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Why am I self-destructing like this?
So its 1:30am and I have college tomorrow, and I know I should really go to bed, but I just won't for some reason. I am always doing this and similar things like it, and even though i know it's not good for me I want to do it anyway.
For example I'm doing exams right now and can't be bothered to revise. I've got coursework that I need to start, and have had weeks to start it, but I just can't be bothered for some reason. Sometimes there are days when I just don't bother going to college, for no good reason. Sometimes it's because I was up too late the night before and am too tired, other times it's simply because I'd much rather sit at home in the warm watching tv.
What is wrong with me? It's like I haven't got any motivation to do anything useful with my life. I don't ever eat healthily and only wash, etc when I have to, like if I'm going out the house somewhere. I have things I want to do with my life, books I want to read, places I want to go, instruments I want to learn to play, but I don't feel like I can bring myself to do anything more than sit at my computer or watch tv all day. I suppose in a way I am just plain lazy, but it feels like it must be more than that, and it seems to get worse everyday. Do you think I might be depressed or something? I'm really concerned about how this lack of motivation to work and look after myself is going to affect my health and grades and so on.
For example I'm doing exams right now and can't be bothered to revise. I've got coursework that I need to start, and have had weeks to start it, but I just can't be bothered for some reason. Sometimes there are days when I just don't bother going to college, for no good reason. Sometimes it's because I was up too late the night before and am too tired, other times it's simply because I'd much rather sit at home in the warm watching tv.
What is wrong with me? It's like I haven't got any motivation to do anything useful with my life. I don't ever eat healthily and only wash, etc when I have to, like if I'm going out the house somewhere. I have things I want to do with my life, books I want to read, places I want to go, instruments I want to learn to play, but I don't feel like I can bring myself to do anything more than sit at my computer or watch tv all day. I suppose in a way I am just plain lazy, but it feels like it must be more than that, and it seems to get worse everyday. Do you think I might be depressed or something? I'm really concerned about how this lack of motivation to work and look after myself is going to affect my health and grades and so on.
Anonymous
It's like I haven't got any motivation to do anything useful with my life. I don't ever eat healthily and only wash, etc when I have to,
This quote gives you your answer, so basically yes it does sound like depression to me,
Have you been having any problems recentley or been under any pressure and strain with college or anything???
MNBStyle
Have you been having any problems recentley or been under any pressure and strain with college or anything???
Have you been having any problems recentley or been under any pressure and strain with college or anything???
God the list of problems and pressures seems endless. I don't want to go into it all too much, but yeah problems at home include my dad having issues with stress and alcohol and me generally being concerned for my mum's health all the time.
Pressures with college are mostly due to the fact that half the people think I'm a freak or something (or at least a bit weird). And I'm applying to uni so I've got the usual pressures of getting the grades.
I guess I kinda know I'm depressed or stressed or something, but sometimes I feel all right and I suppose I've spent such a long time coping that I've lost sight of what normality is so I can't tell if I've got a problem or if its just normal to feel this way.
why post anonymously?
Your description sounds a lot like what I am (look at the time now), apart from bunking off college. I stay up every night till 2am, its been a habit of mine for over a year now. Even on exam nights I stay up till 2am, which I know is not good for me, but perhaps my body has got used to it by now.
I just go on the computer all day when I have time, at least you watch tv, I hardly watch tv now to be honest. I used to be VERY dedicated in AS i.e. do lots of background reading and trying to remeber everything in the text book, but that only gave me average grades. But I have learnt being concise is better than knowing everything, so laziness for me isn't that much of a problem.
I sometimes feel I just can't be bothered with all this work and school, wishing I was a child again, with no responsibilities.
Don't worry, there are many other people in the same boat as you
Your description sounds a lot like what I am (look at the time now), apart from bunking off college. I stay up every night till 2am, its been a habit of mine for over a year now. Even on exam nights I stay up till 2am, which I know is not good for me, but perhaps my body has got used to it by now.
I just go on the computer all day when I have time, at least you watch tv, I hardly watch tv now to be honest. I used to be VERY dedicated in AS i.e. do lots of background reading and trying to remeber everything in the text book, but that only gave me average grades. But I have learnt being concise is better than knowing everything, so laziness for me isn't that much of a problem.
I sometimes feel I just can't be bothered with all this work and school, wishing I was a child again, with no responsibilities.
Don't worry, there are many other people in the same boat as you
Anonymous
I guess I kinda know I'm depressed or stressed or something, but sometimes I feel all right and I suppose I've spent such a long time coping that I've lost sight of what normality is so I can't tell if I've got a problem or if its just normal to feel this way.
Thats very true and normal to feel like that if you been coping with these depressed feelings for such a long time,
that it becomes you basically, but it seems like you do have depression so if its effecting your work you may want to consider counselling.
I had the same problem as you when i was depressed and in 6th form, basically i couldn't be bothered to go and would rather stay indoors etc to relax.
So i know how it feels.
Welcome to PM me anytime if you like aswell
Ok maybe your circumstance is a little worse...
Jesus, if I didn't know better I'd have thought this was written by me about a week ago - and it literally does change like that.
I sent my UCAS off on Monday - my mates, mum, dad, grandparents, aunties and uncles, people on TSR, people I don't even KNOW had been nagging me since WELL before christmas. But I did it when I wanted to, about a week after anyone bar my mum had asked
Infact I told everyone I had done it before I actually had just so that they would stop nagging me and I'd do it.
I've started making revision cards - yes, it's a bit late and yes, I didn't go to college today but all of a sudden I have this motivation, this feeling of wanting to DO something. Stretch myself. Find thing that I don't understand not because I can't be arsed but because it's above my level and I've reached the peak of my knowledge. I can soak up information like a sponge, I just never wanted to.
I was like that since about year 9, when I gave up working and started coasting. Doing well enough to get by but not doing half of what I was able to do. Basically it isn't depression it's just lack of motivation and its a temporary glitch. Until you find yourself waking up WANTING to do something with your life, you're just gonna have to try your best to survive, I suppose
I sent my UCAS off on Monday - my mates, mum, dad, grandparents, aunties and uncles, people on TSR, people I don't even KNOW had been nagging me since WELL before christmas. But I did it when I wanted to, about a week after anyone bar my mum had asked
Infact I told everyone I had done it before I actually had just so that they would stop nagging me and I'd do it.I've started making revision cards - yes, it's a bit late and yes, I didn't go to college today but all of a sudden I have this motivation, this feeling of wanting to DO something. Stretch myself. Find thing that I don't understand not because I can't be arsed but because it's above my level and I've reached the peak of my knowledge. I can soak up information like a sponge, I just never wanted to.
I was like that since about year 9, when I gave up working and started coasting. Doing well enough to get by but not doing half of what I was able to do. Basically it isn't depression it's just lack of motivation and its a temporary glitch. Until you find yourself waking up WANTING to do something with your life, you're just gonna have to try your best to survive, I suppose
MNBStyle
I had the same problem as you when i was depressed and in 6th form, basically i couldn't be bothered to go and would rather stay indoors etc to relax.
So i know how it feels.
So i know how it feels.
hey I do that, I used to go out skateboarding everyday and get drunk when I was doing GCSE's, but now I hardly socialise, I don't know why. Perhpas I'm just using my A-levels as an excuse....
It sounds like lack of motivation. It's hard to be enthusiastic about stuff you're not interested about i.e. work etc. Almost ruined me during my A levels, but I was real lucky and got away with it. Now I have more to motivate me, the threat of being kicked off does wonders for the ol' concentration. If the problem is really that serious, maybe you should reconsider where you are going with what you are doing, plans and so on.
gordon2002
hey I do that, I used to go out skateboarding everyday and get drunk when I was doing GCSE's, but now I hardly socialise, I don't know why. Perhpas I'm just using my A-levels as an excuse....
Some people just stay on at school/college to either get out of getting a job, or to stay intouch with some friends more.
Not that im suggesting thats what you or anyone else here is doing, just what i know to be true about some people.
MNBStyle
but it seems like you do have depression so if its effecting your work you may want to consider counselling.
but it seems like you do have depression so if its effecting your work you may want to consider counselling.
I really would like to try counselling or something, I just feel like I've got that many issues though I don't think I'd know where to start. But yeah I have considered it. I went to my GP about a year ago because I was having real trouble sleeping, he asked me if I'd got any more problems and I was too scared to say, now I've been too embarrassed to go back to him since.
If I want to see a counsellor is there a way I can do it without getting my GP or parents involved? Like I say, I'd rather not have to see my GP again, and my parents have got too many other things to worry about besides me.
Anonymous
I really would like to try counselling or something, I just feel like I've got that many issues though I don't think I'd know where to start. But yeah I have considered it. I went to my GP about a year ago because I was having real trouble sleeping, he asked me if I'd got any more problems and I was too scared to say, now I've been too embarrassed to go back to him since.
If I want to see a counsellor is there a way I can do it without getting my GP or parents involved? Like I say, I'd rather not have to see my GP again, and my parents have got too many other things to worry about besides me.
If I want to see a counsellor is there a way I can do it without getting my GP or parents involved? Like I say, I'd rather not have to see my GP again, and my parents have got too many other things to worry about besides me.
You could just go and see another doctor maybe if thats possible??? but you shouldn't be embarassed about seeing your GP again, he/she would understand why you didnt say anything before.
And counselling should be all confidential for you anyway, so no reason for your parents to know unless you told them.
MNBStyle
You could just go and see another doctor maybe if thats possible???
I might try and arrange an appointment or something with a different GP. Then I'll have all the concerns of hiding it from my parents I guess. See how worries just mount up.
Anyone else feeling as majorly depressed, unmotivated and crushed by worries you can't handle right now, or is it just me?
Anonymous
So its 1:30am and I have college tomorrow, and I know I should really go to bed, but I just won't for some reason. I am always doing this and similar things like it, and even though i know it's not good for me I want to do it anyway.
For example I'm doing exams right now and can't be bothered to revise. I've got coursework that I need to start, and have had weeks to start it, but I just can't be bothered for some reason. Sometimes there are days when I just don't bother going to college, for no good reason. Sometimes it's because I was up too late the night before and am too tired, other times it's simply because I'd much rather sit at home in the warm watching tv.
What is wrong with me? It's like I haven't got any motivation to do anything useful with my life. I don't ever eat healthily and only wash, etc when I have to, like if I'm going out the house somewhere. I have things I want to do with my life, books I want to read, places I want to go, instruments I want to learn to play, but I don't feel like I can bring myself to do anything more than sit at my computer or watch tv all day. I suppose in a way I am just plain lazy, but it feels like it must be more than that, and it seems to get worse everyday. Do you think I might be depressed or something? I'm really concerned about how this lack of motivation to work and look after myself is going to affect my health and grades and so on.
For example I'm doing exams right now and can't be bothered to revise. I've got coursework that I need to start, and have had weeks to start it, but I just can't be bothered for some reason. Sometimes there are days when I just don't bother going to college, for no good reason. Sometimes it's because I was up too late the night before and am too tired, other times it's simply because I'd much rather sit at home in the warm watching tv.
What is wrong with me? It's like I haven't got any motivation to do anything useful with my life. I don't ever eat healthily and only wash, etc when I have to, like if I'm going out the house somewhere. I have things I want to do with my life, books I want to read, places I want to go, instruments I want to learn to play, but I don't feel like I can bring myself to do anything more than sit at my computer or watch tv all day. I suppose in a way I am just plain lazy, but it feels like it must be more than that, and it seems to get worse everyday. Do you think I might be depressed or something? I'm really concerned about how this lack of motivation to work and look after myself is going to affect my health and grades and so on.
It's like I'm reading my own testimony. Don't worry, you're not alone. The best thing to do is talk about it with someone.
Anonymous
I might try and arrange an appointment or something with a different GP. Then I'll have all the concerns of hiding it from my parents I guess. See how worries just mount up.
Anyone else feeling as majorly depressed, unmotivated and crushed by worries you can't handle right now, or is it just me?
Anyone else feeling as majorly depressed, unmotivated and crushed by worries you can't handle right now, or is it just me?
When i read you initial post i felt like i could have written it to the letter. I am in the exact same situation and feeling the exact same things right now. Im in my second year of uni and really need to get off my ar*e and revise but i can't be bothered.
I don't have the same causes of stress as you, i have a stable family to run too but i have been under a lot of stress lately. One of my close friends has been screwing me and my house mates around as he was meant to live with us but decided to take a year out at the last minute and now after 6 months has stopped paying rent so the other 4 of us have to cover it.
My best friend has stopped talking to me and has turned a number of other of her friends against me so i have been getting abusive messages from them. i was also going to live with her next year but found out a few weeks ago that im not anymore and her bf is moving in to the room i was going to live in so i now have nowhere to live next year and no one to live with. Added to that is exam stress and the fact i have to get at least 55% in my exams to do the Masters course i want to do instead of a Bachelors.
Have been thinking about counselling myself but don't know where to start really
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