The Student Room Group

What's wrong with me?! :(

I know this sounds lame, but do you find it weird that I'm 17, and have never had a boyfriend, never even kissed anyone before? It's never really bothered me before, but when I moved schools this year to a boys school, I noticed how most of the guys had girlfriends, even really (and this sounds terrible) not very attractive guys! I mean, they're lovely people and of course it's personality over looks...but even so, I'm a nice person (I think) and I'm no great beauty by any means, but I'm not bad looking...I've got loads of guy mates as friends, some whom I'm really close with, and that's fine with me - I'm happy as I am, but I'm just wondering if it's at all odd that I haven't had a boyfriend before! :confused:

Sorry this is a really rambling post :redface:

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it's not odd at all! it shows you have standards for a start, so if you're happy then there's no problem. It only becomes a problem when you start thinking of it as one.
lil_sweetie
I know this sounds lame, but do you find it weird that I'm 17, and have never had a boyfriend, never even kissed anyone before? It's never really bothered me before, but when I moved schools this year to a boys school, I noticed how most of the guys had girlfriends, even really (and this sounds terrible) not very attractive guys! I mean, they're lovely people and of course it's personality over looks...but even so, I'm a nice person (I think) and I'm no great beauty by any means, but I'm not bad looking...I've got loads of guy mates as friends, some whom I'm really close with, and that's fine with me - I'm happy as I am, but I'm just wondering if it's at all odd that I haven't had a boyfriend before! :confused:

Sorry this is a really rambling post :redface:


It's not that unusual - I know a few 20 year olds who haven't had girlfriends/kissed a girl, so I don't think it's that big a deal. If you're contented with who you are and not looking for a boyfriend simply for the sake of having a boyfriend, then you'll be fine. You'll meet the right buy for you at some point , so don't fret about it - you're still only young. :smile:
Reply 3
lil_sweetie
I know this sounds lame, but do you find it weird that I'm 17,

Very weird. How can you be 17?
and have never had a boyfriend,

never? Well the world hasn't ended ...
never even kissed anyone before?

You've got lips? :eek:
It's never really bothered me before, but when I moved schools this year to a boys school, I noticed how most of the guys had girlfriends, even really (and this sounds terrible) not very attractive guys! I mean, they're lovely people and of course it's personality over looks...but even so,
I'm a nice person (I think) and I'm no great beauty by any means, but I'm not bad looking...

Your problems lie here.
I've got loads of guy mates as friends, some whom I'm really close with, and that's fine with me - I'm happy as I am, but I'm just wondering if it's at all odd that I haven't had a boyfriend before! :confused:

It is not odd. It means you are special.

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Sithius
20 YEARS OLD!? **** they must be ugly lol.

3 years later, you'll also join them. :d
Reply 4
I don't want to sound like I'm saying 'yeah but at least you haven't been through the **** I've been through', but part of me would give my right arm to be in a position where I had never done anything at all. In the past, because I was keen to get involved in certain guys and do certain things, I've ended up getting emotionally and physically hurt. Though I'm only 17, I feel like I've been dragged through a mile long thorn bush. So I don't think you're weird at all. I think you're sensible, decent and have your head screwed on and your priorities in the right place. There's plenty of time for boyfriends, for sex, for all the things it feels like everyone is doing, but you need to go through it at your own pace.
Reply 5
Dekota

3 years later, you'll also join them. :d


Did I say I aint had sex?
Reply 6
Sithius
Did I say I aint had sex?

Must have been with an animal I presume...
I didn't have a proper boyfriend till I was late 17. It's cos' I was too picky (which I was actually unaware of) & was unaware of people I wasn't interested in liking me (if that makes any sense!!). It took until someone liking me who I was interested in to make me realise that there wasn't anything wrong with me.
Reply 8
Sithius
~Refrains from calling your mother an animal~

~Refrains from saying son of a bitch, implying your mother being the bitch and you the bastard.
Reply 9
icedsilhouette
it's not odd at all! it shows you have standards for a start, so if you're happy then there's no problem. It only becomes a problem when you start thinking of it as one.

Agreed :biggrin:
Dont see it as a problem just because you are seeing alot of other people doing it, like you say it wasnt a problem before so it shouldn't be now should it??
Reply 10
There's nothing wrong with you. I was in the same position until I was almost 18 when I got together with my ex boyfriend and I have friends who are 18,19&20 who are still waiting. The right person will come along, be patient.
Reply 11
Having guys as friends is a lot better than having numerous boyfriends in my opinion...just wait until it happens, don't even bother worrying about it!
Reply 12
Sometimes I feel exactly like that. However, as I'm 20 (nearly 21), it's probably worse than for you. In fact sometimes it's agonising - if I'm in a sensitive mood, it hurts just to see a couple kissing... :frown: :bawling:

I really hoped to meet a special someone at university, but now I'm nearly halfway through my third year it doesn't seem too likely. :frown:
Reply 13
lil_sweetie
I know this sounds lame, but do you find it weird that I'm 17, and have never had a boyfriend, never even kissed anyone before? It's never really bothered me before, but when I moved schools this year to a boys school, I noticed how most of the guys had girlfriends, even really (and this sounds terrible) not very attractive guys! I mean, they're lovely people and of course it's personality over looks...but even so, I'm a nice person (I think) and I'm no great beauty by any means, but I'm not bad looking...I've got loads of guy mates as friends, some whom I'm really close with, and that's fine with me - I'm happy as I am, but I'm just wondering if it's at all odd that I haven't had a boyfriend before! :confused:

Sorry this is a really rambling post :redface:


Hey I'm 18 and at university, and I've never been kissed/asked out/etc.

It's not a big deal, there are quite a few people like you... I could name quite few from my school in Aus, at least, and a few from Uni as well...
Reply 14
I hadn't had a boyfriend until I was 17, at which point I went to an all-boys school, (noticing some coincidences here?) at which point I found someone who was interested in me and who I was attracted to. It lasted 3 weeks, but it was good to know it was possible.
Not suggesting you do the same, it's probably better if you don't need to, but there are people out there. (By the time I was 18, I was in a relationship that lasted a year...)
Reply 15
"Until you love yourself, noone can love you" - never a more true thing said.
Reply 16
Not odd at all. There isn't a set age at which you 'should have had a bf/been kissed' by.

I'm 18 and havn't had a boyfriend, and my first kiss was at 17. You're definately not the only one.
I got my first boyfriend/ had sex for the first time when I was 15, and I sure wish I had waited. I respect you. Most girls give in to peer pressure and lose their knickers before they are truly ready. There is no "right time", and if anyone has a problem with your virginity (not that anyone needs to know), they they're probably jelous :smile:
Reply 18
I'm 19 and I've never had a proper girlfriend :smile: .
Reply 19
I'm 17, very nearly 18, female, and I've never had a boyfriend either. I've kissed people but even those were just drunken snogs in clubs and stuff. No one's ever even asked me out! I sometimes get the feeling that I'm going to end up some sad old spinster. All my friends have had boyfriends, it really gets me down sometimes, I'd really like someone to be there and kiss & hug me, and care for me. I'm not unnattractive (though I'm a little overweight), most of my friends are girls although I do have a few friends who are boys, I'm told I have a really nice friendly personality, and I've never known anyone fancy me.


The point of my post is to let the OP know that you're not alone, and you WILL find someone. I hope I do!