The Student Room Group

My girlfriend was a big slut, how to get over it?

Basically it started with us chatting on fb for a while, then getting with each other on a night out and straight to hers, something i very rarely manage. The next morning she told me all these stories about her and other guys she'd had and at the time it wasn't a big deal because i figured we wern't gonna go out due to the fact I was moving away next year, so these stories were just funny.

Anyways, in the 1 year she's been at uni she says she has slept with around 13 different guys including a 3 sum with 2 guys. Not to mention there were many other guys who just couldnt get it up so she doesnt count them.

Doing some maths i worked it out to be like 1 guy back a week! How i managed to be the one she fell in love with is beyond me, since it seems there were plenty of other opportunites to have a bf.

So im basically struggling to deal with it. Ive been with her 7 months now, and Ive brought it up with her so many times. ive told her that it disgusts me that shes had so many, that it's put me off before and many other things, but love conquers all. All my insinuations that she was a sket has nearly broken the relationship up before.

The only benefit i can ever get out of it, is that shes hot for me all the time (i can't complain, i've never been so sexually active!)

I guess i wouldn't be so fussed if i had a good history with getting with women, but i don't like most guys. What bothers me is that, i wonder if she is like a mega slut or something. Has anyone heard of many people getting with so many guys at uni? I just don't really know much about how often girls get laid. I assumed it would be like once a month maximum.

How do i get over this mental pain i suffer, that makes me almost hate her?

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Original post by Anonymous
Basically it started with us chatting on fb for a while, then getting with each other on a night out and straight to hers, something i very rarely manage. The next morning she told me all these stories about her and other guys she'd had and at the time it wasn't a big deal because i figured we wern't gonna go out due to the fact I was moving away next year, so these stories were just funny.

Anyways, in the 1 year she's been at uni she says she has slept with around 13 different guys including a 3 sum with 2 guys. Not to mention there were many other guys who just couldnt get it up so she doesnt count them.

Doing some maths i worked it out to be like 1 guy back a week! How i managed to be the one she fell in love with is beyond me, since it seems there were plenty of other opportunites to have a bf.

So im basically struggling to deal with it. Ive been with her 7 months now, and Ive brought it up with her so many times. ive told her that it disgusts me that shes had so many, that it's put me off before and many other things, but love conquers all. All my insinuations that she was a sket has nearly broken the relationship up before.

The only benefit i can ever get out of it, is that shes hot for me all the time (i can't complain, i've never been so sexually active!)

I guess i wouldn't be so fussed if i had a good history with getting with women, but i don't like most guys. What bothers me is that, i wonder if she is like a mega slut or something. Has anyone heard of many people getting with so many guys at uni? I just don't really know much about how often girls get laid. I assumed it would be like once a month maximum.

How do i get over this mental pain i suffer, that makes me almost hate her?


You're a disgrace. Either accept her for who she is or finish with her. Regardless of her sexual history she deserves a partner who loves her for being her and not trying to change her.
Reply 2
That'd be a few too many guys penetrating her for me personally, do what feels right I suppose but statistically this won't last.
Original post by Anonymous
Basically it started with us chatting on fb for a while, then getting with each other on a night out and straight to hers, something i very rarely manage. The next morning she told me all these stories about her and other guys she'd had and at the time it wasn't a big deal because i figured we wern't gonna go out due to the fact I was moving away next year, so these stories were just funny.

Anyways, in the 1 year she's been at uni she says she has slept with around 13 different guys including a 3 sum with 2 guys. Not to mention there were many other guys who just couldnt get it up so she doesnt count them.

Doing some maths i worked it out to be like 1 guy back a week! How i managed to be the one she fell in love with is beyond me, since it seems there were plenty of other opportunites to have a bf.

So im basically struggling to deal with it. Ive been with her 7 months now, and Ive brought it up with her so many times. ive told her that it disgusts me that shes had so many, that it's put me off before and many other things, but love conquers all. All my insinuations that she was a sket has nearly broken the relationship up before.

The only benefit i can ever get out of it, is that shes hot for me all the time (i can't complain, i've never been so sexually active!)

I guess i wouldn't be so fussed if i had a good history with getting with women, but i don't like most guys. What bothers me is that, i wonder if she is like a mega slut or something. Has anyone heard of many people getting with so many guys at uni? I just don't really know much about how often girls get laid. I assumed it would be like once a month maximum.

How do i get over this mental pain i suffer, that makes me almost hate her?


She's probably never had a lad in her life... Look at it this way, apart from what she's told you, have you ever seen evidence or heard it from anyone else?
I recommend you break up with her, just me reading this makes me disgusted.:eek:

If she has a lad a week, whats to stop her from cheating on you and going off with another lad?!?!?::angry:
Reply 4
Well first, you're only suffering this 'mental pain' because I imagine you are jealous of how many sexual partners she's had, and it also disgusts you because no guy wants to be with a girl who spreads her legs willy nilly at university.

This girl sounds like she's bored of having sex with random guys, and is now in a relationship with you. If you can't move past her having sex with so many guys, then I don't think she's right for you, even if you do have a lot of sex with her, because you'll just keep bringing it up and arguing with her about it, and that will just put unnecessary strain on your relationship.

