First Love

hey
atm i'm in my first 'real' relationship. and i really really love him. and he loves me. i really feel that we could really last, maybe marriage and beyond. he's so different to any other guy i've met before, and doesn't do the whole laddish lets suck up to my friends thing.
does everyone in the first love relationship feel like it'll last forever? is this just naive to think that it will?

ps i know i should just enjoy it and stuff, but i can't help daydreaming!!
xxxx

Reply 1

Fleece

15

every time you fall in love you'll think the exact same things...
you really shouldnt be thinking about marriage and that you'll be together forever...because i can tell you from experience - if you split up, then you're not only grieving for that person, but for the future you thought you had. it makes everything 10 times harder.

Reply 2

Trigger

18

my first love stole my virginity and was an ass hole :mad:

Reply 3

-sophie-

11

I used to feel like that, we both did. We even talked about getting a place together and the right age to get married (25ish for us). I'm no longer with him, and with time memories and feelings change. I don't love him anymore, and a part of me thinks I was being naive to think I did. I certainly don't want any of those things anymore (with him), ever. I think I grew up a bit? I'm attracted to a completely different type of person.

But, I do know couples, (a man I know met his wife when he was 17) they are married, children and so so so so happy. Maybe I just wasn't in deep enough. It can happen, but it didn't for me. Though I think if I was still in my first love relationship I wouldn't be who I am today, and I think I'm better off for it. After all the first dress you see in a shop maybe nice but it may not be the prettiest of all the shops, the best fit or (in my case) the best quality material. What a strange metaphor!

You are right, enjoy things and at the end of the day if it's ment to be, then it will be, end of.

Best of luck XXX

Reply 4

FoodBuff

I did. But after a long while of struggling to maintain the relationship it finally turn out to be an abortive attempt. I mean not everyone could stick to such a high level of commitment. The thing you want only happens when you are with the right person at the right time.

Reply 5

Mrs_F

15

Things didn't last with my first love - I got over it and I met the man for me and we really are getting married - woohoo!

Reply 6

slk999

15

My first love was a bitch- quite literally, for 2 whole years she strung me along giving me false hopes about things all the time then in July just left without saying goodbye- I had to ask her to meet me so I could say bye cause other wise I wouldn't be able to let go. Only now, or before new year have I been able to sort things out and forget about her. Now I think about it, we weren't even serious- :frown:

, I convinced myself that it was good and it could work all the time- how wrong I was!

Reply 7

Lady_Muck

14

My first love? Well, still with him 3 years on.

I really do try soooooooooo hard not to get to 'into' it. But you do have these conversations and it doesn't help with him being 21 and saying that if we're still together on my 21st b'day (another 3 years!) he'll propose. It plants things in your head, I guess. I've never seen him regularly enough as he's always been away at school/uni so I'm anxious to see that if I did go to a uni near him, whether it could or would last!

Enjoy it for what it is, don't take it too seriously :smile:

Reply 8

Apricot Fairy

16

My first love and I split up after 18 months together. He was the first guy I'd ever even kissed and I was so sure we'd last that I used to worry about the fact that I'd never experienced what it was like to be with someone else, and wonder whether I'd get to 30 and then start wondering whether the grass was greener. I sometimes thought the best thing would be to split up at some point, see other people, remain friends, and then get back together once we both had more experience. When the break up came, I wasn't ready and ended up totally heartbroken for 6 months until I met someone else.

The thing is, we're now as good friends as we ever were, and there's still chemistry between us. Every time we see each other we end up kissing, and sometimes more, but it's not painful at all. (It is a year and a half since we split up though.) We're both off doing our own thing, and being young. And you know what? I could see us getting back together one day, if the circumstances were right. If we don't, we don't. Neither of us are heartbroken about the other, and we'll probably both meet different people and be guests at each other's weddings. But if we do get back together and stay together, it will be exactly what I dreamed of when I was 17.

Reply 9

Angelil

19

Still with my first love. We've been together just over a year and we've already talked about getting married.
However, we've agreed that it isn't going to happen yet because a) he doesn't yet have a job having finished his Masters and he wants to be financially secure before we marry; b) I'm still at uni; c) we don't want to have too long an engagement in case my parents get hold of it and make it into something bigger than we want; and d) it's going to be at least 2009 before we can get married anyway so there's plenty of time to get engaged.
There's no harm in discussing these things, just as long as you're both singing off the same song sheet.

Reply 10

~Sam~

15

Angelil

Still with my first love. We've been together just over a year and we've already talked about getting married.
However, we've agreed that it isn't going to happen yet because a) he doesn't yet have a job having finished his Masters and he wants to be financially secure before we marry; b) I'm still at uni; c) we don't want to have too long an engagement in case my parents get hold of it and make it into something bigger than we want; and d) it's going to be at least 2009 before we can get married anyway so there's plenty of time to get engaged.
There's no harm in discussing these things, just as long as you're both singing off the same song sheet.

Wow, you live in Maidenhead! :biggrin:

That's so near me

Reply 11

hippieglitter

19

I broke up with my first love a few months ago and no matter how i felt for him and how i feel for him now (sometimes i still think i love him) i know i would not be this happy if i had stayed with him. Things are great while they are going good, but more often than not they get to a point where they can't get any better and they crumble, its not often that a first love will last forever but you can at least hold on to the memories of the good times.

Reply 12

Katia

6

I'm still with mine - from the age of 14, 'til now. And we really do plan on marrying and having children, (when we're 25-ish). Okay you're all probably scoffing at the screen and looking at my age. But that's fine. I'm used to it now. He was/is my first, I'd loved him months before we got together. And we knew from day 1 that it was for real. And it is. And I'm not a naive sweet sixteen :love:

So to the thread starter - if that's how you feel then pay no heed to anyone elses opinions and concentrate on being happy and in love. Enjoy the feeling! Only you two know how you feel about one another and what it's like when you're alone etc.

Reply 13

pikaboo

13

"There's a reason why you never forget your first love. Your body has to get used to the simultaenous triple whammy which happens to your head, heart and groin."

Hmmmmm. Indeed. Cosmo is so insightful. :rolleyes:

There's no harm in daydreaming, it's just when you expect them to happen that things start getting dodgy...even if feelings don't change, then situations will, and it's best to be open to the flow when they do.

Reply 14

Angelil

19

~Sam~

Wow, you live in Maidenhead! :biggrin:

That's so near me

wow where are you from?

Reply 15

lil_lisa86

i finished with my first love a few weeks ago. it had always been a long distance relationship and then i ended up at the same uni as him (it was the best for my course) and thinks went sour. he began to act jealous and stopped trusting me. he told me yesterday that he is deleting me out of his life, and is going to pretend i dont exist. im quite hurt by this because he told me he was heart broken that i finished with him (i just needed some space). we were together for nearly 3 years, and i dont understand how he can just pretend i no longer exist!

Reply 16

Hayley_2k4

12

I'm still with mine (two years on) we've talked about getting married and having kids. although I'm not really thinking about it too much. Alot can change in 3 years :redface:

so we'll see

Reply 17

Little Girl Red

1

I'm still with my first love, coming up to two years now and we are planning to get married :biggrin:

It's just all so perfect, he's nowhere near my first boyfriend but most definitely my first love. And hopefully my last!

Reply 18

beanie

1

My first serious relationship ended up in a dead end and a bit of a mess. I was devestated, so was he but it wasn't meant to be and now we are good friends. At the time (end of year 11) I didn't think I'd ever feel that way about anyone again.. ha, I was naive.. Then I started college and met my boyfriend, its almost 18 months now and its like we have swapped legs, neither of us could walk without the other one. I think now, I'd say my current boyfriend is my first true love as I can honestly see myself marrying him, which I couldn't with my ex, so maybe we weren't as in love as I thought.

Reply 19

El Scotto

15

fairycakes

hey
atm i'm in my first 'real' relationship. and i really really love him. and he loves me. i really feel that we could really last, maybe marriage and beyond. he's so different to any other guy i've met before, and doesn't do the whole laddish lets suck up to my friends thing.
does everyone in the first love relationship feel like it'll last forever? is this just naive to think that it will?

ps i know i should just enjoy it and stuff, but i can't help daydreaming!!
xxxx

Thats what all first loves feel like isnt it...

However you feel now, Whatever you do, Dont neglect your friends to spend all the time with him, as 'if' you break up you'll need them there.

First Love

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