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Tips On What To Say To Him..
Ok, I'd like to alert you to the fact that this will seem childish.
Ok, I'm at Uni, and my problem concerns a guy. There's a guy at Uni whom I knew prior to starting there. Known him for almost two years now. We fell out a year ago, and it wasnt 'til we bumped into each other that we put our differences aside. We'd been getting on really well before this, been on dates etc.
So, we get on really well during term-time at uni. Constantly texting, going to same bars and clubs etc with our separate groups of friends etc. However, we get home and he's completely cold and distant. me up with him at a club 2 days after we broke up. I was with my friends, he with his. We get on okay, but I get the impression somethings bugging him. I bought him a little present for xmas, nothing huge. He was working in his dads bar, so i popped it in to him on xmas eve. He text me back thanking me, saying that it was really sweet, but he was really embarrased cos he hadnt got me anything. Cant see why he was so shocked that I'd got him something. Anyways, we meet the week later in the same club. He ets pissed off cos I was talkin to a guy (a friend, who happens to be gay anyway!) and, although rather drunk, didnt seem to mind making it obvios that he was mildly jealous.
Anyway, to cut a long story short, I text him new years day. Wished him happy n-y and merely asked if he'd had a good night and how e'd spent the evening. He still hasnt replied!
Now I'm only asking advice because I'm genuinely astonished that this has happened, when we were getting on so well. I mean, he'd always initiate texting etc last term, I'm not deluding myself.
Thre's a start-of-term ball on feb 1st. I know he's going because we all bought the tickets in a bi group. We havent exactly fallen out, but I simply dont get why he's done this. Therefore, what do I say when I next see him? And Should I even mention it? We're gonna come into contact for sure, as our groups mix/socialise together.
Ok, I'm at Uni, and my problem concerns a guy. There's a guy at Uni whom I knew prior to starting there. Known him for almost two years now. We fell out a year ago, and it wasnt 'til we bumped into each other that we put our differences aside. We'd been getting on really well before this, been on dates etc.
So, we get on really well during term-time at uni. Constantly texting, going to same bars and clubs etc with our separate groups of friends etc. However, we get home and he's completely cold and distant. me up with him at a club 2 days after we broke up. I was with my friends, he with his. We get on okay, but I get the impression somethings bugging him. I bought him a little present for xmas, nothing huge. He was working in his dads bar, so i popped it in to him on xmas eve. He text me back thanking me, saying that it was really sweet, but he was really embarrased cos he hadnt got me anything. Cant see why he was so shocked that I'd got him something. Anyways, we meet the week later in the same club. He ets pissed off cos I was talkin to a guy (a friend, who happens to be gay anyway!) and, although rather drunk, didnt seem to mind making it obvios that he was mildly jealous.
Anyway, to cut a long story short, I text him new years day. Wished him happy n-y and merely asked if he'd had a good night and how e'd spent the evening. He still hasnt replied!
Now I'm only asking advice because I'm genuinely astonished that this has happened, when we were getting on so well. I mean, he'd always initiate texting etc last term, I'm not deluding myself.
Thre's a start-of-term ball on feb 1st. I know he's going because we all bought the tickets in a bi group. We havent exactly fallen out, but I simply dont get why he's done this. Therefore, what do I say when I next see him? And Should I even mention it? We're gonna come into contact for sure, as our groups mix/socialise together.
Hopefully.. he was just too embarassed about his behaviour 
fragreaper
Hopefully.. he was just too embarassed about his behaviour
thanks for your reply. What do you think he's embarrassed about? I'm interested in other peoples take on this! x
Surely you're within your rights to ask him why he didnt reply. Ask him if you've offended him. You obviously haven't but he'l feel obliged to say you haven't.
Anonymous
thanks for your reply. What do you think he's embarrassed about? I'm interested in other peoples take on this! x
About getting drunk an acting obviously jealous when he had no right to.
If he's not much of a man he might find ignoring you easier than apoligising....
fragreaper
About getting drunk an acting obviously jealous when he had no right to.
If he's not much of a man he might find ignoring you easier than apoligising....
If he's not much of a man he might find ignoring you easier than apoligising....
Sorry to split hairs here, but I doubt very much that it's down to the jealousy. He's done it before while we're at Uni!
Anonymous
Sorry to split hairs here, but I doubt very much that it's down to the jealousy. He's done it before while we're at Uni!
Fair enough then
He might just be an arse....(why do women often have trouble recognising this?)
fragreaper
Fair enough then He might just be an arse....
(why do women often have trouble recognising this?)
He might just be an arse....(why do women often have trouble recognising this?)
Cos he acts completely on the contrary usually! THe fact that his is a one-off incident that he hasnt replied to my text concerns me!
Anonymous
Cos he acts completely on the contrary usually! THe fact that his is a one-off incident that he hasnt replied to my text concerns me!
Hmm, well if it is out of character, you should tactfully ask him
1) If he's ok
2) ask cutely if you've offended him in some way
3) let him know you're there to talk if he wants
and if still no response
4)why didnt you text me back? you had me worried...
fragreaper
Hmm, well if it is out of character, you should tactfully ask him
1) If he's ok
2) ask cutely if you've offended him in some way
3) let him know you're there to talk if he wants
and if still no response
4)why didnt you text me back? you had me worried...
1) If he's ok
2) ask cutely if you've offended him in some way
3) let him know you're there to talk if he wants
and if still no response
4)why didnt you text me back? you had me worried...