The only way to forget about it is to focus on what you have with her now, because if she's a decent girl, she'll choose being with you in an exclusive relationship instead of having casual sex every week/fortnight.
Original post by Anonymous
Basically it started with us chatting on fb for a while, then getting with each other on a night out and straight to hers, something i very rarely manage. The next morning she told me all these stories about her and other guys she'd had and at the time it wasn't a big deal because i figured we wern't gonna go out due to the fact I was moving away next year, so these stories were just funny.

Anyways, in the 1 year she's been at uni she says she has slept with around 13 different guys including a 3 sum with 2 guys. Not to mention there were many other guys who just couldnt get it up so she doesnt count them.

Doing some maths i worked it out to be like 1 guy back a week! How i managed to be the one she fell in love with is beyond me, since it seems there were plenty of other opportunites to have a bf.

So im basically struggling to deal with it. Ive been with her 7 months now, and Ive brought it up with her so many times. ive told her that it disgusts me that shes had so many, that it's put me off before and many other things, but love conquers all. All my insinuations that she was a sket has nearly broken the relationship up before.

The only benefit i can ever get out of it, is that shes hot for me all the time (i can't complain, i've never been so sexually active!)

I guess i wouldn't be so fussed if i had a good history with getting with women, but i don't like most guys. What bothers me is that, i wonder if she is like a mega slut or something. Has anyone heard of many people getting with so many guys at uni? I just don't really know much about how often girls get laid. I assumed it would be like once a month maximum.

How do i get over this mental pain i suffer, that makes me almost hate her?


You slept with her the first time you met her and then pursued a relationship with this woman, I have absolutely no sympathy for you.
Look, if you'd slept with a girl a week you'd brag about it. Why is it such a big deal?
There is nothing wrong with what she did. She enjoyed having casual sex with people she didn't necessarily know, because it felt good. As long as everybody consented - and it seems they did - then she did nothing wrong. Now she is in a relationship with you and is no longer, presumably, doing this. Unless she's actually cheated on you then you have no reason to be upset - in fact, as you say, if it means that she's pretty good in the sack for having such experience, then that is just better for you. The attitude some people have towards 'sluts' utterly baffles me.
Reply 8
Grow up you ****
women have casual sex too
deal with it
Reply 9
And yet if a bloke had done the same thing it'd no doubt be congratulations and back-slapping all round.
Original post by Siân.
And yet if a bloke had done the same thing it'd no doubt be congratulations and back-slapping all round.


From who though? I hear this all the time and it's a minority of people who actually think it. I don't as I prefer to form a bond before becoming sexual with a woman, I can count the amount of sexual partners I've had on one hand and I'm in my early 20's. Obviously women aren't impressed by this sort of behaviour as is evident in this thread and there are a lot of men, for whatever reason (personal choice, jealousy, disgust etc) who also don't agree with it.

I have come to the conclusion that the only people impressed by this are those partaking in it themselves.
Dump her as you cannot deal with this and love her for all of her. There isn't anything with casual sex as long as she used conception and gets tested for STDs regularly.
Reply 12
Original post by Wilfred Little
From who though? I hear this all the time and it's a minority of people who actually think it. I don't as I prefer to form a bond before becoming sexual with a woman, I can count the amount of sexual partners I've had on one hand and I'm in my early 20's. Obviously women aren't impressed by this sort of behaviour as is evident in this thread and there are a lot of men, for whatever reason (personal choice, jealousy, disgust etc) who also don't agree with it.

I have come to the conclusion that the only people impressed by this are those partaking in it themselves.


I was being a little bit facetious in my previous post. It's just irksome that in general, society will brand a woman a "slut" or a "sket" for this sort of behaviour but men don't really get branded in the same way. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, of course, but there are double standards when it comes to this sort of thing.
Original post by Siân.
I was being a little bit facetious in my previous post. It's just irksome that in general, society will brand a woman a "slut" or a "sket" for this sort of behaviour but men don't really get branded in the same way. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, of course, but there are double standards when it comes to this sort of thing.


I see what you're saying, generally men find it easier to get away with this but women find it easier to get away with flaking and leading someone on.

I've said it before but people are James Blunts.
Why does it matter? As long as they practise safe sex, this shouldn't really be an issue.
Reply 15
Original post by Wilfred Little
I see what you're saying, generally men find it easier to get away with this but women find it easier to get away with flaking and leading someone on.

I've said it before but people are James Blunts.


:curious:

Okie dokie.

Original post by LipstickKisses
Why does it matter? As long as they practise safe sex, this shouldn't really be an issue.


Pretty much.
Original post by Siân.
:curious:

Okie dokie.


It happens.
Reply 17
Original post by Wilfred Little


I know it happens, but then I've been led on by a lad before, so that happens as well. There's an awful lot of nasty people out there and gender has no bearing on it.

That video is utterly ridiculous, by the way, and I sincerely hope you haven't formed your opinion based on that.
Original post by Siân.
I know it happens, but then I've been led on by a lad before, so that happens as well. There's an awful lot of nasty people out there and gender has no bearing on it.

That video is utterly ridiculous, by the way, and I sincerely hope you haven't formed your opinion based on that.


Original post by Siân.
It's just irksome that in general, society will brand a woman a "slut" or a "sket" for this sort of behaviour but men don't really get branded in the same way.


Okie dokie.

And no, I'm not basing that statement on one Youtube video, personal experiences comes into it too.
(edited 12 years ago)
Reply 19
Original post by Wilfred Little
Okie dokie.


I meant in terms of society's view of promiscuity. There's nothing wrong with either men or women having as many sexual partners as they want, as long as they do it safely.

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