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Should I tell my girlfriend I kissed another girl whilst drunk?

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Best keep quiet, it really doesn't matter that much, but telling her may cause a major drama ridden overreaction.
Reply 61
All relationships end anyway, you might as well tell her, break up, move on.
Original post by An Aspiring Guy
So you're justifying his unfaithfulness with the reason: "She's probably done it herself."

Yes.
Original post by An Aspiring Guy

If you can't see how warped your way of thinking is then I feel sorry for you. You're the type of people who give good guys a bad rep.

Don't feel sorry for me, Feel sorry for yourselves.
For the love of god dont tell her. What good could possibly come out of it? You will either break up or you will remain together and she will have trust issues with you. It was months ago, you were drunk, you never saw her again. Just leave it in the past and forget it.
Original post by Rei-san
As a girl, I would much rather be told by my boyfriend rather than finding out from someone else.


This.

I found out that my boyfriend kissed someone else (at the beginning of university), off a friend, about 3/4months after it happened. I would have definitely rather have found out off him at the time than being told by a friend who found out through gossip, it wasn't very nice and sometimes, it wedges itself in the back of my mind.

OP - if you're ABSOLUTELY sure there is no way it's going to get out, then I would leave it and not tell a soul. Otherwise, if you have told someone about it, I'd get it over and done with yourself and spare her the pain. From personal experience, I'm still wondering why he didn't tell me straight away, after telling one of the most gossip-ridden girls in our year... /facepalm.
Reply 65
Original post by Anonymous
Basically, a few months back I was on a night out and I kissed a girl. Nothing else came of it, I walked away and didn't see her again. I was pretty drunk, which is no excuse really, and I've felt awful since whenever I think about it. I've been with my girlfriend for over 2 years now, she lives in the same town as me and we go to Uni at the same place. We've not had any trouble with either of us cheating before, but I admit I've felt attracted to other girls but not done anything about it (also whilst I'm drunk). Is this a sign I don't love my girlfriend as much as I think I do? Should I tell her about the kiss and hope that she knows it meant nothing, or should I keep it quiet and hope the couple of mates that know about it won't ever tell her either?



No, take it to your ****ing grave.
Reply 66
Dont tell her if it genoinly wont happen again and u know u love her. She will honestly never be able to trust u or look at u the same way again. It will come up and be thrown in your face in every argument. my ex kissed another girl and was really sorry and we stayed together but everytime we argued, i threw it in his face. we eventually decided we cudnt get past it and broke up. My advice, dont tell her if u truly love her and dont want to see her heartbroken.
Original post by An Aspiring Guy
I'll dumb it down for you: your way of thinking is warped and it make decent guys [who don't think in such a sick way] look bad. I never suggested you were a good guy to begin with. Comprende?


Would you like to go down on me?
As it was a few months back I doubt anyone else remembers it really. Don't tell her.
Reply 69
Original post by Anonymous
Basically, a few months back I was on a night out and I kissed a girl. Nothing else came of it, I walked away and didn't see her again. I was pretty drunk, which is no excuse really, and I've felt awful since whenever I think about it. I've been with my girlfriend for over 2 years now, she lives in the same town as me and we go to Uni at the same place. We've not had any trouble with either of us cheating before, but I admit I've felt attracted to other girls but not done anything about it (also whilst I'm drunk). Is this a sign I don't love my girlfriend as much as I think I do? Should I tell her about the kiss and hope that she knows it meant nothing, or should I keep it quiet and hope the couple of mates that know about it won't ever tell her either?


