The Student Room Group

Afraid of the dark at my age!

Hi. Since I was about 3 years old I have always slept at my nans, and cos we were in a rough patch, I had to sleep with her in her bed, cos it was a one bedroom flat. I am now 17 and still can not sleep on my own.

Since then I rarely sleep at my mothers and if I do have to spend the night at her place, I do not sleep, ans stay awake all night. At once stage I had to have perscibed sleeping pills from my GP when I had to stay for a week...

I also have a fear of the dark and will drive myself crazy with parasonoia if I have to sleep at my mum or nans on my own in a room in the dark.

however, when I go on residentials I am fine. Own bed in the dark no probs. good night sleep.

At the age of 17 it is very depressing to still have to kip with ya nan, and I was woundering if anyone had any advice on how to move on.
Reply 1
Mail order bride?
I am female.
Reply 3
foxo
Mail order bride?


am female and can not afford the postage.
Reply 4
You must become one with dark, find your inner dark being :wink: . I love the dark, you could prowl around like a leapord
Reply 5
What is it that scares you?
Reply 6
Cannot you not try sleeping on your own with the light on, and then once you are used to that try it with a dimmer light. Then you could turn the light out but leave the door open a bit, and eventually no light at all?

Although I appreciate it will be scary, I think the sleeping by yourself thing is something that you have to plunge yourself into. I can't think of any intermediate steps you could take to make the 'transition' easier.
I love the dark... hmm... so therefore, I don't understand your problem and can offer no solution. My only suggestion is, learn to love the dark, because it rucking focks.
Reply 8
Toy Soldier
I love the dark... hmm... so therefore, I don't understand your problem and can offer no solution. My only suggestion is, learn to love the dark, because it rucking focks.


LOL!!!
You sound like a big baby.
Reply 10
You need to go and see a psychiatrist i think.

Convalescent
You sound like a big baby.


You need to stop being a penis i think.
Rather than just lying there fretting... have you tried immersing yourself in a good book or listening to your favourite CD, maybe get a TV and try to keep your mind occupied! That way you'll drift off peacefully when you get tired enough... or *brainwave* cuddle up to a hot water bottle! Always very comforting!! mmmmm :biggrin:
Elipsis
You need to go and see a psychiatrist i think.



You need to stop being a penis i think.


Well, it is a case of getting a grip of oneself, he/she was babysitted since they were 3 and once this protection leaves them they have nothing but fear and have trouble dealing with it.
Become a goth. All goths love the dark - if only because it's the only time you can't see their acne.
Reply 14
Anonymous
You must become one with dark, find your inner dark being :wink: . I love the dark, you could prowl around like a leapord
well said...
Reply 15
Is there a possibility that you had a horrific childhood event that involved the dark? I think you should take it one step at a time. Firstly, don't get stressed out on the thought of sleeping alone... stress is what keeps many people up at night! Maybe have a lock on your door so you know that nothing can get in at you while you're sleeping? Sleep with the light on to begin with, get one of those dimming lights so every night/week you could make the light a little dimmer until you are fine when it's dark! Is it the dark you are afraid of or the idea of being alone? If it is being alone, you could always get an old teddy and use it as comfort... I wouldn't call owning a teddy as childish, I have loads!

As for the guy who mentioned "goths" and "acne", I get called a goth and I have always had perfectly clear skin :p:
Reply 16
i kno its probably really hard but try to remember u actually have nothing to be scared of and if uve done it on residentials, so u have done it b4 so u will be able to again.

and if the darks such a problem keep the light on whats the harm in that.

also if ive had a really stressful day and my minds buzzing when i get to bed, i usually jus focus on thinking about nothing, clearing my mind of all thoughts kind of like a meditation i suppose jus to chill down a bit.

on second thoughts u could try meditation, i hear its quite relaxing, worth a shot if u want to sort it out

gd luck!
Reply 17
get a bf.shagg him in dark, so you can get used to dark places.hope it helps!
Reply 18
I think you have a mild form of separation anxiety, you feel like you need the protection of your grandmother because you associate your mother's home as an unsafe place to be. Other places are more neutral, so that's why you have no problem sleeping there. In my (non-professional) opinion, a little bit of counselling wouldn't go amiss, to help you identify and rationalise your specific fears, and to help you deal with them.

As for being afraid of the dark... I'm absolutely terrified of the dark, it freaks the bejeezus out of me. Again, its a paranoia and insecurity thing, and possibly being afraid of things that you can't see. A nightlight might help.