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Am I In The Wrong?
My girlfriend 'cheated' (kissed another bloke, more than once...) on me. I'm gutted and all depressed because I don't think I deserve it and have never done anything or even thought of anything that could warrant her doing what she did.
Anyway, maybe I'm too idealistic but I think once someone's cheated, I can never feel the same way about them again, they'll probably 're-offend' and that anyone worth my time and my feelings would not cheat. So perhaps I should move on?
Except I thought she was different, she was one of the nicest girls I've ever met. The nicest. She says she wouldn't do it again and that she wouldn't intentionall do it but when you kiss someone MORE THAN ONCE it just sickens me. I feel like everyone uses me, takes the **** out of me...at least every girl I've ever wanted...
Should I get back with her? Or what...I want some advice and sympathy please
Anyway, maybe I'm too idealistic but I think once someone's cheated, I can never feel the same way about them again, they'll probably 're-offend' and that anyone worth my time and my feelings would not cheat. So perhaps I should move on?
Except I thought she was different, she was one of the nicest girls I've ever met. The nicest. She says she wouldn't do it again and that she wouldn't intentionall do it but when you kiss someone MORE THAN ONCE it just sickens me. I feel like everyone uses me, takes the **** out of me...at least every girl I've ever wanted...
Should I get back with her? Or what...I want some advice and sympathy please
Don't. Just don't.
People don't change, and if she's done it before she'll do it again.
Find yourself somebody new who's lovely and truly deserves you.
Good luck
x
People don't change, and if she's done it before she'll do it again.
Find yourself somebody new who's lovely and truly deserves you.
Good luck
x
Tough break man, but people do cheat, it isn't human nature to be monogamous IMHO. If she is really sorry about it, and she's worth it, forgive. But if she's just another user who abuses how kind you are, walk away....
Leave her. It'll be tough, but you really deserve better.
The sadistic part of me would suggest that you keep in contact with her, just so that you can rub it in when you've found someone new and are happy with her, and your ex is bitter and lonely.
However, the nice, normal part of me, would suggest just cutting off all contact. Go spend time with your friends, get over her. Once the initial break-up pangs have gone, you might be able to maintain a friendship with her. Best of luck, anyway xxx
The sadistic part of me would suggest that you keep in contact with her, just so that you can rub it in when you've found someone new and are happy with her, and your ex is bitter and lonely.
However, the nice, normal part of me, would suggest just cutting off all contact. Go spend time with your friends, get over her. Once the initial break-up pangs have gone, you might be able to maintain a friendship with her. Best of luck, anyway xxx
If you really don't think you can overlook it (and most people can't!) get rid of her. Once is once too many...let alone more than once! 
If it was just one time, she was truly apologetic and really sorry I would probably give her the benefit of the doubt. However it is not one time and therefore not at all excusable.
Dump her. Even if she promises never to do it again how can you trust her?
Dump her. Even if she promises never to do it again how can you trust her?
Well having been in the position of the kissing girlfriend I guess I'm biased, but make sure you think things through and have a proper talk with her before making any decisions. I guess the question to ask is why. A lot of women cheat because of problems in the relationship, feeling unloved or neglected etc.
In my case I just got incredibly scared of the thought of being with my bf for the rest of my life and never going through the first phases of attraction again. We were virtually living together so going out didn't feel like a "date" any more, there was no mystery, passion had started to give way to practicalities like housework and I started to feel undesired. I found myself doing his washing one day and I just freaked. That evening an attractive man chatted me up and I realised how much I had missed that, so I kissed him. I realised very quickly that it wasn't what I wanted, and after I explained to my bf we decided to make a real go of it, and to make sure we had regular romantic "dates". Five months on and I would never even consider doing it again, but I'm glad I did because it brought stuff to the surface that needed discussing.
Obviously I don't know the details of what your gf did, but it's clear that you care a lot about her and your relationship. Maybe things will be clearer to you after a break?
In my case I just got incredibly scared of the thought of being with my bf for the rest of my life and never going through the first phases of attraction again. We were virtually living together so going out didn't feel like a "date" any more, there was no mystery, passion had started to give way to practicalities like housework and I started to feel undesired. I found myself doing his washing one day and I just freaked. That evening an attractive man chatted me up and I realised how much I had missed that, so I kissed him. I realised very quickly that it wasn't what I wanted, and after I explained to my bf we decided to make a real go of it, and to make sure we had regular romantic "dates". Five months on and I would never even consider doing it again, but I'm glad I did because it brought stuff to the surface that needed discussing.
Obviously I don't know the details of what your gf did, but it's clear that you care a lot about her and your relationship. Maybe things will be clearer to you after a break?
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