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Silly things boys say...
Ok...so I'm probably overreacting. But my boyfriend and I were out tonight, just joking around having a light-hearted conversation, when I asked him who I thought was the fittest girl out my group of friends. And he said another girl! And then "and then you". I know I shouldn't have asked if I couldn't take it etc etc but it really hurt. And I can't believe he didn't just say me! I mean come on, he must have realised it would upset me! Am I just being silly or was he being insensitive? Anyway, just thought I'd have a moan!
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Maybe he thought you were being serious and wanted an honest answer. To be honest you really shouldn't have asked.
Angel_Cake
Ok...so I'm probably overreacting. But my boyfriend and I were out tonight, just joking around having a light-hearted conversation, when I asked him who I thought was the fittest girl out my group of friends. And he said another girl! And then "and then you". I know I shouldn't have asked if I couldn't take it etc etc but it really hurt. And I can't believe he didn't just say me! I mean come on, he must have realised it would upset me! Am I just being silly or was he being insensitive? Anyway, just thought I'd have a moan!
If you ask a stupid question...
Indeed, boys do say silly things. But you should know that! If you were to ask a girl who you thought was prettier, you or this other girl, the girl would of course say you. But boys, damn them, with their honesty just spilling out like that... you need to train your man 
'Who's the fairest of them all'
'Why, you my dearest...'
'Who's the fairest of them all'
'Why, you my dearest...'
grace
well i for one think it's a horrible thing for him to have said. don't give him any for a long, long time. Or call out his best friend's name next time you're in the throes of passion 
I like the sound of that
grace
well i for one think it's a horrible thing for him to have said. don't give him any for a long, long time. Or call out his best friend's name next time you're in the throes of passion
Thank you! You make me feel better. I know it's hardly a dumpable offence. But it was mean and made me feel rubbish! Why couldn't he have thought before he spoke?!
Angel_Cake
Ok...so I'm probably overreacting. But my boyfriend and I were out tonight, just joking around having a light-hearted conversation, when I asked him who I thought was the fittest girl out my group of friends. And he said another girl! And then "and then you". I know I shouldn't have asked if I couldn't take it etc etc but it really hurt. And I can't believe he didn't just say me! I mean come on, he must have realised it would upset me! Am I just being silly or was he being insensitive? Anyway, just thought I'd have a moan!
if my bf said that, he would get a slap slraight away.
he is always commenting on other girls though.. i know he is joking.
I don't think your boyfriend would have said this to hurt you. Boys can be insensitive without realising it.
He could have thought that you were perhaps meaning other girls in your group, but when he saw the look on your face, realised it included you and tried to make up for it? I dunno, I wasn't there *shrugs*
Remember, looks aren't everything! There's also personality. He's going out with YOU, not her! Surely that says alot? If he didn't want to be with you, he wouldn't be.
And by giving you an honest answer, it shows he's comfortable around you, and feels he doesn't need to lie.
These are just my thoughts on the subject, so could be wrong. If it really bothered you that much, tell your boyfriend... I'm sure he'll wanna know if he's hurt you so he won't do it again?
Luv Claire
He could have thought that you were perhaps meaning other girls in your group, but when he saw the look on your face, realised it included you and tried to make up for it? I dunno, I wasn't there *shrugs*
Remember, looks aren't everything! There's also personality. He's going out with YOU, not her! Surely that says alot? If he didn't want to be with you, he wouldn't be.
And by giving you an honest answer, it shows he's comfortable around you, and feels he doesn't need to lie.
These are just my thoughts on the subject, so could be wrong. If it really bothered you that much, tell your boyfriend... I'm sure he'll wanna know if he's hurt you so he won't do it again?
Luv Claire
He was probably just joking around, did you make a big deal about being hurt? If not, he probably didn't even realise.
As inconsiderate of him to say it though, that is something that annoys me about girls; asking questions that they pretend they want an honest answer when they really just want to be complimented. I'm not saying you were pining for attention or him to be soppy or anything, but its one of those "he says the right thing, the whole conversation is forgotten in two minutes, say the wrong thing it never goes away", a "danger question" if you will.
Don't read too much into it, us boys don't always think!
As inconsiderate of him to say it though, that is something that annoys me about girls; asking questions that they pretend they want an honest answer when they really just want to be complimented. I'm not saying you were pining for attention or him to be soppy or anything, but its one of those "he says the right thing, the whole conversation is forgotten in two minutes, say the wrong thing it never goes away", a "danger question" if you will.
