Uni friend experience.

Hey, I was just wondering if people could give me honest advice on University friends? I started on the 17th September and still feel pretty lonely.
The Uni I'm at is massive; which I thought would be a good thing but actually means you meet someone once (not enough to become 'best friends' obviously) and never see them again. I have plenty of peoples numbers on my phone who I've met whilst drunk and have no idea who they are.
I'm friends with my flatmates but there's only 6 of us and we're completely different. I like them but we don't 'click'.
Also, in my course I've met a couple of people but I feel like it's so hard to actually get to know people properly without meeting someone and straight away being like, 'wanna go for a coffee?!' after talking to them for 5 minutes, which to me seems a bit desperate.

I know I'm the kind of person who needs the best friend, and then I'm happy. And I'm aware these relationships take time. It's just, on facebook I see people uploading tonnes of photos and OF COURSE when I ask them how it's going they're like, 'It's amazing!' because everyone wants others to think they're doing so well.
I'm just wondering, can people give their honest experience of Uni? Please don't tell me (unless it's true!) that you made friends on the first day and within a week you had best friends etc. I'm wondering if I'm having a normal experience; that it takes longer to make friends/fit in than people advertise at Uni.
Someone told me it took their whole first year to meet people who they thought they'd click with and stick with for life. Is this a common experience?
Please help, thanks so much!

Reply 1

Trigger

I was at uni for two years, never made a single "real" friend and sure as hell don't keep in touch with them. Though in fairness my heart wasnt in it.

(edited 12 years ago)

Reply 2

marcusmerehay

I didn't even start going out/meeting people until the Xmas of my first year, and so I only started talking to people on my course very gradually.

Give it time, it's only been a few weeks - the more you see people, the more you'll get to know them and the better you'll get on. :h:

Reply 3

Mehlaine

Thanks for replying so quick, and for not giving me stupid advice (which I was expecting someone to do).
I appreciate that! And the whole Christmas thing's made me feel better :smile:

thank you x

Reply 4

123Josh123

Well freshers was hell really, I went out with some people in my halls, but we didn't 'click' either. I would say hi to them, but that was about it. In my first week of uni lectures, I met someone and we spoke a little but not much at all, within a month we were really good friends and meeting lots of other people, now I have 3 really close friends at uni. My best advice would be to keep talking to people, and asking to go out for a drink isn't desperate!! If you are finding it really difficult to make friends, then join a society. What uni are you at?

(edited 12 years ago)

Reply 5

dumdumdumdidum

I didn't really click with anyone in my halls. On the first day of my course I met two other people and we went for lunch that day, stayed friends throughout the 3years but only to chat to around uni. My real friends came from my course and I would say we were good friends by the end of November time. At the end of uni my best friends were from my first year seminar classes.

Reply 6

jelly1000

I wouldn't say I have anyone I can classify as a friend really atm, been here 3 weeks. Flatmates are nice but we don't have a great deal in common, and I only really know one person outside of my flat well enough to go out with. It's hard to make friends on my course because of the short hours (8) plus the fact most people just hang around with their flat really so they aren't interested in making friends with coursemates.