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asian guy and british girl, do we have future?

I have been seeing this guy and we get on extremely well most of the time.
We are into the same kind of stuff, we can talk for hours and I dont seem to get bored no matter how much time we spend together.

He is asian and I am white,, I don't see this as a problem as my family are quite liberal and they wouldn't mind what race/religion he is as long as he was a nice person. However his family are really strict and don't let him go out with girls, I think this is because of the race difference but he assured me they would react the same way if he was seeing an asian girl; that its not the race issue just they oppose him having a girl friend.

One of my friends (who is asian) told me I should be careful as there is little chance of us having a future together so I shouldn't get too involved. I thought this might be the case but then he started behaving in a way that suggested he might be serious about me.

He has told me that he loves me and wants to be with me forever and after we graduate we can move in together ect and he says his family will come round if he tells them gradually. Also he is quite possessive, he gets jelous if I hang out with guys,, objects to me drinking alchohol, going clubbing ect. I know this can be annoying but it could prove that he does care about me because if he was just looking for a fling he wouldn't really care what I did in my spare time.

Does anyone think we have got a future or should I take my friend's advice and not get too involved?

Does anyone know of a situation similar to this one which has had a happy ending?

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Reply 1
Lots cases of this have happy endings...Someone from my old school had a dad who was asian and mother was white. np
Reply 2
i would worry about the posessivness tbh, why should he dictate what you do in your spare time?
Reply 3
trigger
i would worry about the posessivness tbh, why should he dictate what you do in your spare time?


Yeah it can be a bit annoying but in return if I tell him not to do something he doesn't do it.
Reply 4
Asia is a mighty big place. Please specify.
Reply 5
^o) so you tell each other what to do?
Reply 6
derf
Asia is a mighty big place. Please specify.


He's Pakistani
Anonymous
he gets jelous if I hang out with guys,, objects to me drinking alchohol, going clubbing ect. I ?

So he's muslim then?
Yes there are happy endings, but I think if you two are serious about each other, then it is going to be a rough ride I'm afraid. It depends how strict his parents are too, I've heard so many stories like these, and Ive found that parents are less strict with their sons having white gfs, than if it was vice versa. I think his family would hate it at first, but eventually they would give in, if you are serious about him. Also this possessive thing, dont let him control you like that, tell him if he wants a girl that doesnt drink, go and get someone from his same race, dont let him change you.
If his dad comes at you with an axe, just run.

Worthy advice, that. And before anyone get's all pissy, it's not exactly unheard of.
Reply 9
The possessiveness and telling you what you can and can't do may seem as sweet and caring now but its only going to get worse IMO and you may not feel the same way when you just want a quiet drink with friends or to go out clubbing because you want to dance a little bit..

Also how old are you both? You dont know whats going to happen in the next few years and saying things like moving in together is a bit hasty considering you're not even officially seeing each other yet (from what I gather from the post).

I would be careful.
Reply 10
funny indeed, heed my advice and leg it before the guys parents first kill you, and then kill him :biggrin: dont take it personally but this ride is more scary than the pepsi max in the dark blindfolded. OR you could enjoy the ride, just b mates and say u dont wanna ove in with him( in other words, leg it )
Reply 11
mangomaz
The possessiveness and telling you what you can and can't do may seem as sweet and caring now but its only going to get worse IMO and you may not feel the same way when you just want a quiet drink with friends or to go out clubbing because you want to dance a little bit..

Also how old are you both? You dont know whats going to happen in the next few years and saying things like moving in together is a bit hasty considering you're not even officially seeing each other yet (from what I gather from the post).

I would be careful.


He is 19 and I am 18 (will b 19 soon). We have been seeing each other since September,, but I've only told my close friends as I wasn't sure if it was serious but it seems like its getting serious. At first I didnt think we would still being together by Christmas but I've grown to really care for him and it seems his intentions are more serious than I'd first assumed.
Reply 12
Anonymous
He is 19 and I am 18 (will b 19 soon). We have been seeing each other since September,, but I've only told my close friends as I wasn't sure if it was serious but it seems like its getting serious. At first I didnt think we would still being together by Christmas but I've grown to really care for him and it seems his intentions are more serious than I'd first assumed.

Well... I would be very very careful. It seems like hes decided you're the person for him which is very sweet but you havent been together that long and well I would be a bit scared if I was in your position!

I think you need to have a talk on your positions on a number of issues, for example his saying you cant go out clubbing or drink. How would you feel if you could never do any of these things again just because he told you you cant? If you feel ok about it then thats a good sign for the relationship but if you think a few years down the line it could get frustrating thats only going to reflect badly on your attitude towards the relationship. I cant say much obviously because I dont really know the situation at all!
Reply 13
if his parents are so strict they might not like the fact that hes going out with a white gal........
wat would u do if u had to convert or somethin???
Reply 14
had to convert ^o)
Reply 15
I know wot I'd do :mad:
Reply 16
trigger
had to convert ^o)


i dont mean u have to.....
coz the parents of that guy are strict and religious!!!
Reply 17
Couldn't you meet his parents, so they know ur not the stereotypical amoral, maneating 'goree'? :P
Reply 18
My Aunts a Christian, and my Uncles a Muslim, they've been together for about 17 years. They got married a couple of years back and they have 4 kids! There gorgeous! So cute but very very cheeky. My Aunt and Uncle haven't had any difficulties, my family accepted her and why shouldn't they have? Shes a great person, and she buys me nice presents! :biggrin:
you've got a future, the no drinking thing and clubbing are stuff are just his religious beliefs...you might have to talk about that if you don't that to become an issue.don't worry about what your mate said,and ok maybe you might not be able to go to his or vice versa (because his parents won't let him) just make the most of what you have,please do be careful though because sometimes these things can turn nasty,especially if his family see you and get really upset.have fun though and good luck :hugs: