the moment.
I know couple of months back she told me that December is going to be a month where she will act different, without giving me a clue to why.

Its clear she can move on and act all quiet and changed. Im finding it difficult in terms of leaving her alone when there might be somthing majorly wrong. My friends told me to tell her either treat me as a friend and talk like friends do or tell me to piss off.
Ive tried reasoning and understanding her but she is not willing to tell me yet when asking her about remaining friends, she says we are friends but we cannot be best friends again.

The way she is speaking is just weird. She says she hardly talks now a days as shes very busy and thats all she can tell me and if I think differently its down on me.

I feel I should get her a card atleast for her b/day and send it to her but I dont even know where we stand as friends now.
I'd send her the card out of courtesy at least. Then it's up to her what she does. At least then you look like you still want to be friends, and no more than that. It's not your fault if she's going all weird on you.
Reply 2
One thing is im making all the effort to contact her at the moment and I might be annoyeing her in that sense but its only cause im worried. People move on I understand that concept but I cared so much for this person even before we went out and she was my 1st ever Tru Lover so Im just making sure not all is lost.
Reply 3
Send her a card, and write how you feel about her in it. Not the bad things, just write how she makes you feel in a romantic sense.
Jack0
Send her a card, and write how you feel about her in it. Not the bad things, just write how she makes you feel in a romantic sense.


Don't do that. If you are moving on and being friends now just send a card, maybe say you'd like it if you two can become good/close friends again...It does sound like you have discussed that already with her though.

Give her some time, she'll still care about you a lot, just has to have a bit of space so she can move on properly. Me and my ex-gf split up around 3 months ago also, tried to be best friends, that didn't work because it was too soon, so we went throught a period of not speaking much, now we are getting a bit closer again and talking more often with less arguments/bitchy-ness between each other and should be able to be good friends again...

Good luck with it dude, break ups are hard, staying friends at 1st is also hard but theres no reason you cant be good friends again...