The Student Room Group

My girlfriend asks me for permission to go pee.

I like, like many people, am working hard at exams. My girlfriend of three years does the same course as me and is working just as hard. We've been spending a lot of time together doing revision and getting ready for the final exam tomorrow. Because of this excess of time together I noticed something- whenever she wants to go to the toilet, have a drink, eat something etc she asks me if she can do whatever. She then turns her head to me and looks at me expectantly.

I've never forbid her from going to pee, nor do I control her, so I thought this was quite a curious development. I asked her why she was doing it and she just giggled and said she didn't know. I'll note, this doesn't just happen when we're revising together, it happens when we're sitting casually together relaxing between revision sessions.

Does anyone else have any experience with this? Is it a politeness thing? A submissive thing? Some natural progression of long term relationships?

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Reply 1
Next time she asks to use the bathroom, say no, and watch her struggle with her natural needs and her submissive nature. A social experiment of the 21st century.
:absinth:

Maybe she's just joking lol?

I doubt she's being serious.

I think, one time you should just say "NO!" and see what happens.
Reply 3
It took me until about 2 years into my relationship before i stopped asking, and thats only because he kept telling me to stop lol.

It is totally a politeness thing, like if your at someone elses house, regardless of who it is I would ask before doing anything.

He still doesn't understand why i knock before I come in the house either lol.
Reply 4
Original post by alistaircook
:absinth:

Maybe she's just joking lol?

I doubt she's being serious.

I think, one time you should just say "NO!" and see what happens.


She will be being serious, we do that sort of thing.
Reply 5
Original post by TheApex
Next time she asks to use the bathroom, say no, and watch her struggle with her natural needs and her submissive nature. A social experiment of the 21st century.


I tried it. She looked from side to side confused and then looked at me again. Then when I said she could go she gave an exasperated groan and walked off smiling at me.

If I can catch her in the 20 minutes since I posted this she must have a bladder the size of a walnut.

Janey142
It took me until about 2 years into my relationship before i stopped asking, and thats only because he kept telling me to stop lol.


If she wants to do it I'm not going to stop her. But thanks for saying she's not the only one.
Reply 6
Original post by TheApex
Next time she asks to use the bathroom, say no, and watch her struggle with her natural needs and her submissive nature. A social experiment of the 21st century.



Original post by Anonymous
I like, like many people, am working hard at exams. My girlfriend of three years does the same course as me and is working just as hard. We've been spending a lot of time together doing revision and getting ready for the final exam tomorrow. Because of this excess of time together I noticed something- whenever she wants to go to the toilet, have a drink, eat something etc she asks me if she can do whatever. She then turns her head to me and looks at me expectantly.

I've never forbid her from going to pee, nor do I control her, so I thought this was quite a curious development. I asked her why she was doing it and she just giggled and said she didn't know. I'll note, this doesn't just happen when we're revising together, it happens when we're sitting casually together relaxing between revision sessions.

Does anyone else have any experience with this? Is it a politeness thing? A submissive thing? Some natural progression of long term relationships?


Oh the fun to be had with these 2 posts!


Personally I'd turn her into my own porn queen but make sure she is a lady on the outside.
Reply 7
Wouldn't you be curious if she kept just wandering off randomly?
Reply 8
Original post by misst911
Wouldn't you be curious if she kept just wandering off randomly?


Perhaps, but wouldn't it be more normal to say "I'm just going to the toilet" rather than "Please may I go to the toilet?" We're not in primary school any more. I get the thing about it being someone else's house, and would always ask "Is it alright if I use your bathroom" the first time or two, but with a boyfriend of 3 years? That's odd.
Reply 9
Does she actually say "Can I got to the toilet please?" That doesn't make sense. I will always say "Just popping to the toilet" to my boyfriend and wait for him to respond, with a nod or an ok, just so i'm not walking off randomly.
Reply 10
My girlfriend does this and we've been together for almost a year. It doesn't bother me in all honesty if anything I find it somewhat cute.

I'm guessing it is to do with being polite but also submissive behaviour. If it doesn't bother you then leave it be and I'm sure in the long-run she'll stop asking of her own accord.
Original post by Anonymous
I like, like many people, am working hard at exams. My girlfriend of three years does the same course as me and is working just as hard. We've been spending a lot of time together doing revision and getting ready for the final exam tomorrow. Because of this excess of time together I noticed something- whenever she wants to go to the toilet, have a drink, eat something etc she asks me if she can do whatever. She then turns her head to me and looks at me expectantly.

