Anxiety experiences and support

That sounds horrible. Why did hearing about that make you feel this way?

Because I still love him... despite everything he did to me, was a three year relationship, and now we are apart he really doesn't give two ****s. It's like I never existed. He knows every intimate detail about me, and now hes off partying and god knows what and all I can think is that he will get with someone tomorrow night, and I would actually.lose.my.mind.

I'm really sorry to hear that. I'm not very experienced in the relationship stakes So I probably can't be much help to you, except to say we're here for you and (if I may) he doesn't sound like the kind of **** who deserves to go out with you.

(excuse me)

Thanks Everything started really.. like my panic attacks and our relationship failing when I was in first year of uni, I got taken advantage of on two seperate occasions by two different guys. I wont say rape because I was really drunk.. I put myself in that position so it was my fault, and gradually I could start to remember bits of it. I've always believed in telling the truth, and so I told him, and he was obviously really upset.. but overtime it just became clear that he didnt believe a word I was saying and he thinks I willingly slept with them.. and thats why we broke up, well on his half, because he couldnt trust me, despite me telling him the truth there was nothing more I could say... and I couldnt handle him lying to me all the time.. like this exact day last year i had taken him out for a meal because he said that the next day he wanted to see his friends but he would still come over for his present and stuff through the day.. except he didnt and i rang and rang and got no reply.. it got to tuesday and i eventually rang his house and his brother let slip that he had gone to amsterdam...and not told me. Just loads of stuff like that.. saying hes not working when he was.. and just gradually worrying constantly where he was and what he was doing for three years wore me down to a nervous wreck.. I just cant stand thethought of him going out and having a good time without a single thought for me...

Well, all that sounds really insensitive of him. Although I understand that when you love someone, you love them, it sounds as if you are better off without the constant worries on your shoulders that you had when you were with him. I'm sure he will be thinking of you tomorrow, if anything, he might be more likely to 'get with' someone else because of missing you. All i mean is, you never can tell what's going on in someone else's head.

I have this sort of dream that when he comes by this weekend to give me the money he owes me he will sort of... want me back, want to talk and stuff but i just dont ever see that happening..

I think its perfectly understandable for you to think about that sort of thing, but it's best to realise that time never goes backwards. His part in your life is over, gone to make room for the next, better, part.

Ahh you speak so much sense..

Sometimes it takes someone else to say it for you to realise it's true.

And I need my head knocking against something very hard for sense to be knocked into me sometimes! I need to read through this thread.. havent actually done so yet I dont think..

My therapist says deep thinkers like me (and you by the sounds of it) have more anxiety but also more fulfilling lives - I like the sound of that

The trouble with medication is not so much the taking it, but the side effects of the actual drug so the form it is in doesn't make much difference to my fear

I am also scared of going to sleep - related to my general fear of losing control, so I usually try to stay awake as late as possible, and rarely get a good night's sleep unless I can stay in bed undisturbed late into the morning...

I have never noticed a 'monthly' fluctuation... although my cycle tends to be quite irregular, veering to nonexistent due to my weight. (ahem.. too much info there sorry)

There's some inspiring and interesting stuff. I've been managing to read every post so far.

Sometimes it takes someone else to say it for you to realise it's true.

Fear of loosing control is something I can so relate to. That's why I don't drink!

I like the way your therapist puts it.

I get really bad anxiety (panic attacks etc.) during sex . I hate how I was raped and abused, and I hate how it hurts my bf but I just can't do it :'(

I get really bad anxiety (panic attacks etc.) during sex . I hate how I was raped and abused, and I hate how it hurts my bf but I just can't do it :'(

I have stress related anxiety and seem to have high adrenaline levels which cause me to be a bit light headed and dizzy, it gets to be a pain but I'm trying to reduce the anxiety with a better diet and exercise hopefully.

But I was wondering if it was normal to feel light headed when moving and slightly tired.