The Student Room Group

getting friends

im an 18 yo boy, going to university in a few months and i suffer from social anxiety that means meeting people in v. difficult. :frown:

i live quite a way from my college, n i have very few friends and its really getting me down. i cant really get a job as i don't have any time, so how would i go about meeting people? i feel lonely and a right loser for not really having anyone and i find social situations soooo difficult especially pubs etc...
You just need to become more confident in yourself. Why do you find social situations difficult? It'll be easier at uni cause you'll be in halls, everyone will be alot closer to you than at the moment if you live far away from college. Join some clubs and things there and everything'll be fine :smile:
Reply 2
Advice for at uni for whenever you course starts.

when you get there, find out/register with the local NHS place, ask them about getting treatment for Social Anxiety Disorder.
Look for any local clubs or events for people who have it etc.

And take your time at uni, people will understand if you are slow to settle in the first few weeks. Try meeting your flat mates one on one first if that helps. just having one or two minutes conversations with each person should help you feel more comfortable when your all in a group.

Getting a job in a pub might help, i know of someone who had it, social anxiety, and it pretty much cured him working there.
Reply 3
everyone is so optimistic here i love it :p:

You just need to become more confident in yourself. Why do you find social situations difficult?


its hard to describe. i just get very nervous (and shake loads) in situations where im worried etc. and go v. quiet. makes things really hard to meet new people. i worry i look stupid whether i do or don't and i feel like im being judged all of the time.

i hope uni will be better cause like at the moment sucks


when you get there, find out/register with the local NHS place, ask them about getting treatment for Social Anxiety Disorder.
Look for any local clubs or events for people who have it etc.


i might do that. thanks for the advice. the idea of a group of people all having sad is funny though cause i cant imagine they talk much...

i really cant imagine getting a job in a pub. i can barely go in one at the moment so i dont think id be upto getting a job there
i always felt like that - hated any kind of social situation and litreally had no friends. i thought i was some kind of freak who couldn't even hold a normal conversation.

But came to uni, and met loads of people who are on my wavelength. i have found that its just being with the right people that makes you come out of yourself, and also having a fresh start. i had give myself such a repuation that i couldn't get out of it, while i was at school. I started uni and just made myself talk to people, and it really worked. now i have wonderful friends and a lovely boyfriend. Talking to strangers will seem hard at first but they'll be just a shy as you when u start at a new place.

Good luck and i hope you find the confidence in you!
Reply 5
thanks for the reply. hopefully university will end at least some of my woes! i'll look forward to it,
Reply 6
I got the same problem as this chap - you aint alone buddy! Hoping its gonna change when I head off to uni ! :smile:
Reply 7
Anonymous
I got the same problem as this chap - you aint alone buddy! Hoping its gonna change when I head off to uni ! :smile:



same