GOGSoc Episode V: The GOG Strikes Back

Well, I'm not sure I would class it as 'silly', but he isn't minded the same way as I am, or many of the people on here. He's not an academic, and does particularly like to over analyse things, and the idea of power dynamics, historic or otherwise are me being silly and overanalysing. I think, to him, changing your name is somehow a symbol of love, commitment etc etc. I pointed out that it was actually a symbol of ownership that I didn't want to really subscribe to (just as I don't really want my dad to walk me down the aisle), but he just sees this as overthinking something that he sees as a 'nice tradition'. I questioned why, if it's such a sign of love or committment, he wouldn't take my name. 'That's not how it's done', apparently, and 'why do I always have to question everything'.

I wonder why we've been together so long, sometimes

Oh, and as for him going away and thinking about it - I think the whole argument (which took place almost three years ago now) was never really to do with changing names. If we want to overanalyse, it was also a lot to do with some insecurity and subsequent control issues that he had, which have been quietly eroded by me over the years. The same argument pops up frequently whenever I challenge anything in the status quo (eg. another frequent one is my veganism). It's just the way he is, and he has many other redeeming features, I can forgive the inability to engage in critical analysis or an engagement with feminist theory

Errrr...no!

Even if thought about critically, there is the issue that the guy taking the girl's name raises questions from people, precisely because it's unusual. Were it not for social stigma I'd have had no issue taking Helen's name, but I'd rather not open myself to that many comments, jokes and assumptions from people.

It's such a hard problem in modern times. I'm no fan of double-barrelled surnames, and that gets worse a generation later as going triple- or quadruple-barrelled seems pretty silly. Keeping separate names presents the problem of which the kids take, and somehow it seems like less of a family if you have different surnames. Which leaves two options that I'd have been ok with: the girl takes the guys name (tradition making it common enough not to lead to assumptions) or they create a new surname for the new family. Helen didn't like the latter idea, though she'd decided she wanted to take my name before it was suggested as an idea. In fact, the first time we ever discussed this was Helen telling me she'd like to take my surname. I hadn't really thought about it before that, I was too preoccupied with proposing and then being generally excitable

I didn't want something to show ownership, I just wanted something to show we were a family but that wouldn't get commented on or lead to assumptions whenever anyone found out. Sadly there aren't too many options for this.

I love this idea. Rebecca Annesdottir

I just tried to double-barrel your names in my head. Yours-His sounds like a kitchen caddy you'd buy from Lakeland, and His-Yours sounds like a Dickens character!

It is unfortunate that D's ex-girlfriend, who is a *ahem* very difficult person *ahem* currently works there and would have had a lot to say about why no-one should give him a job.

Much as I usually defend academia against claims that it's a unique bastion of elitism and plotting, there are points when I'm forced to conclude that this **** just doesn't happen anywhere else.

20692th most frequent in 1998

I love this idea. Rebecca Annesdottir

*snips*

I love this idea. Rebecca Annesdottir

That does sound cool. Elizabethsdottir, however, it a bit of a mouthful. I've always wondered how you kept track of who is related to whom in that system, but maybe it doesn't matter?

I love the pair of you went straight for the matronym. Not very common in Iceland, but it is heavily male-dominated in that regard.

So how is it decided, then? Do the parents just battle it out among themselves on the basis of what they think would sound better?

Hylean is your blue thing a FFVIII quote?

It is indeed. It's my favourite game in the series.

I just tried to double-barrel your names in my head. Yours-His sounds like a kitchen caddy you'd buy from Lakeland, and His-Yours sounds like a Dickens character!

I love the pair of you went straight for the matronym. Not very common in Iceland, but it is heavily male-dominated in that regard.

For authentic Icelandic ones: Rebekka Önnudóttir and Elísabetardóttir for Helenia. Your first name wouldn't need to change, though if you add an "a" to it, it'll fit the Icelandic declension pattern better.

The tradition is very much you take the father's name. Generally people who take the mother's name are making a statement: "I don't like my dad", "I don't know who my dad is", etc. There are some who do both and call themselves: StefánsdóttirMaríudóttir, to get both parents. I personally would choose on what sounds better. My dad's name is directly translatable, whereas my mum's isn't, so if I changed my name, I'd take his, despite her not liking this.