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Long distance relationship...again...

Does anyone here at all find having a long distance relationship painfully hard as in u dread the day ur bf/gf goes back to uni and just miss them soooo much u cant express it? :frown:

Do u then find that this makes u act silly when u actually do get to spend time together and u have silly massive args? Even tho theyre so lovely and amazing and stick by u throughout?

Advice/sympathy :frown:

very greatly appreciated

xxx

Reply 1

sweetface.

Long Distance relationships suck, i have been in one and it did not work. The guy was a real jerk. He said he cared about me, when really he did not. He lived a double life. He had a another girl when he was dating me. When i found out i was so upset.

From my experiance they don't work out. So why don't you find some guy that lives near you at least you know that they will always be there for you. Instead of having a guy that you are not 100% sure of what they are doing and being worried about it all the time. When you can go out with some one who will always care about you.

Reply 2

Monkey_Maiden

11

I was in one till a month ago, I was the same, I hated my bf leaving or me coming back to uni and slowly the pressure got to him, I was always upset and bickered about everything just beacuse I was so insecure he didnt love me or wanted out. He dumped me and have now realised they probably dont work, best finding somewhere at uni or closer to home

Reply 3

Scarlett_Jewel

1

I have a habit of ending up with 2 separate lives: one in the week and one at the weekend, when I'm with my boyfriend.

Both of my serious relationships have been long distance, and to be honest, if they weren't, i would have ended up being thrown out of uni for doing nothing. My excuse would have been 'lying in bed, hugging', or something. So whilst I'm always going to miss my boyfriend when I'm not around him, there's always going to be
1) the ongoing effort to be productive in each others' presence which has never worked
2) the slight feeling of relief when I'm back on that train and back to being able to 'do' things.

I guess you could relate it to being drunk. For a whole weekend. Every weekend [ :biggrin:

]

But then, don't most people do that when they leave uni and get a job?

Reply 4

Silly woo

OP

There's no denying that my relationship is worth it - he means the world to me.

I wish that i didnt behave really silly when im with him tho cos its only cos i miss him so much when hes away. Any advice on ways to stop myself picking silly args?

xxx

Reply 5

shinyhappy

14

awww *hugs* yes, they suck sometimes. Still, nice long summer holidays to be spent together :smile:

and easter coming up in the meantime.
The only way to stop yourself picking silly fights is, well - to think about what you're saying before you do. personally, I've found it quite hurtful when my boyfriend comes back from uni for a weekend (I'm in sixth form) and spends an entire day with one of his female friends... I don't know if you're in a similar situation (i.e. being slightly possesive of the time you do get to spend with him) but I've now realised that it totally isn't worth it. I think that in a way, having arguments about stupid things like that was just a way to stop myself missing him so much...
Hope it all works out well for you anyway :smile:

xxx
PM me if you want to chat, btw :smile:

Reply 6

Silly woo

OP

Thanks shinyhappy

i pmd u

xxx

Reply 7

Silly woo

OP

Has anyone got any tips as to how to make long distance easier? As in which way is the best way of communication etc...

Any advice greatly appreciated,

xxx

Reply 8

keyka

I've been with my boyfriend for 19 months today (woo!), and he goes to uni 200 miles away, so i generally get to see him for a weekend once a month, because were both poor students and cant afford £30 train tickets every week.

I would recommend making sure you talk lots on the phone during the time you are apart, and the odd cute email or text always goes down well. when you are together make the most of it- yes spend a day snuggled up on your sofa but also do something slightly different, like go to the beach with some mutal friends (or non mutal ones so you get to know them and when he wants to spend a day with his female friend then you can go along too), go to your local art gallery, or get on the first train that arrives at the station and see where it will be in 1/2/3 hrs time and spend a day there!

Getting to know each others friends really does help- it eases jealosy issues, and gives you a whole new group of friends with the potential to set-up with your friends!

Reply 9

wednesburywench

2

you can't be jelous in a ldr, it simply just wouldn't work. The trust has to be there, and altho hard to get used to at the start, it will get there eventually. I found it hard to be away from my boyfriend because we have grown up together (been together since we were 15) but I am used to it now, and although hard i love the time i do spend with him, and I still feel a total part of his life because we speak every day and i know everything he is doing because he lets me know everything. It is special to find someone so right you can bear it though, but I know we are just amazing together, because we both have trust in each other, and talk all the time, and when we do see each other, i am just so grateful for him being there that I wouldn't argue with him. In the first time we did have a few small disagreements, but that is natural because you have to get used to them leading a different life from what you are used to. For me it was hard to come to terms with not being such a big part in his life, but i soon realised of course I was, and I was being silly. I have felt much more positive with it this term, altho missed him more than ever! I also feel it has brought us closer than ever, and it basically has prooved to us that we are so great together, that we can last being 100 miles apart, even after 3 yrs of being together every day!

Long distance relationship...again...

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