Don't read too much into it, us boys don't always think!
all the boys who are saying it's no big deal need to stop trying to be all high and mighty and insinuating it is petty to be upset by it, i'm sure you'd all be upset about something similar...
i remember when i accidentally told my ex that my ex-ex had a bigger man-meat than he did. Boy was he upset.
But [innocent voice] i was just being honest!!!! [/innocent voice].
i remember when i accidentally told my ex that my ex-ex had a bigger man-meat than he did. Boy was he upset.
But [innocent voice] i was just being honest!!!! [/innocent voice].
I can see how you could have been hurt by it, but I think you probably saw it the wrong way...but maybe I am wrong depending on the way he said it - but look at it this way, if your bf says something that elicits you to compliment him, do you ALWAYS compliment him directly? Maybe you will say the opposite but say it in a way that obviously doesn't communicate that you literally feel that way, e.g. bf: "Wanna go out someplace tonight?" gf: "If you make it worth my while" - it's not as if the gf certainly doesn't want to go out with him unless he makes it special, it's just a statement that communicates she is confident and doesn't feel that he'll do whatever he says, but at the same time does actually want to go out with him.
[QUOTE=i remember when i accidentally told my ex that my ex-ex had a bigger man-meat than he did. Boy was he upset.
But [innocent voice] i was just being honest!!!! [/innocent voice].
Reply With Quote
Depends how it's said doesn't it? If it's said in a way like "you were half the man my ex was" then it will hurt, but if it's done in a teasing way then it can be humorous - similar to this situation (although describing ex's is a bit different). If the OP's bf emphasised the fact that the other girl was more "fit" than the other by stressing it or the way he said it, then perhaps it was hurtful, but most of the time people say this sort of thing it's humorous.
[QUOTE=i remember when i accidentally told my ex that my ex-ex had a bigger man-meat than he did. Boy was he upset.
But [innocent voice] i was just being honest!!!! [/innocent voice].
Reply With Quote
Depends how it's said doesn't it? If it's said in a way like "you were half the man my ex was" then it will hurt, but if it's done in a teasing way then it can be humorous - similar to this situation (although describing ex's is a bit different). If the OP's bf emphasised the fact that the other girl was more "fit" than the other by stressing it or the way he said it, then perhaps it was hurtful, but most of the time people say this sort of thing it's humorous.
Somebody
I don't think your boyfriend would have said this to hurt you. Boys can be insensitive without realising it.
He could have thought that you were perhaps meaning other girls in your group, but when he saw the look on your face, realised it included you and tried to make up for it? I dunno, I wasn't there *shrugs*
Remember, looks aren't everything! There's also personality. He's going out with YOU, not her! Surely that says alot? If he didn't want to be with you, he wouldn't be.
And by giving you an honest answer, it shows he's comfortable around you, and feels he doesn't need to lie.
These are just my thoughts on the subject, so could be wrong. If it really bothered you that much, tell your boyfriend... I'm sure he'll wanna know if he's hurt you so he won't do it again?
Luv Claire
He could have thought that you were perhaps meaning other girls in your group, but when he saw the look on your face, realised it included you and tried to make up for it? I dunno, I wasn't there *shrugs*
Remember, looks aren't everything! There's also personality. He's going out with YOU, not her! Surely that says alot? If he didn't want to be with you, he wouldn't be.
And by giving you an honest answer, it shows he's comfortable around you, and feels he doesn't need to lie.
These are just my thoughts on the subject, so could be wrong. If it really bothered you that much, tell your boyfriend... I'm sure he'll wanna know if he's hurt you so he won't do it again?
Luv Claire
Thanks
I might mention it, or maybe it would be better just to put it to the back of my mind. Guess I should be thankful I'm second best, lol. Thanks for the advice anyway. He's so stupid. But maybe I wouldn't love him if he wasn't so honest...I don't know.
Whine whine whine, don't want to know then don't ask. If it's just an ego thing you're after, go for safe questions like "Do you think I'm pretty" or whatever, but for god's sake don't ask a boy to make a relative comparison, because we panic. The slightest hesitation in our voice "Um, you of course" and you pounce "Oh, so you don't think I'm the most attractive! Why don't you just sleep with all my friends then!? God, why are all men such PIGS!"
And to be honest, it sounds like he was joking anyway
And to be honest, it sounds like he was joking anyway
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