Those are both really constructive, sensible posts. Thanks to you both! Well (and this is perhaps why i chose to remain anon!) I'm concerned about the xmas present and wonder if it my have put him off?! Dont get me wrong it wasnt exactly a ferrari, buut still!
But dont think i'd be likey to text/call before I see him, as I cant see what would have prevented him from getting in touch. Surely he's had a minute to spare in the last 12 days!
Anonymous
Those are both really constructive, sensible posts. Thanks to you both! Well (and this is perhaps why i chose to remain anon!) I'm concerned about the xmas present and wonder if it my have put him off?! Dont get me wrong it wasnt exactly a ferrari, buut still!
But dont think i'd be likey to text/call before I see him, as I cant see what would have prevented him from getting in touch. Surely he's had a minute to spare in the last 12 days!
But dont think i'd be likey to text/call before I see him, as I cant see what would have prevented him from getting in touch. Surely he's had a minute to spare in the last 12 days!
You're welcome
(rep always appreciated hint hint 
) 
Thats very logical reasoning at the end... but people in general are fantastic procrastinators! Pick up the phone, ring him, be casual and passive, he wont get mad.... and you can stop worrying!
i am wanting to go for the route that he is just a arse. Girls normally say he is not normally like this but then guys have a thing about putting on a front for when the girl is around.
However perhaps he didnt get the text or has changed phones and for some innocent reason hasnt told you or perhaps i dont know something else
I would text if i were you. Doesnt have to be about anything you worried about just randomly about something to see if he is still conversing with you. If he doesnt replied then get pissed off and bitch to your friends and then forget him like the first time
However perhaps he didnt get the text or has changed phones and for some innocent reason hasnt told you or perhaps i dont know something else
I would text if i were you. Doesnt have to be about anything you worried about just randomly about something to see if he is still conversing with you. If he doesnt replied then get pissed off and bitch to your friends and then forget him like the first time
I would text if i were you. Doesnt have to be about anything you worried about just randomly about something to see if he is still conversing with you. If he doesnt replied then get pissed off and bitch to your friends and then forget him like the first time
Yeah, but my point, and this is probably what i'm so vexed about, but why would he go to all the hassle of being interested wile at Uni, only to completely ignore me at home, when no-one else is around. It's just that I dont get the impression that he's doing it to look 'good' in front of his friends, so to speak.
May I add that, at the beginning of Dec', we had a minor diagreement in a club. (I told him off, but let it drop 10mins later, considering it happened at 1am!). I was replying to a text in the club. When I'd finished, I kept the phone in my gand, while I waited for my friends response. He pinched the phone from my hand, held it above his head, as if to look through my messages! He's 6ft 4in so i'm not able to jump that high! He did it in a jokey way but i'm sure he'd have looked. Mind you, he's done this on two other occasions, both when we've been drunk.
Later in the night, I mentioned it to his closest friend, and he laughed and said that ''he's only testing you'' and blamed the fact that he went to boarding school as an excuse for not knowing what offends a girl! The ''testing you'' comment left me a little surprised, and I didnt think to ask him what he meant at the time- wish I had now!
Yeah, but my point, and this is probably what i'm so vexed about, but why would he go to all the hassle of being interested wile at Uni, only to completely ignore me at home, when no-one else is around. It's just that I dont get the impression that he's doing it to look 'good' in front of his friends, so to speak.
May I add that, at the beginning of Dec', we had a minor diagreement in a club. (I told him off, but let it drop 10mins later, considering it happened at 1am!). I was replying to a text in the club. When I'd finished, I kept the phone in my gand, while I waited for my friends response. He pinched the phone from my hand, held it above his head, as if to look through my messages! He's 6ft 4in so i'm not able to jump that high! He did it in a jokey way but i'm sure he'd have looked. Mind you, he's done this on two other occasions, both when we've been drunk.
Later in the night, I mentioned it to his closest friend, and he laughed and said that ''he's only testing you'' and blamed the fact that he went to boarding school as an excuse for not knowing what offends a girl! The ''testing you'' comment left me a little surprised, and I didnt think to ask him what he meant at the time- wish I had now!
Why would he look at your messges if he wasnt bothered?! Dont text him again, he'll think he's got you right where he wants you if you text him again, seeing as he didnt have the maners to reply to your last message.
Just a thought but the fact that you made up after falling out for so long suggests that you're both into each other, or you'd have found someone better in the meantime.
He thinks that you like him. he's right, I mean you're writing about him on the bloody internet. He thinks that by not textin back, he looks busy and in demand, and it'll make him look good.
Just be nice to him when you see him and he'll regret not textin back. What are the guys take on this?! I've come to the conclusion that this is what you all do. It's happened to me twice.
Just a thought but the fact that you made up after falling out for so long suggests that you're both into each other, or you'd have found someone better in the meantime.
He thinks that you like him. he's right, I mean you're writing about him on the bloody internet. He thinks that by not textin back, he looks busy and in demand, and it'll make him look good.
Just be nice to him when you see him and he'll regret not textin back. What are the guys take on this?! I've come to the conclusion that this is what you all do. It's happened to me twice.
NO!
well tbh i dont know but i do know i and everyone i know has never done that or indeed has the forethought and planning for such a plan. I said that you could make a random text about say some band or something to avoid looking completely desperate.
Personally i still think he is just an arse. Perhaps at uni he felt lonely or something and went to you for comfort
well tbh i dont know but i do know i and everyone i know has never done that or indeed has the forethought and planning for such a plan. I said that you could make a random text about say some band or something to avoid looking completely desperate.
Personally i still think he is just an arse. Perhaps at uni he felt lonely or something and went to you for comfort
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