Have you had a bad counselling experience? Watch

username418231
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#81
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Look at me still watching this thread :ninja:


(Original post by Zosie)
I went for an initial appointment, that I had to pay for. After half the time, the counsellor said she didn't think I'd benefit from counselling, as there didn't seem to be a traumatic event in my life that had started my depression/anxiety (despite the fact the previous sessions I'd at at uni had been really helpful.)

I left feeling worse than ever, and it took seven months and a massive breakdown to make myself go back. Even now, it makes it very difficult for me to open up to my new counsellor because I worry they're thinking I don't need it too.
I sometimes feel the same way

I've had great counselling experiences, but when I started to consider having counselling my mentor indicated that there would be no point. Same with when I suggested speaking to a GP.

Then she stupidly went ahead and started trivialising my issues, as though I had no right to talk about them as though they are not serious :mad: Like I had no right to complain, so sometimes I can't help but lose courage to open up in case I am ignored or told me problems are not "serious enough".


(Original post by King Kebab)
No. All of my counseling experiences have been worthwhile. I can say with confidence that I would not be alive just now if it were not for the counseling I received. Many of them truly are a credit to their profession and they should be held in higher regard by society in general.
Same here.

(Original post by Anonymous)
I had a counsellor who I felt was mocking me. They would always laugh when I got distressed and ended up in spiralling though patterns and it was not helpful at all. I spent every session crying and arguing furiously with them.
Same here :mad:
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Anonymous #11
#82
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Severe bulimia, depression and had periods of anorexia. Was normal weight at this point, but had lost a lot of weight very rapidly, was obsessed with losing more weight and wanted to become as thin as possible.

Nurse counsellor: "Everybody worries about their weight. Even me! Clothes sizes don't matter. If I go into M&S, my size is different from H&M."

Me: *no ****, I'd kind of realised this*

Nurse: "And then the anorexics I'm seeing complain because they're a size 8 instead of size 6 now. Ha ha, how silly is that?"

Me: *thanks. I want to be smaller than size 6 too*

That ***** was so patronising and made me mistrust ED professionals for years and made me very reluctant to engage in recovery. That's quite tragic given that I've been severely EDed for 10 years and the effect it's had on my life.

----
After several weeks of therapy, was struggling to make progress, terrified of keeping food down, terrified of gaining weight etc

Private therapist: "Your case of bulimia is the worst I've ever seen. I don't think I can help you. Maybe your should consider going to an inpatient clinic?"

That was soul destroying. Whether or not she is right, it was crushing to hear and it made me lose hope that I can ever get better and left me very depressed.
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Anonymous #11
#83
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#83
Told a psychiatrist I felt suicidal and would kill myself if I got kicked out of medical school.

Psychiatrist: *laughs* "Ha ha, you want to be a doctor that badly?"
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username418231
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Told a psychiatrist I felt suicidal and would kill myself if I got kicked out of medical school.

Psychiatrist: *laughs* "Ha ha, you want to be a doctor that badly?"
:O
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Mo0nlixht3via
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#85
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Just to give a bit of context here I have only ever seen one councillor, the school one after my self harm cuts were noticed by a teacher and I had a breakdown at school. I was in an awful place; I had been caught shoplifting and nearly sent to juvi (so my parents were in a state), I had just stopped being proana as I was too scared that my parents would notice cause they were on hyper-alert, I was self harming at least once a day (both at home and in school) and honestly I just wanted to end it all and be done with it at that point. My entire world had come crashing down within a few months with seemingly no catalyst at all.

When my cuts were spotted and I was patched up, there was a definite part of me which was relieved that someone would help me through this (partly because I knew one was infected) and try to help me understand why my life had gone in this direction. I was referred to the school councillor. When I arrived for my first appointment, I didn't really know how to express my feelings as then I really didn't feel anything at all (I am pretty sure I was quite depressed). I listed off the various different things I had done in a detached way and immediately it felt like she was trying to push me into a neat little labelled corner. I had another session following the first which was much like the first and then my last one only lasted 5 minutes (so I got the 3 sessions I was entitled to) and she asked me if I really wanted to stop. I replied "I don't know" because I was getting frustrated at not seeming to be taken seriously. My friends all did it and it wasn't a problem for them, so what did it matter? I had stopped caring altogether and all I really wanted was for her to tell me that it wasn't right and I shouldn't feel the need to had to do that to myself because I didn't deserve it. Instead, she dismissed my problems telling me that because I wasn't a serious enough case and she wanted to cut down on her working hours, I shouldn't bother to come back.

This happened in year 9, I am now year 12 (3 years ago) and most of my issues are still here. I am a lot better at hiding. I self harmed in the middle of a GCSE exam and nobody noticed. I want help but I'm too anxious to go to the doctors to try and get a cahms referral and thanks to that councillor the thoughts that always plays in the back of my own head dismisses my feelings and issues too.
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E_M_M_I_E
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(Original post by briesandwich)
Ah..I remember when I had my first therapist for anorexia, and I had expressed to her how I felt huge - even though I was only a size 8. Her reply was "Well, I'm a size 14, am I fat to you?" I said no but felt like I had really offended her. I left feeling very guilty.
Didn't want to bump this thread but bless her :-( I hope you're both okay, no need to feel guilty, she knows it's not your fault.
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E_M_M_I_E
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Told a psychiatrist I felt suicidal and would kill myself if I got kicked out of medical school.