I've never forbid her from going to pee, nor do I control her, so I thought this was quite a curious development. I asked her why she was doing it and she just giggled and said she didn't know. I'll note, this doesn't just happen when we're revising together, it happens when we're sitting casually together relaxing between revision sessions.

Does anyone else have any experience with this? Is it a politeness thing? A submissive thing? Some natural progression of long term relationships?


Um, I have never asked my boyfriend if I can go to the toilet unless we're in a pub I'm not familiar with and I ask him where the toilet is. Before we lived together when I was at his house I would ask him if I could have drink or something to eat because I was brought up to believe that as a guest it is not my place to just help myself and it is his job as a host to get it for me.
Reply 12
I don't find this strange, in fact, only recently have i stopped doing this in my three year relationship.

I used to say "Can I use your bathroom?" rather than "May I please go to the toilet?"

The former just sounds polite, the latter sounds like a child-like request.

It is just good manners. Although I no longer ask to use the bathroom, I would still never just help myself to drink or food (unless it was late at night.)
- "Can I have a drink please?"

I was just brought up to believe that you shouldn't take what isn't yours when you're in someone elses house, and should ask first.

That's not to say I'd expect my boyfriend to do it at my house. :tongue:
Original post by Anonymous
I tried it. She looked from side to side confused and then looked at me again. Then when I said she could go she gave an exasperated groan and walked off smiling at me.

If I can catch her in the 20 minutes since I posted this she must have a bladder the size of a walnut.



If she wants to do it I'm not going to stop her. But thanks for saying she's not the only one.


tbh it sounds like she's just playing
Reply 14
How odd. Obviously if you're at someone else's house, it's polite to ask if it's alright to use their bathroom - I even do that at my best mate's place, just because I'm stupidly polite, to the extent that people often say 'No' when I ask to do/get/borrow something just because they know I'll be like, 'Oh, ok then'!), and it's normal to say 'Just popping to the loo' so they don't just think you're wandering off, but if she does it when you're not at your house and she actually asks your permission to, literally, pee, rather than just ask if she can use your toilet, that's weird!
Reply 15
Original post by Helenia
Perhaps, but wouldn't it be more normal to say "I'm just going to the toilet" rather than "Please may I go to the toilet?" We're not in primary school any more. I get the thing about it being someone else's house, and would always ask "Is it alright if I use your bathroom" the first time or two, but with a boyfriend of 3 years? That's odd.


Oh it didn't realise it was literally that. Yeah that's odd.

I reckon make a joke of it, laugh and say you don't have to ask permission, and see if she takes the hint.
hmm i find it a little strange. I mean;

usually they'll say.. "Where is the toilet?" - that's pretty much as far as it would go.

Not "can I use the toilet?".. what if I say no? :smug:
Reply 17
Original post by Anonymous
I like, like many people, am working hard at exams. My girlfriend of three years does the same course as me and is working just as hard. We've been spending a lot of time together doing revision and getting ready for the final exam tomorrow. Because of this excess of time together I noticed something- whenever she wants to go to the toilet, have a drink, eat something etc she asks me if she can do whatever. She then turns her head to me and looks at me expectantly.

I've never forbid her from going to pee, nor do I control her, so I thought this was quite a curious development. I asked her why she was doing it and she just giggled and said she didn't know. I'll note, this doesn't just happen when we're revising together, it happens when we're sitting casually together relaxing between revision sessions.

Does anyone else have any experience with this? Is it a politeness thing? A submissive thing? Some natural progression of long term relationships?


She wants to be dominated by you sexually obviously
Could be for many reasons. Are you normally at yours when she asks? Maybe she doesn't want to assume she can take advantage of your facilities and is being polite. I do this when I'm not 100% sure where I stand with someone re: using their stuff without asking.

Maybe she was brought up to always ask for permission?

Maybe she's submissive and likes her partner to be in control?

Try having another chat with her about it - ask if it makes her happy to ask, if she is looking for reassurance, if she is unsure how you will react if she does something without asking, etc. You might need to probe a bit to find out her feelings. If you just ask why, she might shrug and say she doesn't know. Or, if it doesn't bother you, let her carry on.
is she mentally all there? sounds ****ed to me. #realtalk