Life hanging on by a thread

Hiya recently Ive had a crap couple months. not settling into uni, parents having go at me for not taking it seriously and not getting part time job yet, mates seem to have forgotten me and have suffered from depression. only thing keeping me going was my lovely bf. now this weekends hes said he feels confused bout everything, not sure if he does love me but thinks he does, he thinks might be best to split etc. this is both our first serious relationship and we still do love each other but i dont think we will admit its getting worse. i just feel i couldnt handle splitting up now, with all this going on. we keep talking bout it and we wanna have a great xmas and anniversary (i yr next sat) and we care bout each other tonnes. i just feel this will totally devastate me :frown:

Reply 1

xXMessedUpXx

15

Monkey_Maiden

Hiya recently Ive had a crap couple months. not settling into uni, parents having go at me for not taking it seriously and not getting part time job yet, mates seem to have forgotten me and have suffered from depression. only thing keeping me going was my lovely bf. now this weekends hes said he feels confused bout everything, not sure if he does love me but thinks he does, he thinks might be best to split etc. this is both our first serious relationship and we still do love each other but i dont think we will admit its getting worse. i just feel i couldnt handle splitting up now, with all this going on. we keep talking bout it and we wanna have a great xmas and anniversary (i yr next sat) and we care bout each other tonnes. i just feel this will totally devastate me :frown:

Hey,
sorry you're having a touch time recently. You have got a lot on your mind, and its ok to admit that sometimes thats hard to cope with. I sufer from depression too, and also split from a long term bf a few weeks ago. I know that it would feel like the worse thing in the world, adn i know that having depression can make such a thing 10x worse. It is very hard to admit a relationship isn't working, but at least the two of you are mature enough to be able to accept that. If you carry on, it could very well get worse. In these situations i'd advise that you hope for the best, and plan for the worse.

If the worst does happen, although you will need time to get over it (this couls take a few weeks, months etc) , as hard as it would be try and limit the time. Try not to spend all you're time alone. Friends have a habit of being supportive attimes like this, even if you feel they seem to have forgotton you right now. Maybe throw yourself into trying to get a new job, or into uni. It may be worth talking to your parents. Depression can make settleing into uni a very difficult process, and if they are aware of this you could maybe have their support.

When i split with my ex, i wasn't in a good why. he just so happened to lave me at the height of my depression. I was drinking alone a lot, and also started self harming again. And one night was suicidal (that was drink fuelled). Although there would be the temptation to give up, to say you don't care anymore, and although it feels like the end of the world. It won't always feel like that. Remind yourself of that everyday. If you do decide to split, well try and make your anniverdsary/xmas a happy memory, adnd its always better to split on good terms.

No idea if any of that helps hun, just try and remember to take care of yourself. Whatever happens remeber that "to see the rainbow you must first go through the rain"

Reply 2

Lucia-Peachy

Monkey_Maiden

Hiya recently Ive had a crap couple months. not settling into uni, parents having go at me for not taking it seriously and not getting part time job yet, mates seem to have forgotten me and have suffered from depression. only thing keeping me going was my lovely bf. now this weekends hes said he feels confused bout everything, not sure if he does love me but thinks he does, he thinks might be best to split etc. this is both our first serious relationship and we still do love each other but i dont think we will admit its getting worse. i just feel i couldnt handle splitting up now, with all this going on. we keep talking bout it and we wanna have a great xmas and anniversary (i yr next sat) and we care bout each other tonnes. i just feel this will totally devastate me :frown:

In a way I don't feel qualified to comment because I'm only 18, but I have just started uni too and I have been through a really really tough time too. What you have to see is that against all odds if the worst happens you have the rest of your life to live and discover new and exciting things, although it may seem that there is no hope and everything is one big black cloud you have a lot to offer the world, and even though you may see it impossible there are other me that will love you - how you want to be loved - and care for you, maybe your bf is that person, if not it will be somebody else. xxx

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there are other men* that'll love you

Reply 3

Ferrus

19

This first term at university has been tough for me too, just keep on hanging on, it may get better with time

Reply 4

Misogynist

18

It'll pass. Nothing to worry about. Solitude is a good place to visit, It'll re-synchronise your inner compass.

Life hanging on by a thread

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