Psychiatrist: *laughs* "Ha ha, you want to be a doctor that badly?"
This is how I'd talk to my best friend who I'd then proceed to help, but then again we both use humour to cope with our illness. Yours just seems downright patronising.
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E_M_M_I_E
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(Original post by Mo0nlixht3via)
Just to give a bit of context here I have only ever seen one councillor, the school one after my self harm cuts were noticed by a teacher and I had a breakdown at school. I was in an awful place; I had been caught shoplifting and nearly sent to juvi (so my parents were in a state), I had just stopped being proana as I was too scared that my parents would notice cause they were on hyper-alert, I was self harming at least once a day (both at home and in school) and honestly I just wanted to end it all and be done with it at that point. My entire world had come crashing down within a few months with seemingly no catalyst at all.

When my cuts were spotted and I was patched up, there was a definite part of me which was relieved that someone would help me through this (partly because I knew one was infected) and try to help me understand why my life had gone in this direction. I was referred to the school councillor. When I arrived for my first appointment, I didn't really know how to express my feelings as then I really didn't feel anything at all (I am pretty sure I was quite depressed). I listed off the various different things I had done in a detached way and immediately it felt like she was trying to push me into a neat little labelled corner. I had another session following the first which was much like the first and then my last one only lasted 5 minutes (so I got the 3 sessions I was entitled to) and she asked me if I really wanted to stop. I replied "I don't know" because I was getting frustrated at not seeming to be taken seriously. My friends all did it and it wasn't a problem for them, so what did it matter? I had stopped caring altogether and all I really wanted was for her to tell me that it wasn't right and I shouldn't feel the need to had to do that to myself because I didn't deserve it. Instead, she dismissed my problems telling me that because I wasn't a serious enough case and she wanted to cut down on her working hours, I shouldn't bother to come back.

This happened in year 9, I am now year 12 (3 years ago) and most of my issues are still here. I am a lot better at hiding. I self harmed in the middle of a GCSE exam and nobody noticed. I want help but I'm too anxious to go to the doctors to try and get a cahms referral and thanks to that councillor the thoughts that always plays in the back of my own head dismisses my feelings and issues too.
If you still use this site, please feel free to message me.

It's strange how 2012 was 5 years ago, man time flies.

I read the entire thing and I deeply relate. I'm also in Year 12.
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Magdatrix >_<
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The main (recurring) issue I have had is the limited number of sessions you are "allowed" to have - most recently, I had a bunch of 4 sessions which I had to complete before a subsequent referral....I was kept waiting 7 weeks between the third and fourth session, to then be told I then had to start a 12-16 week wait for the next stage...Really don't know why that referral couldn't have been done earlier.
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Frinklefata
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#90
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I think counselling for me does more harm that good. She never told me anything I couldn’t work out for myself. Had no comprehension of how to solve issues I have not thought of before. Was always watching the clock and wrapped up sessions 10 minutes before the end of the 1 hour session. Didn’t grasp depression. I felt more of a failure and distressed after sessions than beforehand. Never again! It’s a business, that’s it. Exploiting vulnerable people who are desparate to try anything. Best thing I did was stopping the counselling after 5 sessions. I didn’t want to go to my last session so cancelled. Work paid for it. The only thing it taught me was no more of tick boxing what work thinks I should do and listening to my gut feeling and saying no to it.
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Anonymous #12
#91
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#91
I had self esteem issues and had a difficult time accepting my appearance and body. My counsellor despite knowing this and knowing how emotional i got about the topic, still ended focusing more on the relationship between myself an my mother even though that wasnt a primary concern of mine. One session that I did manage to talk about how I feel about my appearance, she wanted to know why I feel that way. She went on about how both my mum and my stepmum are quite pretty and I agreed and there was an awkward silence suggesting that there's something wrong with my appearance. She changed the subject after that. I cried on the way home from that session.
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mwingereza
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#92
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ulekY-H0G4g
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CrystallEyes
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#93
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I wouldn't touch them with a bargepole. Having head my head battered causing a subdural haematoma and a partially decapitated ear and resulting partial deafness in one ear and tinnitus the counsellor then asked about my sexual orientation and, if I was heterosexual as I claimed, did I consider myself attractive to women? A psychologist later dismissed any notion that I was suffering from PTSD despite my claims of being on edge after the assault, nightmare and anxiety attacks that lasted for many years and still occur to this day. Driving bans and the deafness also precluded me from jobs in transport and military service. I was then given a hard time at hearing regarding criminal injuries compensation and initially refused which led to more depression and that feeling of having lost as the panel were inclined to take the expert (psychologist) advice. I got compensation in the end but it was a hard lesson in avoiding counselling.

Cheers, S.
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Anonymous #13
#94
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#94
I suppose it depends on the counsellor. When I saw the school counsellor it didn’t go well but out of school counselling was much better for me
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Anonymous #14
#95
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I had a counsellor who made me feel constantly patronised and wanted to talk about major events in my life such as my parents divorce rather than what was stressing me at that moment, which only made things worse
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Hurting
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#96
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I have experienced the best and worst . Is this regulated . Like GP , money for payment ranges from £30 To ! Lots working in unregulated premises . Lots of government regs.to catch up on. Meanwhile I am stil hurting .
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