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why isnt he speaking to me?

i met this gorgeous guy about a year and a half ago.we got on really well, but he seems really shy. the first time we met, we ended up talking for like, an hour at a party then we left without exchanging numbers. the next time, at another party, my drunk friend went up to us and said i really fancied him (true). he got really embarrassed and wouldnt talk to me, and left the party early.the enxt party i saw him at, we did arrage to meet up and did exchange numbers. but then he cancelled on the day we were meant to meet. we had discussed being dating etc but the same thing happened the next couple of times - making then breaking the date. then he said he'd call me ver the summer hols but he didnt. when he got back, we went clubbing with our mates, but he asked me if i had got with anyone else iover the summer. i said YES, even tho i hadnt, cos i thought he had no right to be possessive if he cant even meet up with me. he said he had too, but then we both admitted we werelying.

then i found out he had last year had a massive major crush on this girl who did sleep her way round the campus. he did try dating her, but she had a bf. there was a rumor that he had slept with her when they wre drunk, but they both say it is untrue. also, that he was always calling her.he never returns my calls and hardly speaks to me when i do call.she had a bf and they are still together, and she says she hates my guy cos he was stalking her anyway, when i found out about this girl, he denied all of it and was really embarrassed but then he tried to blame me that i found it out, and said he'd never speak to me again.

i caled him xmas eve and we made up, and we spoke a couple of times since. i know he was embarrassed that i found out abnout this girl, so i told him i was still a virgin and didnt want sex before marriage. this was in case me and him ever did get together, so he knows right off, and secondly, the reason i told him, so that he knew something potentially embarrassing about my private life too so we are equal.

now he wont take any of my calls and isnt talking to me since. any ideas why this is?

sorry bout the long post and any help much appecaited. rep will be given cos i just cant figure it out

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Reply 20

phantom

Anonymous

also he is the same religion as me.

just because hes the same religion as you doesnt mean he has the same views on sex before marriage. maybe you did freak him out a bit when you told him that you didnt believe in sex before marriage first off you werent even dating and secondly thats quite personal information.
i know you really like him but to be honest from what you've put i dont understand why, he is treating you badly and although you may think there is a good reason (which perhaps there is) you have to be open to the fact that perhaps he just doesnt like you. are you sure you were friends to begin with? from what i can gather you had only seen each other at parties and he may not want a relationship if he doesnt know you that well.
you should leave him and if he wants to know you then i guess he will call and if he doesnt then you are better off without him. it may be hard but do you really want to waste your time on someone that doesnt want you?

Reply 21

Mark S

Because he's a tw**?

Reply 22

Anonymous #1

lol omg our christian union has 4 members. im one of them.

i think its one of 2 things.
1. that info was too personal and he is embarrassed or
2. he was considering a relationship but now isnt

i mean we had discussed dating in the past, but both with me and the girl he stalked (btw this was before he had discussed dating me) he cancelled dates at the last minute.

actually i think its 1.
i guess all i can do is ignore him for a while. im just so hurt that after sharing somwething so personal that he would just ignore me.

Reply 23

deaks

Its cos 1 u came on way to strong and prob scared him off and also who wants to go out with a girl who doesnt believe in sex before marriage? Certainly not me!

Reply 24

Helenia

Anonymous

do you understand the reason? if so , please tell me as i have no idea. i thought we were friends so i dont get how my lack of having sex is a reason not to speak to me.

if i ignore him will he like me more?

No, I don't understand the reason, I'm just saying he probably has one, however bad it may seem to you. He won't like you more if you ignore him, but you need to do it because the more you try, if he doesn't want to speak to you, the harder he'll resist and it'll get even more nasty. Just let him go, it doesn't sound like he deserves your time, and if the sex thing really is an issue it's clear that you wouldn't be compatible.

Reply 25

Anonymous #1

i hope its not an issue.
i really think he is just embarassed.

i would like to marry him one day

Reply 26

high priestess fnord

Anonymous

i would like to marry him one day

okay do u not think u mite need a little more info b4 even thinking something like that? we r young and its far more fun being free than being tied down in a serious relationship. dont u want to experience more? not to mention that u dont know the guy that well.

deaks

Its cos 1 u came on way to strong and prob scared him off and also who wants to go out with a girl who doesnt believe in sex before marriage? Certainly not me!

unfortunately i also agree with deaks mariage isnt an attractive idea to most young men and neither is the idea of curtailing their sex lives.

Reply 27

RaniBee

luv, its pretty obvious this guy wanted one thing, since you sorted it before xmas, then when you tell him your a virgin he doesn't want to know. Just forget him, he doesn't seem worth the hassle as a friend or even more, you don't need someone whose messing you about. be strong and ditch the prat!

Reply 28

Helenia

Anonymous

i hope its not an issue.
i really think he is just embarassed.

i would like to marry him one day

Why? He's treated you badly right from the outset. This is NOT someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, if they're going to be petty and overreact when you say something like that. It's fairly clear there is no compatibility.

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