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Dyslexic boyfriend

I've been going out with my bf for over 6 months now, and I really love him. He says he loves me too. So far its been going great, most of the time. The thing is, he's severely dyslexic. At first I though it was just his spelling that was affected, but it affects the way he interacts with people a lot too. Sometimes we find it hard to communicate, as he doesn't always express his thoughts and emotions very well, and gets angry with me. I try to be undersatnding and I don't want it to split us up - we're so good together most of the time. But sometimes, I think I just can't cope.

Is anyone else in this situation? How do you deal with it? What should I do?

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

Sorry to sound ignorant, but I thought dyslexia only affected your writing and reading?

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

No, it can affect spoken language, short term memory, and can affect behavior towards others too. Which is why i find it so difficult sometimes

Reply 3

Anonymous #3

Anonymous

Sorry to sound ignorant, but I thought dyslexia only affected your writing and reading?

that seems to be the common diagnostic criteria for dyslexia, yeah.
but it's a neurodevelopmental disorder - so incidences of other symptoms/co-morbid disorders e.g. ADHD etc. can be quite common too.

interaction with people problems sounds more like a co-morbid condition though - something on the Autistic/Asperger's spectrum perhaps.
unless it's directly verbal language ability based..?

to the OP - has he been properly diagnosed & assessed? & any helpful suggestions for educational psychologists / occupational therapists / neurologists etc?

otherwise, i guess it's just one of those take it or leave it personality features as with anyone. so you need to decide if the + outweighs the - as with any relationship.
being understanding = obviously good.. have you tried talking to him about how difficult you find it sometimes? or maybe his friends/family & see how they cope..? good luck. :smile:

Reply 4

The Albatross

12

http://www.interdys.org/fact%20sheets/Soc-Emo%20FS%20N.pdf

explains a lot

Reply 5

FireDeuce

14

I'm sure he doesn't mean to get angry with you.
You see it in extremely intelligent toddlers/small children aswel, they can't read the word fast enough because their brain won't let them, or they can't say the sentence fast enough, so they'll throw the book and hit the person they are trying to talk to.

If he says he loves you, believe him, and if you love him, just love him no matter what.

Reply 6

TrentEnd

2

Just pray he's not a devil worshipper - he'll probably try and sell his soul to Santa....

Reply 7

Brummie Yoshi

Or he might struggle to take your bar off!!

In all seriousness, its possibly just frustration that he can't express what he's thinking the way he wants.

Reply 8

sweetface.

There's nothing wrong with being a dyslexic i have dyslexia, and to be honest it only truely effects learning. It has nothing to do with the way i comunicate with people. I am normal, all i have is this one speical gift of dyslexia.

I know i am my typing and spelling looks perfect but i still have to go back and check sometimes. But it has taken me years to really understand how to type without mistakes.

Well anyway, i think you should just reasearch. Dylexic people like me can be very intelligent and very creative.

Anyway you should not be looking at what learning disablity your boyfirend has, you should be looking at him as a person and not just becuase he's dyslexic. You have been with him so long why are you worring?

And you say he's sometimes mad, why don't you try and talk to him about his feelings.

I hope everything works out :smile:

Reply 9

Katia

6

Those two who just took the piss, you're well rank. You shouldn't be so ignorant about such an irritating and frustrating disorder to which no one has a 'cure' for. Grr. Rant over.
--------
To the OP, talk to him about it. Say how much you love him and how you love him for who he is, but you just wish he didn't get angry at you etc. :smile:

Reply 10

Brummie Yoshi

Katia

Those two who just took the piss, you're well rank. You shouldn't be so ignorant about such an irritating and frustrating disorder to which no one has a 'cure' for. Grr. Rant over.
--------
To the OP, talk to him about it. Say how much you love him and how you love him for who he is, but you just wish he didn't get angry at you etc. :smile:

in fairness i have Dyspraxia (see can't even spell it lol) so it felt like it an inside joke. no offense intended.

Reply 11

Eccentric Man

8

Well, l have a physical disability and l hate the idea that it should get remotely in the way of love, but at the end of the day l know it can, i even was once rejected by a girl in a wheelchair coz i spasmed to much!

Anyway, what l'm trying to say is it can be hard falling in love with someone with a disability, but you have to try to look past that. Believe me, sometimes l do wonder myself if l would be put off a girl if she had similar issues to me

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

OP

Lyndzxx

There's nothing wrong with being a dyslexic i have dyslexia, and to be honest it only truely effects learning. It has nothing to do with the way i comunicate with people. I am normal, all i have is this one speical gift of dyslexia.

no, of course there's nothing wrong with it! he is a really clever guy an other aspects - like he's REALLY good at science. Nad no not everyone is affected emotionlly and socially - you are lucky not to be, but he is.

Lyndzxx

I know i am my typing and spelling looks perfect but i still have to go back and check sometimes. But it has taken me years to really understand how to type without mistakes.

he is much worse than that. he has to use a spell checker for everything. sometimes i correct things for him, but he really can't.

Lyndzxx

Well anyway, i think you should just reasearch. Dylexic people like me can be very intelligent and very creative.

i have done a lot of research. this is how i know that it can affect his communtication and expressing of emotions. at first i thought he was just insensitive, but now i know its not that. and yes, he is very intelligent.

Lyndzxx

Anyway you should not be looking at what learning disablity your boyfirend has, you should be looking at him as a person and not just becuase he's dyslexic. You have been with him so long why are you worring?

becuse it gets me down. and of course i can see beyond the fact that he has dyslexia. he's lovely and kind as a person, its just atht the way he is does have an effect on our relationship

Lyndzxx

And you say he's sometimes mad, why don't you try and talk to him about his feelings.

of course i do! but he finds it hard to express them.

Lyndzxx

I hope everything works out :smile:

thanks xxx

Reply 13

Anonymous #4

Eccentric Man

Well, l have a physical disability and l hate the idea that it should get remotely in the way of love, but at the end of the day l know it can, i even was once rejected by a girl in a wheelchair coz i spasmed to much!

Anyway, what l'm trying to say is it can be hard falling in love with someone with a disability, but you have to try to look past that. Believe me, sometimes l do wonder myself if l would be put off a girl if she had similar issues to me