The Student Room Group

Money & family relationships...

I know - never lend or borrow from family but anyway..

My parents loaned me some money a few years ago to buy a small flat to live in while I was at uni. The agreement was that after uni I would sell the flat, and give them back what they'd paid for it and I'd get to keep the profit.
When I did sell it, it had over doubled in value so naturally they decided they wanted some of the profit (which is unverstandable!) but my dad has said he wants it all. I don't think that's fair (no surprises). Because they live overseas they've avoided a degree of tax on the profit as the property was in my name and was listed as my home so the profit in theory is tax free. My mum is being a bit more generous, saying we should split the profit but my dad is 100% after all of it.

Any thoughts on how we come to an agreement? A compromise?

:confused:
Reply 1
Concentrate on keeping your mom on your side (eg using phone calls etc and not being too forcely about it) and use her to manipulte your dad :biggrin:
Makes the points such as - had you not stayed in the flat; it would not have been bought + no one to look after it etc + the initial agreement + how your the favourite son etc :p:
Reply 2
If they said before that you keep the profit, I don't see why that's changed? As a token, because they're family and it's gone up so much, I'd give them half of the profit, but it's up to you, not them.
Reply 3
I find it really bizarre that parents "loan" their children money - as in big sums that they demand back. I dont think my parents would ever do that, as they say, they cant take the money with them when they go!

Can you not explain to your parents why you think its unfair? I dont see why you cant just give back what they loaned you, plus a little extra as interest, so maybe like a bank loan would be?
Reply 4
At first I was pretty bummed about it because I thought the same - we had a deal and now they want to change the rules. I figured on it as a loan, the bank doesn't ask for double the amount back because you can afford it now.
I think giving them back the original amount then splitting the profit 50/50 is fair but my dad is having none of it.

I haven't mentioned that the money came through a few days ago because I can't stand another row about it lol. I guess when I head off at the weekend I can mention it - so I'm not around for the fallout.
Reply 5
Just split the money 50/50 and give it to your mum. Or give it to you dad and point out that he specifically stated that you could keep all the profit, but that you'd like to give something back as a thanks. You're being gracious here, you're giving them more than they agreed to in the first place. If he doesn't accept it, take it all and point that that was the agreement, and if he's going to be nasty you're going to stick to it.
Reply 6
I mean the way I see it, when the bank gives you a loan you pay THEM interest, not the other way round. I know its sucky that he's not going to honour his agreement but look at it this way: you got a good couple of years' free accomodation out of them... Most people are not that lucky.
Reply 7
naelse
look at it this way: you got a good couple of years' free accomodation out of them... Most people are not that lucky.
:ditto:

Keep your mum on your side and say it's no fair to change the agreement and don't go over 50%! :p:
Reply 8
Seems fair enough, you did agree to it after all and if it wasn't for that agreement you wouldn't have had the flat in the first place. You should count yourself lucky.

To be honest trying to grab money off of your parents, who have probably supported you all their life and may well be planning uses for that money (after they retire etc), is a rather horrible way of acting.
Reply 9
LibertineNorth
Seems fair enough, you did agree to it after all and if it wasn't for that agreement you wouldn't have had the flat in the first place. You should count yourself lucky.

To be honest trying to grab money off of your parents, who have probably supported you all their life and may well be planning uses for that money (after they retire etc), is a rather horrible way of acting.

He didn't agree to it. Their parents agreed to give him the profit. I'd say they were trying to grab money off him, not the other way around.
Reply 10
Ah, failed to read properly.

In that case I support you wholeheartedly. Your profit is yours.