The Student Room Group

younger brother smoking

as the title suggests, my younger brother's just started to smoke. he is 16 so there's nothing illegal about it. furthermore, i know that it's not that bad because there are so many other things which people at his age do that are worse.

that said, i have a feeling that he only started in the last few weeks because his girlfriend, or some other comrade in this new circle of friends, smokes as well. so that element of peer pressure is quite disturbing because there's no reason why it couldn't extend to other things one day. another issue is that it's not just social smoking as he's also doing it in the house, well, out the window/in the garden, and the parents don't know.

i know that people are free to do what they want and that i shouldn't interfere, but people can go on smoking for years, even their entire life. as it probably gets harder and harder to stop with time, i suppose that now would be the best time for him to stop.

i suppose i am worrying and making a fuss a bit too much in some people's opinions, but as his older brother (probably slightly biased as i myself have never been inclined to smoke), i do feel a) protective of his innocence and b) probably one of the most influential people in his eyes.

so, are there any ways to handle the situation tactfully?

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Reply 1
Explain to him the consequences, my little brother smokes (i think) and i've sat down and told him that people try to avoid cancer, yet he's doing something which can trigger it. Tell him the cost, my way of doing this was to say if you smoked 10 a day for a whole year, you'd spend £900. Which is 1/3rd of his wages at his part time job. That £900 could be spent on a holiday, or a car.


If he doesn't listen then, just make it clear your not happy with it, I.E tell him he smells of smoke, not to smoke near you, not to smoke in the garden whilst he's there, etc etc...
Have you asked him why he's started? Maybe if you did and he couldn't think of an answer he'd realise it's kinda silly.
Reply 3
does he smoke alone or only around other people?
I think it's clear from the first post that he smokes both alone and with other people.
Reply 5
well the only times i've sort of caught him smoking are alone - over the last week he's been smoking quite a bit out of the window in his room, and just before when my mum said he'd gone into the garden (in the freezing cold) to play his guitar, i went out to have a look and he had his fags with him. so definitely alone and i can only assume that he smokes around others too.
Reply 6
Why is it any of your business if he smokes?!

Oh it's because your "older" and have rights over him. :rolleyes:
Reply 7
Because zooropa, he loves his brother, and only wants his well-being...
unfortunatly no one loves you so you dont know what its like :p:
Reply 8
zooropa
Why is it any of your business if he smokes?!

Oh it's because your "older" and have rights over him. :rolleyes:


heaven forbid he should care about his brother?! :rolleyes:

silence - out of interest, do your parents have any idea he is smoking?
Just take him aside and have a chat with him about why he's started, outline the issues that creepy1986 did, say that you'd willingly support him if he wants to stop and that there are various ways he could do so.

Other than that, it's his choice :smile:
Reply 9
silence
as the title suggests, my younger brother's just started to smoke. he is 16 so there's nothing illegal about it. furthermore, i know that it's not that bad because there are so many other things which people at his age do that are worse.

that said, i have a feeling that he only started in the last few weeks because his girlfriend, or some other comrade in this new circle of friends, smokes as well. so that element of peer pressure is quite disturbing because there's no reason why it couldn't extend to other things one day. another issue is that it's not just social smoking as he's also doing it in the house, well, out the window/in the garden, and the parents don't know.

i know that people are free to do what they want and that i shouldn't interfere, but people can go on smoking for years, even their entire life. as it probably gets harder and harder to stop with time, i suppose that now would be the best time for him to stop.

i suppose i am worrying and making a fuss a bit too much in some people's opinions, but as his older brother (probably slightly biased as i myself have never been inclined to smoke), i do feel a) protective of his innocence and b) probably one of the most influential people in his eyes.

so, are there any ways to handle the situation tactfully?


1:colone:xplain to him the consequences of smoking, and if he says "oh that will only happen if i smoke like 30 a day" tell him its aload of crap whoever said that.

2:Ask him why he started smoking, of course if its due to peer pressure hes not going to give a good answer, if you feel it is due to pressure try and explain to him that he shouldn't have to change who he is to please others.

3:Maybe hes started smoking because hes suffering from stress for somereason, so maybe you could try and find out if anythings troubling him?
Reply 10
zooropa
Why is it any of your business if he smokes?!

Oh it's because your "older" and have rights over him. :rolleyes:


I know it can be difficult to bring these things up with your family but it is definitely important that somebody tries to make him see sense. I guarantee his brother would be thanking him later on in life :smile:
Reply 11
sarforaz
Because zooropa, he loves his brother, and only wants his well-being...
:


There is a difference between caring and letting someone else live their own life.
Reply 12
zooropa
There is a difference between caring and letting someone else live their own life.


..or, more appropriately, letting them smoke themselves to an early death.
Reply 13
If so, then so be it.
Reply 14
Maybe you should talk to him and if that doesn't work, then tell the parents-I'm sure they'd stop it. At the end of the day whatever your parents do when they find out, it's far less worse then him getting cancer. He wouldn't even have to know that you told them, just ask them to say that they smelt smoke on him or something and suspect it. Good Luck! x
Reply 15
My parents thought my younger brother was drinking too much (arguably they are just naive about how much people drink nowadays though!) Anyway, I decided to have a chat with him and just tell him that it's not a good idea to get totally pissed and to be a bit careful. So anyway, to the OP, I would recommend you just have a chat with him - try to talk to him as a brother rather than a parent-figure. My brother's only about a year and a half younger but I like to think that to some extent he looks up to me. I think he took it on board. It's really sweet that you care enough (whatever idiots like Zooropa say!)
Reply 16
leave poor smoker ed alone! and do not tell your mum. :p:
Reply 17
Buy 3 packs of cigarettes and make him smoke all of them at once...that should do it. And if that doesn't work, beat him, as long as you don't leave a bruise (evidence).
Reply 18
well said! barbie

When i started smoking the first thing my little brother did was grass me to my mum. That just made me continue to smoke due to me being a 14 year old male and therefore doing the oposite to what your parents say.

Talk to him about it but dont try and inflict anything on him.
Just a point is that it is actualy realy easy to give up smoking, The only thing is that you have to realy want to. The hard thing is staying given up!
Reply 19
haha he gave in to peer pressure. he must be weak.

tell your folks and let them sort it.