anger

i have (literally) just had to come to terms with the fact that i have a major anger problem. anything and everything sets me off... from little things people type on the internet, to my boyfriend wanting to do anything.. normally things come to a head when my boyfriend does something (as you who have read my other posts will have seen..) and i end up literally attacking him. it doesn't hurt him, i can't punch to save my life, but it seems to be the only good way i can relieve anger. either physical or verbal.. i shout too because i feel i can't be heard otherwise.
i have also managed to trace back to where it all started - which was when i was little and all of my so called friends used to blame anything that went wrong in the playground on me. of course, i was the only one with the true story but no teacher was going to believe my account over 4 or 5 other childrens accounts.. this used to really annoy me and i got so angry sometimes. i felt i was treated unfairly and that no one would listen to me eventhough it was me telling the truth.
anyway, obviously this isn't making me a very nice person to be around. i don't really know why i am posting this on here either - i should just go straight to my doctor and sort out something that will calm me down.
i was just wondering really if anyone else has the same, or a similar problem with getting angry, and how they deal with it, or calm down, or whether there is something that they take or any good books someone could recommend.
thanks.

Reply 1

El Scotto

15

get one of those inflatable punchbags to take your agression out on, might make ya feel better? or maybe you could channel it into some sport or something? or failing that pillows?

Reply 2

sr4470

15

Humour is therapeutic. Works for me anyway.

Reply 3

Mangaroo

12

"i have also managed to trace back to where it all started - which was when i was little and all of my so called friends used to blame anything that went wrong in the playground on me. of course, i was the only one with the true story but no teacher was going to believe my account over 4 or 5 other childrens accounts.. this used to really annoy me and i got so angry sometimes. i felt i was treated unfairly and that no one would listen to me eventhough it was me telling the truth."

Lol...sorry but how pathetic is that pumpkin....
...although about lashing out at people...i think its more of a counseller thing then a doctor problem...would you rather sort it out permenantly or just keep it on edge as long as you take some pills :smile:

... i know this person, whenver you touch a specific part (not sexual) of their body, they HAVE to attack you..not the same thing..just thought it was cool...anyway....if you are actually shouting and attacking your boyfriend id seek a counseller...to sort out the REAL cause/problem...not some lame story that has been expeirienced by EVERYONE =)

Reply 4

Mata

16

Mangaroo

"i have also managed to trace back to where it all started - which was when i was little and all of my so called friends used to blame anything that went wrong in the playground on me. of course, i was the only one with the true story but no teacher was going to believe my account over 4 or 5 other childrens accounts.. this used to really annoy me and i got so angry sometimes. i felt i was treated unfairly and that no one would listen to me eventhough it was me telling the truth."

Lol...sorry but how pathetic is that pumpkin....
...although about lashing out at people...i think its more of a counseller thing then a doctor problem...would you rather sort it out permenantly or just keep it on edge as long as you take some pills :smile:

... i know this person, whenver you touch a specific part (not sexual) of their body, they HAVE to attack you..not the same thing..just thought it was cool...anyway....if you are actually shouting and attacking your boyfriend id seek a counseller...to sort out the REAL cause/problem...not some lame story that has been expeirienced by EVERYONE =)

Actually, I never experienced that. You have no right to tell the OP that her feelings are wrong. I say that with all due respect but from a psychological point of view it seems utterly possible that prolonged exposure to that sort of situation would cause someone to feel and behave in a certain way.

We are all who we are because of past events, and those events don't have to be mammoth or 'life changing' to effect us. I think that it is extremely admirable that the OP has identified her problem and is trying to find it's route - that is the surest way to successfully beating the problem. Once you know why you act, you can take steps to try to control it.

Anyway, to the OP: phsyically attacking people is unnacceptable as one day you might attack someone that can't fight back. Perhaps an anger management course might be a good move, as they can help you deal with the roots of your anger, and the results of your anger.

Reply 5

Mangaroo

12

i have every right to voice my opinion..i UBERLY doubt thats the cause and id advise you to see a counseller and not waste time in a lame anger reject group.

Reply 6

Mata

16

Mangaroo

i have every right to voice my opinion..i UBERLY doubt thats the cause and id advise you to see a counseller and not waste time in a lame anger reject group.

I'm sorry, I don't understand how you can say, "your reason for your behaviour is lame" - paraphrasing there. People behave in certain ways for all manner of reasons. If this isn't the cause (bearing in mind that the reason she lashes out corrolates with the reason she first began to feel extreme feelings of anger) then what is more likely?

I don't think that the OP should immediately seek counselling for her problem. Yes, she may have some psychological issues but she is aware of them and is seeking to do something active to stop them. An anger management group can do that for her. Specific one-to-one anger therapy would be helpful, too. However I wouldn't recommend general counselling.

And 'lame' anger management groups do actually help people.

Reply 7

Zymoen

Pumpkin

To even acknowledge that something like this is a problem must have taken a degree of courage, and for that I salute you.

I suspect you're a girl, and if you are, then have you considered the possibility that you may actually have PMS.

There is research, I read something a while back and can't quote the source, that suggests that low blood sugar is what triggers the anger and that eating complex carbohydrate every three hours or so helps stabilise it. It's worth a try anyway.

Reply 8

Whizz

1

Anger. Management. Classes.

Or take up boxing - that way you can legitimately fight people.

Reply 9

MNBStyle

9

Sports
Relaxation techniques
Taking your mind off the anger
Anger management books theres plenty of good ones around

Reply 10

e11even

10

I personally find swimming very therapeutic. Or a jacuzzi for that matter :smile:

Reply 11

pumpkin7

OP

13

Zymoen

Pumpkin

To even acknowledge that something like this is a problem must have taken a degree of courage, and for that I salute you.

I suspect you're a girl, and if you are, then have you considered the possibility that you may actually have PMS.

There is research, I read something a while back and can't quote the source, that suggests that low blood sugar is what triggers the anger and that eating complex carbohydrate every three hours or so helps stabilise it. It's worth a try anyway.

yeah i'm female.. i wonder where the little sex icons have gone? :frown:

pms has come up before.. i get really moody just before my period, and that is usually when the problems start.. same time every month. but more and more now the anger is flaring up at all times of the month and it's going to lead to me being very much on my own.

i don't know if it will help but i have just ordered a book off amazon... http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/0965172902/qid=1138754986/sr=8-2/ref=pd_ka_2/203-4553266-3476713

anymore help would be appreciated :smile:

Reply 12

MNBStyle

9

pumpkin7

yeah i'm female.. i wonder where the little sex icons have gone? :frown:

pms has come up before.. i get really moody just before my period, and that is usually when the problems start.. same time every month. but more and more now the anger is flaring up at all times of the month and it's going to lead to me being very much on my own.

i don't know if it will help but i have just ordered a book off amazon... http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/0965172902/qid=1138754986/sr=8-2/ref=pd_ka_2/203-4553266-3476713

anymore help would be appreciated :smile:

Yeah thats a good choice of book