Computer Science - last paragraph Watch

Revelation
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I am extremely excited about university and what it can offer me. I look forward to the challenge of university life, learning and gaining a greater understanding of how computers work and to experience the social side. This will hopefully stand me in good stead to secure a job in the IT sector. I hope I can bring my academic and real life experiences of IT together, coupled with my enthusiasm for the subject to enable me to enjoy and succeed at degree level in Computer Science.
I know its pretty important, so what do you think for a last paragraph? Constructive critiscism welcome.

Thanks in advance, Rev
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moojoo
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The final sentence is good, I'm not sure about other bits like "what it can offer me", nor "and to experience the social side". Although these are true and valid, I'm not sure they're they best things you could write.
Perhaps try and end with something about what youcan offer the uni instead, and leave off the bit about socialising, everyone loves socialising, no need to say it
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gianthead
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not everyone loves socialising, you might be a miserable student who hides away with their books, what uni would want one of those?
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Amritakkaur
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(Original post by gianthead)
not everyone loves socialising, you might be a miserable student who hides away with their books, what uni would want one of those?
Oxbridge :p:
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Akhoza
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(Original post by Amritakkaur)
Oxbridge :p:
im guessing thats a joke since your applying there :rolleyes:
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arktos
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I am extremely excited about university and what it can offer me. I look forward to the challenge of university life, learning and gaining a greater understanding of how computers work and to experience the social side. This will hopefully stand me in good stead to secure a job in the IT sector. I hope I can bring my academic and real life experiences of IT together, coupled with my enthusiasm for the subject to enable me to enjoy and succeed at degree level in Computer Science.


I am extremely excited about University, and look forward to it's inherant challenges and rewards. Interacting with new and varied people will give me a valuable social perspective and allow me to share my knowledge and skills, whilst futhering my own. I hope I can bring my academic and (practical/real-life?) experiences of IT together and couple it with my passion and enthusiasm for the subject, alolowing me to enjoy and suceed in the degree course.
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Akhoza
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(Original post by arktos)
I am extremely excited about university and what it can offer me. I look forward to the challenge of university life, learning and gaining a greater understanding of how computers work and to experience the social side. This will hopefully stand me in good stead to secure a job in the IT sector. I hope I can bring my academic and real life experiences of IT together, coupled with my enthusiasm for the subject to enable me to enjoy and succeed at degree level in Computer Science.


I am extremely excited about University, and look forward to it's inherant challenges and rewards. Interacting with new and varied people will give me a valuable social perspective and allow me to share my knowledge and skills, whilst futhering my own. I hope I can bring my academic and (practical/real-life?) experiences of IT together and couple it with my passion and enthusiasm for the subject, alolowing me to enjoy and suceed in the degree course.
wow thats great, did you do that on the spot- if so do you do A level english :confused: or something
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arktos
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Scraped a C at GCSE. was on the spot, but it's not that great lol.
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