The Student Room Group

dating

I gave my number to a guy in a bar yesterday evening, and he called today to arrange to meetup tomorrow. Ive been single for like 3 years (i know.. :s-smilie:), and never gone on a "date" with someone I wasnt going out with before. Thing is, Im interested in another guy, alot, but he's in the process of a breakup blah blah long story, so I dont think I'll be interested in this guy as well, but want to see, and if not then be friends. What if there is no conversation? Would it be reaally bad to tell my friends which pub we're going into and "bump into" them an hour or so in? Then they could check him out too.. but is it rude?
Also. The guy I like was with me when this guy called, and said we'd better not start dating.. if you were unavailable but knew a girl liked you, and she went on a casual date, whatd you be thinking/feeling?
Reply 1
well if you're unavailable you a) shouldnt be feeling anything or b) shouldnt be unavailable.

and the friends in the pub thing is a bad idea - it'll be so blatently organised it'll just be embarrassing. You can always get a friend to call you an hour or so in for the cliched get out clause.
Reply 2
burningwings
I gave my number to a guy in a bar yesterday evening, and he called today to arrange to meetup tomorrow. Ive been single for like 3 years (i know.. :s-smilie:)
I hear ya. Similar boat myself.

burningwings
so I dont think I'll be interested in this guy as well, but want to see,
Then by all means. Go on the date with him. See, explore. It might be nothing now but you obviously have some attraction to him since you gave him your number. If it doesn't work out then no biggey..

burningwings
and if not then be friends.
No offense but I don't think he'll find this much of a consolation prize.. Best to "say" lets just be friends, but in a polite way that it's obvious you don't really mean it. Cruel? Not imo, infact if I was in his shoes id far prefer this honest answer. Or then again maybe I just have enough friends.

burningwings
What if there is no conversation? Would it be reaally bad to tell my friends which pub we're going into and "bump into" them an hour or so in? Then they could check him out too.. but is it rude?
YES!!! That is very rude! And if he has any intelligence he'll see right through it. Let me ask you something. Say you meet up with him and you find you like him. So, if he is good enough for you... then, why does he have to be good enough for your friends as well? :confused:

If there is no conversation, just make an excuse and leave. Then if he texts you, mention that you didn't feel a spark or chemistry or something and that "surely" he noticed it's lack too. Lets just be friends (ugh I hate that line :rolleyes: ) etc. etc.

burningwings
Also. The guy I like was with me when this guy called, and said we'd better not start dating..
Oooooh a complication! I like it. This reminds me of a sitcom. You realise he doesn't have to be aware of your dating practices? Infact I'd advise you do your best to keep it from him. Then should anything go awry, you're still available in his eyes.

burningwings
if you were unavailable but knew a girl liked you, and she went on a casual date, whatd you be thinking/feeling?
This could all be avoided by his not knowing. But I'll answer anyhow.
What I'd be thinking would entirely depend on whether I was interested in her or not. If I liked her I'd be jealous and disheartened. If I knew she liked me more than this guy I'd be thinking about how to subtely make it apparent that I liked her too, to stop them becoming a couple. If I knew nothing was gonna come from it then it wouldn't bother me much. But it would might make her seem more dateable. We do want more what may soon be out of our grasp.

If I wasn't interested, then I'm obviously enjoying the attention of having a girl interested in me without wanting to go out with her. I'd be a little dissappointed at the prospect of that attention being lost but oh well, wouldn't concern me much.