Liking someone around 6-8 years older?

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Anonymous #1
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I am 18 (female), and I have this huge crush on someone who is probably 6-8 years older than me. I don't expect anything to come out of it (that would be very wishful thinking), specially not something very physical ... But when I tell my friends, they find the age difference hugely shocking and think I should be looking at him as a fatherly figure, and that I probably admire him (instead of having a crush). It is true that he is everything I want to be.

Is it possible that I am misinterpreting my admiration as a crush? And is the age difference really THAT bad?
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PinkMobilePhone
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#2
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I'm 28, my husband is 35. It's fine.

And your friends are talking *******s. How can you look at him as a father figure? He was 6-8 years old when you were born. He's not old enough to be your father!
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parasitic
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#3
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Wow, your friends really think that? In the end it's what you feel, if you like the guy then go for it. The age gap is not that big.

My parents had 6 year age gap. My mother and step-dad have 7 years gap.
I had 6 year gap which worked extremely well. Must admit I was a bit weird at first after hearign his age as he didn't feel that old. We got on so well.
Now I have 8 year age gap with my current man. It can seem a bit weird especially when someone asks how old is your man. They are usually shocked because I'm 20. The gap will only look better as you get into your 30s+. Now some people might be surprised, but as long as it works for you it's no big deal. My current boyfriend gets I.D at the shops still, and looks very young so it doesn't bother me because we get on ok.

I say go for it, that age gap is nothing. To me I would say maximum 10years but everyone's different and I noticed people can't put an age gap number to it- I tried, yet it kept going up and up because when you meat people you see them, not their age number
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Anonymous #2
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My parents have a very large age difference, but met later.

However, I'm in exactly the same situation as you - for some stupid reason I'm infatuated with someone much older with me.

Age difference probably isn't bad if you do have a true connection.
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alawhisp
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If you like him because of who he is, it's fine.

If you like him because he is older, well, that's a mistake many young girls make.
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Chillaxer
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For a woman and a man that's considered pretty normal, especially as time goes on a few years. Don't know why it's usually ok that way round, but not with the woman older.
When you think about it, women live about 7 years longer than men on average, so maybe men should be bale to be the younger partner too. I for one find this double standard annoying, especially given that a lot of women about 10- years older than me are so hot and sexy.
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allspunout
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If you both get on then why not? Life's too short to decide that actually, you really like someone but you won't make an effort to persue things, even as friends purely because he's older than you.

Carpe diem!
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miss_p
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I am 18 (female), and I have this huge crush on someone who is probably 6-8 years older than me. I don't expect anything to come out of it (that would be very wishful thinking), specially not something very physical ... But when I tell my friends, they find the age difference hugely shocking and think I should be looking at him as a fatherly figure, and that I probably admire him (instead of having a crush). It is true that he is everything I want to be.

Is it possible that I am misinterpreting my admiration as a crush? And is the age difference really THAT bad?
6-8 years and they're saying fatherly figure? Ha! That's a bit silly... Age gap isn't that big at all.

When I was 18, I had a huge crush on a guy who was 7 years older than me, and like you, I seriously never expected anything to ever come of it... but it did! Long story, but I'm 21 now and we're still friends and in contact So you never know, eh!
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eto
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(Original post by Anonymous)
someone who is probably 6-8 years older than me

is the age difference really THAT bad?
Funny girl...

If some man is 6 - 8 years older than you, it means that the age difference is practically absent. Say, 30 years - those age difference is really bad
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ilex_noemi
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my ex was 6 years older im 21 he was 27... never thought of age as a big deal when we were together.. but he really didn't look his age! Age is really nothing if you like each other good luck
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Anonymous #3
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that age gap is nothing. I'm 17 year old female, my boyfriend is 24. There is 6 and a half years between us.
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JosieG
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i would say it doesnt matter what age he is! the only thing to be careful is is that he's genuine... some older guys may only be interested in younger girls for one thing! but as long as you know hes interested in you for you... also if you know nothings going to come of it then it doesnt matter anyway, we're free to like who we like!
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DylanInTheMovies
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There's nothing whatsoever wrong with that age gap!
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Raving_Hippy
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#14
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(Original post by JosieG)
some older guys may only be interested in younger girls for one thing!
By 'one thing', I assume you mean sex. So what is wrong with a guy wanting a girl for sex? If he's honest about the fact that he only wants sex, and she's consenting and fine about it, then what's the problem?

Girls crack me up when they start talking about guys only 'wanting one thing'. Lol....OF COURSE we want to have sex with you, otherwise why would we be with you? That's what guys and girls do...sex, you know?

Personally, I'd be worried if a guy got with a girl but he DIDN'T want sex.
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AprilMay88
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If you're 18 and the age gap is 6 - 8 years that means at the most the guy is 26 years old. I wouldn't classify that as an age where men are considered as "fatherly figures".

I'm 23 and know plenty of men my age who have kids but I still don't look at them as being 'fatherly' haha.
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madders94
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I'm 17, my boyfriend is 27 - we've been together 13 months (compared to friends going out with people their own age, where it usually lasts a couple of months at the most before ending messily), he's my best friend and I love him. We have such a strong relationship because we're different to each other - we balance each other out It's also a much more mature relationship - we're not going into it thinking "If it doesn't work out, I'll find someone else" - we're planning our futures together and I love it.

We've had our fair share of criticism and I've lost a lot of friends because of it, but I've realized that it's not my fault they're immature - if they can't deal with me being happy, and can't accept the fact that age really is just a number, I'm better off without them. You're better off without "friends" who're narrow-minded enough to think that love can only exist within your year group.
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beccafairy
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#17
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i'm surprised your friends are that shocked, it's really not that big a gap? my boyfriend is six years older than me, he's 25 and i'm 19, and none of my (or his) friends have a problem with it. i don't get why you've said he's like a 'fatherly figure', what kind of 6-8 year old boy has a kid?! :P
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mikelwhile
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#18
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17 and my boyfriend is 23, 6 years 2 months to be exact on the age gap. Do we notice it? Yeah, at times, but never in a negative way. Do other people notice it; no but when they find out about it they don't give a damn and if they do, I don't. At the end of the day as long as you're both happy and it's a 100% mutual relationship then it's fine!
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Anonymous #4
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I'm in a simular situation except mine is nearer 10 years difference, people will be quick to judge, personally I believe age shouldn't matter just society today has a different perspective and has brain washed minds. I am 16. I mean that do what you wish, your friends can only support you, you are an adult, free to make your own decissions
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AprilMay88
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm in a simular situation except mine is nearer 10 years difference, people will be quick to judge, personally I believe age shouldn't matter just society today has a different perspective and has brain washed minds. I am 16. I mean that do what you wish, your friends can only support you, you are an adult, free to make your own decissions
Sorry but 16 going out with a 26 year old, that's a bit dodgy. I hope you didn't start seeing each other until you were 16...
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