The Student Room Group

Odd change in demeanor. What to make of it?

Suppose I'll give the full story as objectively as I can.

I used to train with this girl back when I was in school (almost 4 years now). Now no "impure thoughts" entered my mind back then as she was a few years younger than me. When we talked (rarely enough) it seemed very awkward, which I found odd at the time since the awkwardness was not coming from me.

She was in my younger brother's class and they had their graduation party this year. My brother told me she came up to him and asked a load of questions about me, saying that she knew me. So I put two and two together and got an idea that maybe she liked me. But still, kid in my brothers class. Didn't think much about it.

Then a couple months ago I was told in passing by someone that she was going to the same uni as me. This changed my perspective entirely. Suddenly she was a college girl, 19 (I'm 22). I began to think about her and even started spending more time around the end of college she studied in such that a "chance" encounter might occur. This was not successful and soon term was over.

So anyway I'm right outside college, out of term, in Dublin city centre doing a bit of xmas shopping. On the phone to my dad and suddenly there she is and she walks up and starts talking to me while I'm on the phone. Confused I quickly finish talking to my dad have a bit of a friendly chit-chat. Turns out she is working in some shop and is on her lunch. Now I'm nervous, this was unexpected and she caught me off-guard. So I say I have to rush but could we meet up for lunch some time. She says "Sure! Give me your number." We exchanged no.s and she suggests to have it in the new year when term starts again. This was a week ago.

Today I had yet to get a present for my mum. It occured to me that the shop she worked in was the perfect place to get it. Headed in early to beat the bustle, got to her at the counter present in hand, had a bit more friendly small-talk, a lot of eye contact. Then as I'm leaving I asked if we we're still on for lunch in the new year to which she replied "Yeah definitely!". So I said smiling "good, I look forward to it" and left. I went into college (accross the street) and spent much of the day studying. Librarys close early out of term so I went to our 24hour reading room which is mostly full of computers but had some deskspace that I used. Had enough of study about 7pm. Turned around and saw a friend of mine on one of the computers so I went up and had a chat with him. While chatting (quietly :wink:) I realise that sitting beside him on another computer is this girl! So I said her name but no response came, I said it a little louder and she did acknowledge me. So I walked over and crouched beside her for a quick chat "How are you". She stares straight ahead at the screen and says "Oh fine.. em.. I'm..." points at the screen and resumes typing furiously. OKAY, I've been snubbed, I can take a hint. I stand up saying "right.. I'll leave you to it". Said bye to my friend and quickly departed.

I was very surprised by it. It was quite abrupt and unexpected considering previous behaviour. And made me look a bit the fool. Initially I couldn't fathom why. I thought up a few possible reasons on the bus home but they're so different. Really I need other people's opinions.

A: She's not interested, only realised my intentions were more than just friendly when I said "good, I look forward to it". And now she's giving me the cold shoulder.

B: She thinks I'm following her. I'm not.

C: She was actually doing something that required immediate attention. I didn't pry and stare at the screen. But from what I could tell seeing it in peripheral vision, it was a colourful website (so not college related). And she was writing something large into a text box (much like I'm doing now) but I don't think it was a forum. So this doesn't seem to be the case...

D: She was embarrassed by what she was writing/looking at and didn't want me to see it, or have to explain it to me. Maybe she was writing something similar to what I am now? :wink:

E: She smelled, she was working hard all day through the christmas rush and felt she was in a bit of a state and didn't want me near her out of embarrassment. Perfectly understandable if it's the case.

F: She's weird. And by that I mean she considers interrupting somebody on the phone is more acceptable than interrupting somebody typing.

G: I'm being stupid, irrational and over-analysing. Possible, but I'd still like your opinions. I haven't been in a relationship in quite a while and this girl is the only decent prospect I've had of recent. First singledom was fun, I'm so sick of it now though, it's become a joke.

So what do yous reckon? Could it be one of them or something else? How likely/unlikely are they? I still intend on fulfilling the lunch date in the new year but do yis reckon I should? If so how should I approach it?

Thanks (and sorry about the length :redface: )
Reply 1
C,D and G. You are obviously in love with this girl, which is making you stupid and irrational. Be honest and open, if you play it cool then you could drift apart forever.
Reply 2
Strangely enough this happened to me recently... I tend to go like that around guys who meet me randomly without me expecting it, and I tend to appear like I don't want to talk to them, when in fact I was just self conscious!

I definitely think she doesn't have negative feelings towards you. I think she actually is a bit shy possibly, and she was probably just nervous because you appeared so suddenly. Also the fact that your friend was there she was probably even more embarrassed!

I definitely think she still likes you!
Reply 3
Esquire
You are obviously in love with this girl,
:eek: I wouldn't go that far! I hardly know her.

I like her, she attracts me. She's very intelligent and talented. But love.? I mean I may even be a little infatuated but it's far from love.. yet at least. Thanks for the rest of the insight though.

anonymous
I definitely think she still likes you!
Heh.. I hope so. Thanks for the insight. Helped a lot :smile: From what I know of her it makes sense that she might be shy, she was a small bit reclusive in school i think. Didn't come across in any way extroverted that's certain.
Reply 4
green day - road to pasalacqua (the soundtrack of my adolescence)