This discussion is now closed.

Check out other Related discussions

On a 'break' is going with someone else acceptable or cheating?

#circa (1999) Ross+rachel, friends .

Personally, I think if the one who calls for the break goes with someone else its cheating, but the if the person who didnt really want the break goes with someone else - its acceptable.

Reply 1

Angelil

19

My opinion? I think that if you feel attracted to someone else while 'on a break' and it isn't just lust (e.g. one night stand with random from a club) then it's probably a sign that you shouldn't get back together anyway. A 'break' is usually code for delaying the official breakup.

Reply 2

friendlyneutron

11

Well, it certainly won't help the chances of the couple getting back together!

Reply 3

Segat1

16

never understood the point of being on a break. you either break up, or you don't. stupid friends episode

Reply 4

completely random

8

I can understand the concept of a break, having done it with my boyfriend. I wanted to take a break because I was messed up with depression etc and it wasn't fair on him to put up with it, so I suggested a break to give us some time out and when I was a bit more stable then we'd try again. We were still 'together' but not seeing each other physically/contacting etc. If he had gone off with someone else during that time I would have been upset and angry but I would have understood why; for me to go off with someone would have been out of the question. Maybe you need to understand and clarify the reasons you're taking the break for 'cheating' to be acceptable, if indeed such a thing can be deemed acceptable at all. Are you splitting temporarily with a view to getting back together in the future (which would hence mean seeing other people?) or are you taking some time out while still in a relationship? It can work in rare circumstances- it did for me, but I can understand why people don't believe in it. Talk about a minefield :-) see Friends season 3!

Reply 5

wednesburywench

2

I think if you do that then you know you shouldn't get back together. A break is all about sorting out in your mind what you really want. Sometimes minds can mess you up and you might not know what you want until you realise how much u miss it. What I dont understand is people that go on a break just to meet up every day and txt constantly. A break for me would be no contact for a week or so, see how you both cope without each other.

Reply 6

Fleece

15

i think this is something you should have discussed when you agreed to go on a break...

Reply 7

Drogue

19

Clearly if you're on a break, the point is it's a break from the relationship. Hence you're not together. If you're not attached, you can't cheat. If you can't go with other people, what makes it a break? Now, if you agree that you're going to break for a bit but not see other people, then that's different, but without the agreement that you'll remain single, a break is a break.

Reply 8

xXMessedUpXx

15

if you're on a break, then so what? as has been said you're not toegther so why not? when it happened to me i wasn't aware it was a "break" as such as my bf had said that the splitting up was a definite thing. so i went out and pulled. But we then got back together, yet i don't consider that cheating under the circumstances

Reply 9

Tarts_n_Vicars

13

Yeah but if you had wanted to break up then you would have broken up. A break (to me!) implies that you have some personal stuff going on and for whatever reason you don't want your partner around for it so you take a "break". I can understand why the partner might go off with someone else...but I'd be gutted if they did (speaking from personal experience!!).

I do think it's kind of a weird thing to do, but I've done it when I didn't want to break up with a bf but couldn't handle stuff that was going on with us. He met someone else which I suppose proved we weren't meant to be together in the long run.

Now I just have Scotto for company lol. I hope this thread wasn't directed at me matey!

Reply 10

xXMessedUpXx

15

We did break up..

He split up with me, and when i asked "is this a perment thing, or do you seeing us getting back together?" his answer was "yes its perment and no i don't". But the fact we got back together after a month, makes it seem more liek a break to me..

Reply 11

Tarts_n_Vicars

13

Soz was referring to Drogue's post not yours....didn't see your one :redface:

I agree with you about it not being cheating if you're properly broken up - in my case we were on a "break" lol

to the op, no.

I think that if you are on a break and WANT to "go with" other people then you should seriously consider if your relationship is worth recovering.

Reply 14

Né Stig

15

^ Precisely. Otheriwse I would of thought it would classify as 'cheating'.
I would be none to pleased, and a pleasant goodbye would be awaiting the partner upon returning to communicate.

Reply 15

Biffy Clyro

12

I hate the whole concept of breaks.

It usually just ends up getting someone hurt. Especially because of the vague defintion of what a break is!

If I went on a break with my girlfriend and something happened with her and a guy then I would be absolutly gutted.

I find it hard to understand how people can even consider something happening with someone else without making their intentions clear with their (ex) girlfriend/boyfriend as its just so harsh!

Reply 16

silence

16

Biffy Clyro

I hate the whole concept of breaks.

It usually just ends up getting someone hurt.

i find that to be a synonym for emotional death, gradual shattering and destruction of one's soul, leaving that individual to be tossed around in a sea of nothingness.

On a 'break' is going with someone else acceptable or cheating?

Related discussions

Articles for you