done something stupid thats ended with me getting hurt :-(

Im sorry for this rant, but I really need to let it all out somewhere...its not really a rant actually, more me needing to get my feelings out.
About 8 months ago I started noticing a guy who works near me, then about 2 months after that I plucked up the courage to ask for his number which he gave me. A few days later he then called me and asked if I wanted to meet up, which we did and he told me that he was married and had a kid. I was really shocked and said to myself then that nothing could happen. However, that same day we were walking and he took my hand, gave me a hug and then we started kissing. I knew what I was doing was stupid, but however much my head said no my heart said yes. We'd talk nearly everyday and Id see him about 4 times a week....he then told me that he loved me, however I didnt say it back, as I was shocked that he'd said it, however one day I realised that I did love him and so told him. Anyway, a few days ago he started being really off with me, and then yesterday I saw him and he said that he thought we should end it, which I was devestated about. He had a hell of a lot to lose, as divorce would mean losing a huge extended family etc. I think I knew deep down that it wouldnt have worked, but I feel so crap now, and I know its my own fault that I let myself get involved, and that it was going to end with me getting hurt. The thing that makes it 100 times worse in my opinion is that he said to me last night on the phone that he still feels the same way about me, and he said to me that he still loves me and I love him too I want to still be friends with him and be able to talk to him. I cant just turn my feelings off and not see him, as he's been such a big part of my life, seeing him loads etc. He said that I need to use my head and think normally and not use my heart. I really feel so crap now, and I have a maths exam to do this morning Im sorry about writing all of this, but I cant tell my friends this. They know that I know him, but they think we're best friends, nothing more nothing less, so I cant exactly go crying to them....we've said to each other that we're going to leave it for a few days then have another chat etc....anyway....
x

What is there to "chat" about?

You made a bad decision (we all do!) and you were taken in by him - he has now told you he's not going to leave his wife and you know that's never going to change, so as much as it hurts it's best to break all ties with him and try to move on.

Don't beat yourself up, you had feelings for him and exercised poor judgement. The only thing you should feel bad about is if you continue even communicating with him - he is someone else's husband and even if he is the worst husband in the world that is no excuse for you to facilitate his behaviour.

Tell him it's over and focus on more important things. It will be hard but it's for the best. Good luck with the exam!