what happens when you're drunk should stay when you were drunk...
I would really like to know what ended up happenings.... I'm in the same situation... My bf cheated my kissing a girl.. He told me that she got dared to kiss him but he was drunk and caught up in the moment... He claims he left right afterwards because he supposedly felt guilty... But when he got home from work he didn't even make it upstairs but passed out on the couch and I could smell the alcohol on his breath... I woke him up to come to bed.. He passed out the second his head hit the pillow and To me something felt wrong/off so I know I shouldn't have but I grabbed his phone and I read a couple of text messages to his friend co-worker which was talking about the group of girls that he was with... Do guys all talk like that to each other?? Anyways what I read made me cry.. He woke up after a couple hours when he notice I was crying then I Asked him if he cheated on me and why he smells like alcohol when he was suppose to be working... He got quite sat up and said the text weren't true but I did kiss her I'm soo sorry.. And has been trying to convince me that it won't happen again and he regrets ever doing it... To me I have no peace of mind when he is home his touch makes me hurt from the thought of what he did... And when he is at work I'm that paranoid gf who thinks of what is he really doing since it all happened at his work place. I dont text him like crazy about it but at home im going crazy about it. He also says it was the alcohol and says that he won't drink if I'm not there. It's only been a couple of days since it happened but I still don't know what to do. You see I'm pregnant and the baby is due in 7 weeks.. It's really hard for me to control my feeling or let go of things because of the extra hormones...he whispers he is sorry every night before bed.. I just don't know what to do I feel so hurt and heartbroken and I feel if he really cares about me then the thought of me and his baby would be enough to not do anything stupid like this... Any opinions please..
Tell her.

Seriously, my BF kissed his ex (drunk at a party) I found out off someone else then made him tell me and (no surprise) got two very different stories.
But we're still together because once I'd got him to tell me I was fine with it.
You were drunk, unless she's super jealous, she should be ok.
Reply 72
I'm having to deal Withyham exact issue right now.
Kissed a random girl at a club.

Got a guilty conscious. Have always told her everything because lies and secrets ruin a relationship... But I'm scared telling her will end the relationship or make her doubt my loyalty.
Once a cheater always a cheater!

If you were decent you would tell you girlfriend and immediately break up with her as she deserves more than a cheater, unless she is a cheater herself. Any man who cheats but tries to remain in the relationship after using any excuse does not deserve the relationship.

EDIT: @Pao1o Just realised this thread is two years old. What?
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Pao1o
I'm having to deal Withyham exact issue right now.
Kissed a random girl at a club.

Got a guilty conscious. Have always told her everything because lies and secrets ruin a relationship... But I'm scared telling her will end the relationship or make her doubt my loyalty.


isn't this a post from 2011? >.>

I'd tell her if I were you. You said yourself lies and secrets ruin relationships, and if it does ruin it then it's kinda your fault, but trust me, she'll find out eventually and then it'll be worse. You've got a fighting chance if you tell her yourself :smile: And if it does make her doubt your loyalty, then, you know, you did kiss a random girl at a club so it's sensible for her to.

Original post by Madeline_H95
Just realised this thread is two years old. What?

better yet, it's 4 years old :K:
(edited 8 years ago)
Obviously yes you need to tell her
Tell her admit you f'ed up and be prepared to make some concessions like not drinking as much or checking in with her when you go out drinking
it's funny how all these dummies point out telling her would ruin the relationship as if kissing the other chick wasn't what already ruined it. The reality is, even if she knows the truth or not, he still didn't think much enough of his girlfriend to just not do it in the first place. We're all going to pretend like oh, it happened in 1.5 seconds, I had no time to back TF away from her. Unless she literally fell on his lips, he sat there and let things build up until he got to where he is, wondering how not to screw up what he chose to risk in the first place. Let's be real, you don't need to be perfect or a genius or sober to not cheat.
(edited 5 years ago)
*reads it is from 7 years ago* reality just kicked in
Original post by EmpressAries
it's funny how all these dummies point out telling her would ruin the relationship as if kissing the other chick wasn't what already ruined it. The reality is, even if she knows the truth or not, he still didn't think much enough of his girlfriend to just not do it in the first place. We're all going to pretend like oh, it happened in 1.5 seconds, I had no time to back TF away from her. Unless she literally fell on his lips, he sat there and let things build up until he got to where he is, wondering how not to screw up what he chose to risk in the first place. Let's be real, you don't need to be perfect or a genius or sober to not cheat.

7 year too late, mate.

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