Turn on thread page Beta
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    A young man was lost wandering in a forest, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by an ancient Chinese man with a long, grey beard. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the Chinese man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese tortures known to man."

    "Ok," said the man, thinking that the daughter must be pretty old as well, and entered the house.

    Before dinner, the daughter came down the stairs. She was young,beautiful, and had a fantastic figure. She was obviously attracted to the young man since she couldn't keep her eyes off him during the meal. Remembering the old man's warning, he ignored her and went up to bed alone. But during he night, he could bear it no longer, and sneaked into her room for a night of passion. He was careful to keep everything quiet so the old man wouldn't hear. Near dawn he crept back to his room, exhausted, but happy.

    He woke to feel a pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes he saw a large rock on his chest with a note on it that read, "Chinese Torture 1: Large rock on chest." "Well, that's pretty crappy," he thought. "If that's the best the old man can do then I don't have much to worry about." He picked the boulder up, walked over to the window and threw the boulder out. As he did so he noticed another note on it that read: "Chinese Torture 2: Rock tied to left testicle." In a panic he glanced down and saw the rope that was already getting close to the end. Figuring that a few broken bones was better than castration, he jumped out of the window after the boulder. As he plummeted downward he saw a large sign on the ground that read, "Chinese Torture 3: Right testicle tied to bedpost."

    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    I want to see it. I want to see two seperate ropes tied to each of a man's testicles. Otherwise, I'm skeptical about the authenticity of these tortures.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    i swear the tortures are nonsence! He is bespattering Chinese.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    If two ropes are tied round your testicles, I think you'd notice.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Maybe his balls were numb from the night before so he couldn't feel the ropes.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    ROPES though. Not string, or thread... ropes. And not just one rope around the entire scrotal sack - two ropes!

    Never mind whether or not the guy would notice, I'm saying it's clearly not physically possible! To prove my point, tomorrow I'm going to go and buy some rope, and attempt to tie it round my left testicle. I'll set up a webcam so you can all see the attempt, and its inevitable failure.
 
 
 
Poll
Black Friday: Yay or Nay?
Useful resources
AtCTs

Ask the Community Team

Got a question about the site content or our moderation? Ask here.

Welcome Lounge

Welcome Lounge

We're a friendly bunch. Post here if you're new to TSR.

Groups associated with this forum:

View associated groups

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.