Are my ideas totally unrealistic?

Do boys exist who are gentlemanly and romantic or am i just waiting for something which will never come? Do they just exist in films!?
I've never had a boyfriend or anything and don't have any friends who are boys simply because from what i can tell of the boys who are with people my age, they simply have no actual attachment to the girls, no depth of feeling, no respect, no interests apart from getting drunk and are only after one thing. I'm not condemning people who are in these relationships, it's just basically something which isn't for me. Since i've never been to a mixed school and am going off to a London university (not sure which)in September it will obviously be a fairly big change being in contact with more boys, and so I was wondering do such boys exist or not? I spoke about this to some people in my year and they said that any boys which do fit the gentlemanly and romantic description are those who and i quote 'have no hope in hell with getting with anyone anyway because of how ugly there are and so have to behave like that to attract even the smallest amount of attention.' This type of comment reflects why I consider a lot of people in my year as idiots but anyway...Obviously looks aren't everything in a relationship but in my opinion there has to be some sort of physical attraction for someone to change from friend to boyfriend.

Anyways thanks for any light anyone can shed on this matter, it's not majorly bothering me, it's not like i'm desperate for male companionship but it would be nice to know if the option is realistic or not to meet someone like that.

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Reply 1

supercat

Romantic and lovely guys DO exist. There are just a lot of idiots you have to wade through first. I was friends with my current boyfriend for a year before we started going out, and we've been together for almost three years now. It might help to just hang out with some guys for a while to get used to their weird ways :wink:

but don't worry too much about it. If someone gentlemanly & romantic comes along, think about it then. Think about other things and before you know it someone lovely will appear!

Reply 2

Carreh

different?

Do boys exist who are gentlemanly and romantic or am i just waiting for something which will never come?

They do exist, but sometimes they are well hidden!

Reply 3

34253

These guys do exist, but you have to push them in the right direction, make them earn their crust as it were. By romantic you mean like buying flowers and stuff like that?

Reply 4

Manatee

Don't worry, nice boys definitely do exist - and they aren't nice simply to compensate for a lack of looks either.

:smile:

Reply 5

~Sam~

different?

Do boys exist who are gentlemanly and romantic or am i just waiting for something which will never come?

I've found one :love:

Reply 6

Eien

Anyways thanks for any light anyone can shed on this matter, it's not majorly bothering me, it's not like i'm desperate for male companionship but it would be nice to know if the option is realistic or not to meet someone like that.

Of course there is - would all guys just be superficial idiots? Look in different places to where you do already for guys who are more respectful, romantic and mature. The same applies to girls as well, the majority of girls I used to see around me are totally unattractive to me because they are superficial, immature and impossible to have a decent conversation with, but of course I am now meeting girls who are totally different. It's pretty naive to think that people like that don't exist.

Reply 7

Angelil

I assume you mean the kind of bloke who buys little things for you 'just because', and treats you as if you're the most special person in the world.
They are out there! I've found one of them! (Mine opens doors for me and suchlike too, but that isn't everyone's thing.) As someone's already said, you might have to kiss a few frogs before you find your prince, but it will happen.

Reply 8

The Albatross

when you get to uni i'm sure you'll meet a totally different class of guys!

I went to an all girls school too, and wondered how i'd react to male company. turned out very well for me as a most wonderful sincere, caring, awesome guy just happened to live opposite me in halls. We've been going out for nearly a year an a half now.
It is realistic to hope to meet someone,as there are plenty of nice guys out there. it has been said already, but definitely try to make friends first, and really get to know them!

Reply 9

Monkey_Maiden

There are blokes who are uber lovely and romantic but I've only met one :frown:

and now he's gone.

Reply 10

Poica

Yes, but bear in mind no man will behave like any men in a rom-com. In fact, most men would be sick at the idea.

Reply 11

davestones

Unfortunately we do exist :p:

just well hidden and not loud and outspoken like the other types :wink:

I don't think I am ugly either... you tell me, pic in profile. You just have to look harder to find us :smile:

Reply 12

beecher

Angelil

Mine opens doors for me and suchlike too, but that isn't everyone's thing.

I thought most people did that :eek:

. It's a common courtesy!

Reply 13

hippychick4eva

they do exist :love:

ive got one... the best thing to do is not to intentionally look for one... they tend to just arrive when you least expect it.. and dont rule anyone out with first immpressions

Reply 14

kb500

Poica

Yes, but bear in mind no man will behave like any men in a rom-com. In fact, most men would be sick at the idea.

No, the guys who behave like that as in overly romantic and doing the whole you every wish is my command thing will not get any female company...

Reply 15

Ceri327

they definately do exist i found one too!! and he's sooooo fit too so its not jus a looks thing, and i cant get him out of my head. but he went away, didnt like me lol

Reply 16

HighlyEvolved

different?

I spoke about this to some people in my year and they said that any boys which do fit the gentlemanly and romantic description are those who and i quote 'have no hope in hell with getting with anyone anyway because of how ugly there are and so have to behave like that to attract even the smallest amount of attention.' This type of comment reflects why I consider a lot of people in my year as idiots

I agree, they are idiots. So if your just a generally nice guy who doesn't go out on a night with the intension to sleep with a lass then your ugly. I suggest you come "up north" (if you arent already), most people up here are nice, in my opinion anyway.

The reason there are less real gentlemen nowadays is because there are less real ladies.

Reply 17

LubyLoo

I think you find a lot of guys are idiots when you meet them, but if they really like a girl, they will ditch the idiot image, and their romantic personality will appear. Well I hope so anyway. :smile:

--------------

edmj000

The reason there are less real gentlemen nowadays is because there are less real ladies.

I actually have to agree with that.

Reply 18

~the_one~

I know the most amazing guy, you see him and you think OMFG! He is so attractive, and seriously looks like a model. Then you think he must be arrogant because of his looks. But getting to know him you find that hes actually a real geek, whos really shy and totally a gentelman. Before i even started speaking to him, he just came and sat next to me and bought me a coffee, cos he was so shy.

Anyway i'll stop bragging now, there are good nice guys everywhere, and attractive ones too.