The Student Room Group

Should you call guys back??

If a guy calls you, but doesn't reach you and leaves a message saying "I'll call again tomorrow", then he calls tomorrow, but doesn't reach you again and then says "I'll try you again later"....should the girl just try calling him back? Or should the girl just wait until he calls again? I never know what to do when a guy calls but I miss the call. One of my friends said after not answering two times that the guy would think i was blowing him off if I didn't call back....but what if he doesn't specifically say "call me back??"

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Reply 1
call him back dammit!!
guys just say that.... call him back say sorry for missing your call twice! whats up!? do it now!!
Yer i'd call him back, after two attempts on different days with no response I would be close to giving up.
Reply 3
Wahoowa
If a guy calls you, but doesn't reach you and leaves a message saying "I'll call again tomorrow", then he calls tomorrow, but doesn't reach you again and then says "I'll try you again later"....should the girl just try calling him back? Or should the girl just wait until he calls again? I never know what to do when a guy calls but I miss the call. One of my friends said after not answering two times that the guy would think i was blowing him off if I didn't call back....but what if he doesn't specifically say "call me back??"

Just send a message or something saying "Sorry i not answered your call, i just been busy, call me back at around"
Then give him a certain time to call you back.
I always think its nice to call guys back - they seem to appreciate it and i think they are just being polite rather than saying "will you call me back" - i think they hope we do though! and i guess its only fair! xx
Reply 5
ARgh, I think I messed up...I get the sense he thinks now that I am playing games because he doesn't call as much now. But I called him a few times on new year's eve, and I was worried he'd think I was calling too much! (I was pissed, otherwise I wouldn't have called so repeatedly!) So guys would expect you to call back even if they say "I'll call you later" when they don't catch you? I guess after two calls yep, I should have called back....I never answered the phone because my phone was broken, and I couldn't here it ring...which I forgot to tell him (I meant to! I just kept forgetting to mention it). I guess I figured if he wanted me to call back he'd say "call me back", but guess I'm wrong? darnit
Wahoowa
If a guy calls you, but doesn't reach you and leaves a message saying "I'll call again tomorrow", then he calls tomorrow, but doesn't reach you again and then says "I'll try you again later"....should the girl just try calling him back? Or should the girl just wait until he calls again? I never know what to do when a guy calls but I miss the call. One of my friends said after not answering two times that the guy would think i was blowing him off if I didn't call back....but what if he doesn't specifically say "call me back??"


FFS, just call him back damnit! It's only polite - he's spent a few attempts trying to reach you, but you've been busy, so it's polite that you call him back as opposed to letting him chase you. If I did that with a girl, then I'd get pretty frustrated if she didn't call me back after trying to call her a few times.
Reply 7
:rolleyes: just call him back. Oh gosh, the phone is ringing! Should I pick it up? *rushes to TSR and creates poll*
Reply 8
Bdarnell
:rolleyes: just call him back. Oh gosh, the phone is ringing! Should I pick it up? *rushes to TSR and creates poll*


Hey, where are you in California?

EDIT: whoa, sorry for the hijacking that just took place
Reply 9
Wahoowa
If a guy calls you, but doesn't reach you and leaves a message saying "I'll call again tomorrow", then he calls tomorrow, but doesn't reach you again and then says "I'll try you again later"....should the girl just try calling him back? Or should the girl just wait until he calls again? I never know what to do when a guy calls but I miss the call. One of my friends said after not answering two times that the guy would think i was blowing him off if I didn't call back....but what if he doesn't specifically say "call me back??"



you should definitly ring back if your interested. Its only polite.
also, theres a thing called the 3 phone call rule.

You ring once, if you dont get through you may ring again.

After that, the onus is on her to ring you....

If you ring a third time, shes definitly got to contact you first.
Reply 10
ring him!!!!!

even if you just miss his call by 5 minutes there is know harm in ringing him
Reply 11
What's the matter with you? If you miss two calls and you want to talk to him, call him, obviously.
Reply 12
I suspect the original poster may be American...they do have a different style of dating to us, it's far more formal and based on the premise that the guy does all the chasing...
Personally I'd call the guy back, but it's up to you. Depends how much you like him I suppose...
Reply 13
Poica
I suspect the original poster may be American...they do have a different style of dating to us, it's far more formal and based on the premise that the guy does all the chasing...
Personally I'd call the guy back, but it's up to you. Depends how much you like him I suppose...



Yep, I'm American...and it's true, the guys in the US do the calling. As soon as the girl starts calling him (not for all guys, but pretty much in general), she's considered too needy, clingy, etc. It's stupid, I agree, but it's just common knowledge there to let the guy call you.

Okay, so I DO sound 12. But I did call him by the way, after the third phone call (where he didn't leave a message). When I spoke with him he asked if I got his message, and I just said "um, yes", and there was kind of a silence...prob as in him thinking "okay, why didn't you call back?!?"

So what if I initiate my own call to him now, would that be too forward? If, say, I just call him to say hi, for no reason. He hasn't called since I last talked to him in returning his call...before that he was calling all the time, nearly every day, and had asked me out again, but since then he hasn't called and we haven't gone out.
Reply 14
the whole of americia just went down in my estimation. I dont get this at all if someone leaves a message why the hell wouldnt you call them back. Are girls in americia so simple that they cant do anything unless told exactly what to do ie call me. If so women get out of there now! Come to scotland its much better :wink:
Reply 15
Wahoowa you really are thinking about all this too much. There are no "rules" here. You want to talk to someone, you call them. You want to go out somewhere with someone, you ask them. It doesn't matter what sex you are.
Wahoowa
If a guy calls you, but doesn't reach you and leaves a message saying "I'll call again tomorrow", then he calls tomorrow, but doesn't reach you again and then says "I'll try you again later"....should the girl just try calling him back? Or should the girl just wait until he calls again? I never know what to do when a guy calls but I miss the call. One of my friends said after not answering two times that the guy would think i was blowing him off if I didn't call back....but what if he doesn't specifically say "call me back??"
Why is this an issue at all? Just phone him back damn it...jeeez...Anyone would think you had a real problem
Reply 17
I think it is the guy who should always call back, that way it makes the guy wonder what you are not replying and at the same time it would make him want to see and talk to you even more.
Don’t blank him completely though, cause he will start looking for someone else.

just call him back. Oh gosh, the phone is ringing! Should I pick it up? *rushes to TSR and creates poll*

Maybe next time you should rush to TSR and not reply to any of the topics?

Why is this an issue at all? Just phone him back damn it...jeeez...Anyone would think you had a real problem

A useful comment N.2
Reply 18
Wahoowa, if the guy is a Brit (not sure where you are in the world right now, you may be studying in the UK), he'll kind of expect you to call him back. If the guy's an American, then there is a culture difference, and as such you'll have to make up your own mind!!
yeah its the 21st century after all. we wanted equality so there it is....unless your an old fashioned romantic and like the guy to do all the chasing