Starting a Relationship Now, Going to Uni Next Week

One of my really close friends and I have been VERY flirtatious recently, we haven't kissed but always hold hands and cuddle etc. I really want a relationship with this guy but we both go to uni next week and we'll be about 2 hours apart. As we haven't kissed or anything I don't want to suggest a relationship in case he's just being very flirtatious and nothing more, but I don't want to lose him :frown:

I'm only going to be able to see him once more before we leave and I'm so scared that we'll just forget about 'us' and he'll move on to somebody else at uni. I've never been in a relationship before whilst he's just come out of a 6 month relationship and so is far more experienced than me (he's not a virgin, I've never been kissed). Has anyone any advice on what to do?

Reply 1

little_wizard123

If you're worried about it not happening once you've gone to Uni, you have to go for it now. You'll regret it otherwise.

Reply 2

elixira

Oh god no, don't tie yourself down to a long-distance relationship when you're beginning one of the most exciting parts of your life...

Reply 3

imperial maniac

Original post by elixira

Oh god no, don't tie yourself down to a long-distance relationship when you're beginning one of the most exciting parts of your life...

What she said.

Reply 4

theaustriangirl

I'd be a bit cautious if he's just come out of a relationship... Maybe he wants to enjoy himself right now and is not up for something serious? Even more so when uni-life with all the excitement is waiting for him..
I personally wouldn't get into some kind of relationship just before the start of uni... You will get to know lots of new people, you'll have so much to do during the first few weeks... You are not going to think about him too often I guess...

Reply 5

ScarlettDangerfield

I would honestly question whether a relationship would be able to grow in a healthy way in those circumstances- not only will you be fairly long-distance but you will be meeting a large number of new people very soon and even if you don't realise it, you will probably find yourself changed as a person even after a short time at uni. Long-distance is doable for relationships that already have a solid grounding but I think in your case you would run the risk of your relationship taking a very long time to get past the formative stages.

If you've never had a relationship before you're probably keen to make the most of this opportunity, but you have to bear in mind the frustration and heartache it might cause you to fight against the odds to try to create a relationship out of this. If you find yourself still thinking about him in a few months' time, maybe re-evaluate the possibility of being with this guy around Christmas time if he's still willing too.

For the moment I'd say just try and make a mental break from him and focus on going to uni next week. I know it's hard but you will almost certainly make life easier and more enjoyable in the long run. Good luck :smile:

Reply 6

Studentus-anonymous

Original post by Anonymous

That's why he is flirting, because anything that happens will be a fling.

You're female and going to uni, you'll meet plenty of guys who are like and or better than said flirty friend.

Enjoy it while it's fun but yeah relationship isn't going to happen.

Reply 7

username163729

Well me and my girlfriend did it, no reason why you wouldn't be able to either...

If you both mutually agree to it, then you should at least follow through and see how it goes before ending it.

Reply 8

appletizer

I did this, against my better judgement, and it's been nearly 5 years now - we're still together and happy.

Don't necessarily write it off if it's what you think you want. Circumstances can be overcome.

Reply 9

enchanting

I started a relationship a month before starting University - changed my University too! Two years later we are now engaged, living together and I'm enjoying my life to the fullest. University is fun sure, but don't throw away something that could potentially last for life for something that lasts for three years :smile: