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Self harm

Why do people do it?

Am i the only one here?

Reply 1

MNBStyle

9

Anonymous

Why do people do it?

Am i the only one here?

Many reasons why people do it, it could be

1: Cry for help
2: Because they like the feeling of pain
3: They feel they should punish themselves.
4: Because there just fed up of everything

Theres 4 reasons and im sure theres alot more, but your not the only one trust me.
There was a thread about it awhile back

Reply 2

I do

I started a few months ago and I knew it was stupid but its got worse since splitting with bf. I can't control it. I feel so ashamed of myself and hate myself for it. I t seems to help when I'm doing it but afterwards it just makes things worse.

Reply 3

MNBStyle

9

Anonymous

I feel so ashamed of myself and hate myself for it.

The quote above, is one thing you got to stop thinking, sure its good that you realise its a bad thing to do, but feeling ashamed and hating yourself will make the situation worse.
You considered counselling???
Feel free to PM me anytime by the way if you want to talk, i would keep your TSR name confidential course :smile:

Reply 4

Monkey_Maiden

11

MNBStyle

The quote above, is one thing you got to stop thinking, sure its good that you realise its a bad thing to do, but feeling ashamed and hating yourself will make the situation worse.
You considered counselling???
Feel free to PM me anytime by the way if you want to talk, i would keep your TSR name confidential course :smile:

I tried it and the guy seemed to kinda judge me a bit, he brought it up in everything all the time, I know this might have been trying to help but I ust felt worse him talking bout it with me :frown:

It's normally triggered off by something stupid not someone not picking up their phone :frown:

Reply 5

saoirse

10

i guess its a bit like an ed...seems to give relief when your self harming/ making yourself sick/ binging...but after you just despise yourself

Reply 6

MNBStyle

9

Monkey_Maiden

I tried it and the guy seemed to kinda judge me a bit, he brought it up in everything all the time, I know this might have been trying to help but I ust felt worse him talking bout it with me :frown:

It's normally triggered off by something stupid not someone not picking up their phone :frown:

Of course you wont like some counsellors, but some will be very good as i had a very good counsellor once

Reply 7

I do it because i hate myself.

I feel that wherever i go i hurt people's feelings and i always ruin things for myself. Therfore it makes me feel better to hurt myself.

Reply 8

MNBStyle

9

Anonymous

I do it because i hate myself.

I feel that wherever i go i hurt people's feelings and i always ruin things for myself. Therfore it makes me feel better to hurt myself.

Well i did say that would probablly be one of the reasons.
In your cases its you feel you deserve to punish yourself.
But you dont, and people will help you realise this. me included if i have to :wink:

Reply 9

Monkey_Maiden

11

Anonymous

I do it because i hate myself.

I feel that wherever i go i hurt people's feelings and i always ruin things for myself. Therfore it makes me feel better to hurt myself.

I'msimilar except I do it because I'm scred I let people down all the time, my parents, my friends, my bf etc :frown:

Reply 10

I've been doing it on and off for nearly 4 years, and for me it's about being in control and also punishing myself for anything I think I've done wrong. The scary thing is when you get out of control. That's only happened to me once and I've never been so petrified in all my life!

Reply 11

warranty-ideal

12

Because it's something in life you control totally, a parity not reflecting in much else. The feeling of pain is honest, pain never lies, pain is what it is, pain will always be there; by choosing to embrace pain you can take some control back from the chaos that can be life at times.
Self harming is often mis-understood as suicidal, when they are very different things.

Reply 12

scutt

1

To remind yourself you can still feel, and that you're human.

Reply 13

Lirael Abhorsen

1

it sounds like a sub conscious desire for equality i.e. you want to feel justice if you feel you are hurting people around you as some people seem to be suggesting via the punishment idea..

Reply 14

It's purging emotion in a physical action. Makes you feel like you've done something about it, whatever 'it' is.

Sometimes I'm angry and my violent tendancies mean I want to hurt something. Since I'm morally against hurting others it's either myself or an inanimate object! But I hate damaging things, so usually me. I heal stupidly fast, no harm done really.

Reply 15

Monkey_Maiden

11

fragreaper

Because it's something in life you control totally, a parity not reflecting in much else. The feeling of pain is honest, pain never lies, pain is what it is, pain will always be there; by choosing to embrace pain you can take some control back from the chaos that can be life at times.
Self harming is often mis-understood as suicidal, when they are very different things.

Thats exactly right :frown:

Reply 16

warranty-ideal

12

Monkey_Maiden

Thats exactly right :frown:

Big hug

PM if you need to talk :smile:

Reply 17

Nysh

1

I don't, but a friend told me it was because the pain of the harm just feels so much better than the mental anguish that's causing it.

Reply 18

xXMessedUpXx

15

Anonymous

Why do people do it?

Am i the only one here?

You're not the only person here

In fact a lot of people self-harm. And obviously there are a lot of different reasons, for every person there's their own reason. There are a small MINORITY of people who due it for attention or because they think it's cool. However many people tend to tar all self-harmers with the same brush, which is unfair and inaccurate.

My own personal reasons are that its quite heavily related to my depression (which i've had for going on 9 years now), and that during the time when i was bullied, i didn't really have the ability to cope well with what was happening, and i took things out on myself, partly becasue i blamed myself for what was happening, and partly because i was so angry that they were doing it to me. It does sound somewhat backwards i admit, but its rarely something that makes sense.

Self harm isn't a good thing. Its a maladaptive coping mechanism. You feel better for a short while, but always feel worse after, and it doesn't solve your problems.

Its also something which has a certain stigma attached to it. Not many people are tolerant of it, tho personally i think a lot of that can be explained by a lack of undxerstanding of it.

If you find you are self harming and want to stop, then I would advise seeing your doctor. They won't "lock you up" or think you're "crazy". Its actually a very common thing, and they do see quite a lot of it so know how to cope with it. There are also a varity of internet souces (may i suggest the Bodies Under Siege web board) that can offer support and more information

Sorry for the long post, hope that mighthelp a bit.

Reply 19

Ferrus

19

I know of three girls who are doing it, or did... and from what they said it is the only way to release the inner torment... in a sense it is a "valve" for the immense acculmalation of intense feeling. However from their experience it usually makes things worse in the long run.

Self harm

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